Author Wobugan Posted October 28, 2017 Author Share Posted October 28, 2017 (edited) Got a text from her sent to my mother as i have blocked my telephone number. **** First of all i just want to wish you good luck with your new education, you have fought so hard for this. For the second part i just wanted you to know that it makes me so sad seeing everyone deleting me everywhere, your friends, family and you. Then it is also me who is feeling like you are not the same person as i knew and that feels really sad. I don´t think i have done anything wrong, i moved on maybe to quickly for you but i have never treated you badly. You must think i am the worlds biggest idiot but don´t say something bad about me. It´s sad that you don´t see all the times i stod up for you and when i was by your side with everything and helped you out. All those times are erased from your memory, deleted and vanished. But i know that and that is the most important thing for me right now. Take care and good luck. I answered her: I have no problem with you moving on, i have a problem with WHAT you are moving on to. Yes i think you are the worlds biggest idiot, i dont have any problem with you moving on i have a problem with what you are moving on to. But thats your life and what you choose to do with it is none of my business anymore. But what does it matter, everything is ruined anyways and for what really? Nothing is erased from my memory, just covered with dirt. I want to cut all ties to you and move on with my life. Don´t contact me again. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Why is she contacting me with this now? It´s a bit wierd how her considered "moving on" still don´t seem to have progressed anything lol. My friends have said nothing about her posting anything on FB or anything on social media with them two, no one has heard a word about it. Most likely failed? I hope it fails, for her own good. She is a smart girl studying medicine at one of the better schools she can find a nice guy not this ****ing trash. I am for myself starting to get away from the oneism a bit but damn how much i miss her family how i miss what we used to have and how i wish this never happened. Still makes me so discusted and absolutely gut wrenching thinking about them two, i hate her. It sucks, and i will never go through this bull**** again, absolute ****ing bullocks.. br Edited October 28, 2017 by Wobugan Link to post Share on other sites
Highndry Posted October 29, 2017 Share Posted October 29, 2017 Sorry you are having such a hard time. There were some good responses in this thread. You did nothing wrong and essentially got burned in love. It happens to the best of us. As far as her contacting you - if you read that letter it is unbelievably selfish. It's all about her, and I see no apology for how she dumped you or anything. I'm not sure I would have even responded, but since you did I think it's great that you told her not to contact you again. If she does again through your family I would recommend having them tell her that she is not welcome to do so and that they will block her, too. Good luck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wobugan Posted October 29, 2017 Author Share Posted October 29, 2017 (edited) gosh gosh, now as she contacted me i just have not been able to sleep the wole night AGAIN. It´s so obvious she dumped me for someone else the breakup came in late april. In Februrary roughly i once drew her and her friend to a party he invited them to i was OK with them going as there were many of her high school friends there that she wanted to see wich she had not meet in years. It´s obvious they were in contact during our RL and that is absolutely ****ed. Who know she might even missed him the whole 4 years? What a scum She might even started taking drugs herself lol, i hope this goes to hell for her i am really sorry to say that but i really do.... Edited October 29, 2017 by Wobugan Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted October 29, 2017 Share Posted October 29, 2017 You need to block this girl from having any contact with you, through any channel. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wobugan Posted November 1, 2017 Author Share Posted November 1, 2017 (edited) I miss her Everyday, miss how we used to talk, miss who we used to be, miss my own happiness, i miss the old me the laughing, joking and ambitious guy. I miss myself. Who have i Turned Into? I have began studying, working out, moved from Home but i still have headache every day because i am missing her. She is with a junkee stoner loser ex of her, probably happy as well. And i am here, devastated, lost and confused. After 5 months i have gone complete NC, i have blocked her completely and now after 1 month of full NC i feel emptier than ever. Why is this? Edited November 1, 2017 by Wobugan Link to post Share on other sites
