jimmy2134 Posted August 9, 2005 Share Posted August 9, 2005 Hi there was looking for some advice on situation i have to see wether i am being little unreasonable or am justified in my actions.I have been dating a lovely attractive and outgoing women for few months now and our relationship is going great except for one small problem i think she flirts excessively with other guys at times.About 2 months into relationship she was on holiday with single pal to greece and when she got home she admitted straightaway she had a very brief drunken snog with local guy lasting few minutes but that was it and i totally believe her when she said nothing else happened,obviously whilst not over the moon at this i wasn't too upset as holiday had been booked months in advance when sh was totally single and at the time looking forward to it big time.However i have noticed that she sometimes in my eyes overdoes flirting when she is out the other night we were in same club but not together she was with her pal and i was with my mate.I try and keep out of her road most of night as i don't want to come acoss as jealous boyfriend but later on i had ventured downstairs and seen her on dancefloor with good looking guy who was obviously trying to put moves on her(putting his arm around her ,whispering into her ear etc and even although nothing happened between them i felt a bit uncomfarable as she was obviously enjoying the attention,later on she came and found me and was honest about being chatted up,i didn't make too much of a deal of it but did point out to her hat there is flirting and then there's FLIRTING and whilst i was totall comfartable with one i asn't too happy with other,this has happened on couple of occassions so the other night we hasd talk and i said to her would she b happy if situation was reversed and she admitted probably not and she did apologise and said she would ry and calm things down a litte so i guess we will see what happens,any info from guys and girls woul be appreciated,thanks jimmy. Link to post Share on other sites
Cecelius Posted August 9, 2005 Share Posted August 9, 2005 Your girl is an attention wh0re -- she is at the age where her self-esteem is low and she needs the attention of other men to build it up and justify her existence. That is why she flirts so much. It is a red flag, and it CANNOT be fixed. Your only choice is to not care and make sure you get across very subtly that you're into her for fun primarily (whether this is true or not -- if you give her your heart, she will stomp on it) and that you WILL walk the moment something shady happens. This is calm and cool, not jealous threats. You should not, however, tolerate any disrespect (like what you saw at the club): I frankly would have just walked up to her with a smirk and shook the other guy's hand and whispered in his ear "Congrats, mate. She's all yours. God help you..." and walked away without a care in the world. Second, I cannot understand why you are dating this girl: she went on a holiday with a friend -- was he male? That would end it to me (meaning, I don't care if I've been dating her for 2 days or 2 years, a girl who goes on holiday with a male friend is not my g/f). Were you two exclusive yet? You cannot take out an "option to cheat" simply because an event was scheduled before the relationship occurred. Your best alternative is to enjoy what time you have for her (which you should limit). Do not get attached, do not talk about the future-- the easier you make it for her (letting her know that you are there no matter what), the easier she will find it to assume there is little risk in losing you, and her behavior will go downhill. Link to post Share on other sites
Craig Posted August 9, 2005 Share Posted August 9, 2005 What is a "snog?" Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted August 9, 2005 Share Posted August 9, 2005 She went on a vacation with a friend while you were exclusively dating and on the trip she had sex with some guy and you are O.K. with this since she booked the trip before you guys were dating? What is wrong with this picture? Why would you wish to have a girlfriend who had sex with another guy on a trip and who enjoys over the top flirting? By the way, I would get yourself checked for STD's. The bugs in Europe are many times a different strain than in American and more difficult to get rid of. I learned this the hard way. Link to post Share on other sites
Cecelius Posted August 9, 2005 Share Posted August 9, 2005 I believe "snog" is UK-slang for kiss -- I do not know how serious a kiss, but Harry Potter and his pals "snog" (I used to think it meant a BJ...) Link to post Share on other sites
Author jimmy2134 Posted August 9, 2005 Author Share Posted August 9, 2005 sorry guys i should have mentioned a snog is a kiss ,so yeah she kissed guy for few minutes while drunk on holiday and it was a girlfriend she went on holiday with not a male friend that i would not have put up with even for a second. Link to post Share on other sites
Author jimmy2134 Posted August 9, 2005 Author Share Posted August 9, 2005 maybe i was bit too harsh in my description earlier the other couple of times she was flirting a bit she did tell the guy very quickly she had a boyfriend,i personally don't mind partern flirting a bit but i feel in a relationship you hace to compromise with each other she has said she will so i will watch very carefully and see what happens. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts