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How to tell if a girl is playing hard to get or isn't interested


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I know some of you guys will say don't be bother with a girl that is playing mind games but please just say what they'd do to play hard to get on social media and in person

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I can't tell you what a woman would do to play hard to get because I've never played games with people I'm interested in. And that's the thing - if she was into you, she wouldn't risk driving you away.

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ya and same thing about "mixed signals" They aren't mixed, you just can't take "I'm not interested" for an answer.

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I think you just have to assume it's disinterest. I've never known a woman who played hard to get and wouldn't show some interest if she had any interest in a guy, because why make them mad for no reason?

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CautiouslyOptimistic
I think you just have to assume it's disinterest. I've never known a woman who played hard to get and wouldn't show some interest if she had any interest in a guy, because why make them mad for no reason?

 

Right. And, also, are you trying to get this woman? If not, you can't accuse her of playing hard to get. When I was in college many moons ago there was a guy who accused ME of playing mind games.....but he never asked me out or anything, or really even showed interest in me other than telling me I was a tease. It was very confusing for me because I did not even have all that much interaction with him!

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staggerlee71

point!

 

I was thinking a little later in the relationship. hot cold... in the end mixed signals mean the same thing.

 

i always bail on mixed signals in the beginning. i see them and just don't care.

 

but the funny thing about them when your invested, is how glaring they are but you can spin them to fit your story. a person really has to be true to themselves, control their pure emotion, recognize flags(mixed signals), and then act accordingly.

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I have a rule, mixed signals are a turn off, NEXT!!!! Nobody's got time for that, life is too short to be wasting it on worrying about someone.

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The Urbanyst

Hard to get: Responsive, and FRIENDLY, but busy.

 

Not interested: Dry, flat, boring, distant, slow to respond. Only available when all other plans fall through (if at all)

 

Both types of women are bad news though.

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Hard to get: Responsive, and FRIENDLY, but busy.

 

Not interested: Dry, flat, boring, distant, slow to respond. Only available when all other plans fall through (if at all)

 

Both types of women are bad news though.

 

That is exactly what she does. We used to talk a lot on Facebook and I sometimes send snapchats or I put snaps on my story and she'd message me about whatever the snap was. I also asked her out twice, the first time no one took her shift so we couldn't go, the second time it was her brothers birthday but she forgot (it actually was her brothers birthday) but she didn't ask for a reschedule. I don't wanna ask her out a third time without 100% knowing she's interested

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I know some of you guys will say don't be bother with a girl that is playing mind games but please just say what they'd do to play hard to get on social media and in person

 

Listen you have all the answers, do what you want with this sort of girl. She's like to tease, flirt and be in the drivers seat. You just accept it or just jump out of her control! Not much else you can do. Can't change her mind this is the sort of person she is!

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That is exactly what she does. We used to talk a lot on Facebook and I sometimes send snapchats or I put snaps on my story and she'd message me about whatever the snap was. I also asked her out twice, the first time no one took her shift so we couldn't go, the second time it was her brothers birthday but she forgot (it actually was her brothers birthday) but she didn't ask for a reschedule. I don't wanna ask her out a third time without 100% knowing she's interested

I'm pretty sure she's not interested if you have to ask us. You asked her out twice cmon...

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There are people who play games but just because someones' perception of another is: "hot/cold," or "hard to get," doesn't actually mean anything is going on.

 

Don't forget people with social anxiety issues (extremely love shy) are unable to take it to the next level and may give off the hot/cold vibe mainly because they are frustrated at themselves.

 

I've been accused of this SO many times in my life when in reality I was totally unaware of someone else' attraction to me or I was stepping back to avoid giving the wrong impression.

 

Sometimes when we're attracted to someone (unrequited) we tend to grasp at straws that aren't there.

 

One coworker years ago was head over heals for me. The problem: I didn't know him, I didn't know he was attracted to me and I didn't even work in his department. In his eyes I was "playing games," and eventually he became hostile and badmouthed me to others.

 

Lesson: If you think someone is playing hot/cold and you are attracted to them understand that you may have to up the ante and escalate the flirting and make your intentions known.

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The few times l've come across it , l could tell the difference and it was really cute , l respected it because it was genuine if that makes any sense.

 

But in someone elses sitch l couldn't explain the difference between genuine old fashion hard to get or just plain bs and she's not feeling it.

lf l knew first hand everything she was doing, then l could tell , but not like this.

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OatsAndHall

You asked her out twice, it was a no-go twice so I'd just call it a day and avoid getting burned a third time... I'd stay in contact with her though as you never know what an happen.

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The Urbanyst
That is exactly what she does. We used to talk a lot on Facebook and I sometimes send snapchats or I put snaps on my story and she'd message me about whatever the snap was. I also asked her out twice, the first time no one took her shift so we couldn't go, the second time it was her brothers birthday but she forgot (it actually was her brothers birthday) but she didn't ask for a reschedule. I don't wanna ask her out a third time without 100% knowing she's interested

 

She is not interested.

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Right. And, also, are you trying to get this woman? If not, you can't accuse her of playing hard to get. When I was in college many moons ago there was a guy who accused ME of playing mind games.....but he never asked me out or anything, or really even showed interest in me other than telling me I was a tease. It was very confusing for me because I did not even have all that much interaction with him!

 

Exactly. Trying to blame the woman because you yourself are too chicken to ask her out.

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TheFinalWord
I know some of you guys will say don't be bother with a girl that is playing mind games but please just say what they'd do to play hard to get on social media and in person

 

You ask her out once with a detailed plan in mind: Would you like to meet for coffee Sunday at noon. If she does not give a clear "yes", she is saying no. At that point, stop texting, facebooking, etc. If she continues to reach out, only ONE more time do you put the same offer forward with clear plans. If once again you are blown off, you never contact her or initiate again. Ever. If she reaches out, do not flirt, do not chat. Ask do you want to meet? If games are played, cease communication, "I have to go, reach out when you are available to meet!". That's the formula. Any deviations are on you.:bunny:

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anthonywatts
ya and same thing about "mixed signals" They aren't mixed, you just can't take "I'm not interested" for an answer.

 

In my fairly extensive dating experience, this is an enormous oversimplification, so much so as to be completely dismissed.

 

The pattern of cynicism in a majority of the female poster's responses on loveshack should be noted however.

 

Any objective person would notice and I've only been reading this forum casually for a few days!

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Cookiesandough

Well, with "hard to get" girls, you can actually "get" them...it's just harder. If they're not interested they continue ignoring/stringing you along/filing a restraining order

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