Frostedflake Posted November 1, 2017 Share Posted November 1, 2017 Because you're looking for some "Big Bang" moment. You're doing all the right things so you should automatically feel better, right? No. It doesn't work like that. Doing the right things keeps you healthy, keeps you from getting worse. But you still have to ride out the emotional crap, we all do. It takes time. You may very well wake up one day happy and be like, "When did this happen?" And you'll be able to recall all the positive steps you made. But right now, you're still making those steps. Don't rush it. 1 month NC is a great start, but it is still the beginning. 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Alo2008 Posted November 2, 2017 Share Posted November 2, 2017 (edited) Totally agree with Frosted Flake Wobugan. I’m two weeks through NC, and I’m doing better than I thought I would be, but that’s because when I was low I was really low. You need to surround yourself with those that are close to you. You need to continue the constant grind of life. Not just to survive but to improve yourself. And not to improve yourself for your ex or your next woman but for yourself. Make yourself so much better that you can look back months and years from now and say “wow look how far I’ve come”. Just take everything in one day at a time, day by day. I think you need to start by letting go though because it sounds like you haven’t since you’re stilll stuck thinking about why she’s with her ex. That doesn’t matter anymore. The only thing that matters now is you. I’m not saying to totally let go forever, but you need to let go the idea that she’s going to be with you in the present and foreseeable future. Maybe down the road you guys will reunite if that is God’s will and that’s what you want. But you have to move forward for yourself thinking that she may never come back because you need to live life too. We all do. Edited November 2, 2017 by Alo2008 1 Link to post Share on other sites
lostsoul4286 Posted November 2, 2017 Share Posted November 2, 2017 Totally agree with Frosted Flake Wobugan. I’m two weeks through NC, and I’m doing better than I thought I would be, but that’s because when I was low I was really low. You need to surround yourself with those that are close to you. You need to continue the constant grind of life. Not just to survive but to improve yourself. And not to improve yourself for your ex or your next woman but for yourself. Make yourself so much better that you can look back months and years from now and say “wow look how far I’ve come”. Just take everything in one day at a time, day by day. I think you need to start by letting go though because it sounds like you haven’t since you’re stilll stuck thinking about why she’s with her ex. That doesn’t matter anymore. The only thing that matters now is you. I’m not saying to totally let go forever, but you need to let go the idea that she’s going to be with you in the present and foreseeable future. Maybe down the road you guys will reunite if that is God’s will and that’s what you want. But you have to move forward for yourself thinking that she may never come back because you need to live life too. We all do. I agree with the last two posts. Essentially you have to embrace those negative feelings and sit with them, cut off the thoughts, but sit with those feelings. Little by little it'll get easier to live with and eventually you'll be able to carry on with your life while you feel these emotions in the future. And when you've accomplished that, it'll be the biggest step forward of personal growth you've ever experienced. Most of us on here have walked this path, and are still walking it. Know that we're next to you also getting over someone we once loved unconditionally. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wobugan Posted November 2, 2017 Author Share Posted November 2, 2017 It feels like i Will never mer someone like her. I have never loved someone so deeply and never been al loved by someone eitver. I miss everything so much Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wobugan Posted November 5, 2017 Author Share Posted November 5, 2017 Friend told me today in a Skype chat that her new found relationship with the junkee ex went to hell. Why is it i am feeling better since i know they are not seeing eachother anymore? Is this normal that i get some kind of satisfaction from this? Deep down i dont want her to be anything but happy even if it is not with me.... Link to post Share on other sites
ExpatInItaly Posted November 5, 2017 Share Posted November 5, 2017 Yes, it's normal to feel satisfied upon hearing that news. Just know that feeling won't last, because it won't undo the pain you feel form her initial departure. You need to tell your friends to not update you on her, at all. Ultimately, it doesn't help you. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
springy Posted November 9, 2017 Share Posted November 9, 2017 After 5 months i have gone complete NC, i have blocked her completely and now after 1 month of full NC i feel emptier than ever. Why is this? You have not been complete NC. You have listened to gossip about her from your friends, viewed her social media and just a few days ago responded to a text sent via your mother. Not NC in the least. Tell your mom, friends and anyone else who tries to provide an update or pass along a message that you don't want to hear it anymore and stay off her social media accounts. If she manages to slip a message through anyway, ignore it. Are you still seeing the counselor or did they just put you on an antidepressant and send you on your way? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wobugan Posted November 13, 2017 Author Share Posted November 13, 2017 You have not been complete NC. You have listened to gossip about her from your friends, viewed her social media and just a few days ago responded to a text sent via your mother. Not NC in the least. Tell your mom, friends and anyone else who tries to provide an update or pass along a message that you don't want to hear it anymore and stay off her social media accounts. If she manages to slip a message through anyway, ignore it. Are you still seeing the counselor or did they just put you on an antidepressant and send you on your way? Indeed i have not been complete NC..... I am still seeing the counselor from time to time as well as taking antidepressants before going to sleep. I feel ok from time to time, i was with my friend in stockholm this weekend and had a blast but once i get home i just feel so empty and lonely. I know she aint coming back, and why would i want her back after she went to her ****ty ex? I ask myself everyday why she did this, why she ruined everything with this how she was able to turn so cold and so distant so sharply it was a big shock to me.. I don´t ever want to feel like that again in my entire life, it feels like my view of love have been completely ruined by this like i will never be able to trust someone fully again. Why the **** did she do this to me and to us i would never ****ing do it.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wobugan Posted November 13, 2017 Author Share Posted November 13, 2017 (edited) I HATE HER SO ****IBG MUCH I ****INT hate how she has caused me headache depression anxirty panic attscks trust isdues and made my life a ****ing miserabel mess. Not being able to ****ing sleep for 7 months FICK THIS ****KNT WHORE ****ing cow Give me my ****ing life back, let me ****ing laugh and be happy and cheerful as ny old me not this ****ing psychopath antidepressant miserable loser i have Turned Into. Wtf has happened to me feels like u Will never trust someone wuthout having this crap in the back of my mind how i felt these months no one deserve this. I do not wish this pain upon anyone. Walking arojnd whole ****ing day with a train in your head like a lobomotic zombie feeling all dry and discusted of youself. My self esteem is completely ruined. FICK this Edited November 13, 2017 by Wobugan Link to post Share on other sites
BC1980 Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 I HATE HER SO ****IBG MUCH I ****INT hate how she has caused me headache depression anxirty panic attscks trust isdues and made my life a ****ing miserabel mess. Not being able to ****ing sleep for 7 months FICK THIS ****KNT WHORE ****ing cow Give me my ****ing life back, let me ****ing laugh and be happy and cheerful as ny old me not this ****ing psychopath antidepressant miserable loser i have Turned Into. Wtf has happened to me feels like u Will never trust someone wuthout having this crap in the back of my mind how i felt these months no one deserve this. I do not wish this pain upon anyone. Walking arojnd whole ****ing day with a train in your head like a lobomotic zombie feeling all dry and discusted of youself. My self esteem is completely ruined. FICK this I remember feeling this way. It will pass. I have a good chuckle and an eye roll when I look back at all of it and how upset I was. It's good to write out how you feel and share it with someone. It makes it real somehow. Link to post Share on other sites
Highndry Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 Something that may help you get it out: Write emails to her but DO NOT put her address in the address bar. You don't want to accidentally send it. Then, delete them after you get every hateful thing off your chest. I have done this, even saved them in my "drafts" folder, then read them later, laughed, and deleted. The anger comes and goes, but it's normal. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wobugan Posted November 18, 2017 Author Share Posted November 18, 2017 Still have very bad days especislly at night or when i have little to do i try to keep myself busy. It feels so empty being here in my studentdoorm 5 hours away from Home it feels so depressing. Why did this happen to me? What on earth have i done to deserve this. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wobugan Posted December 3, 2017 Author Share Posted December 3, 2017 (edited) I dont know ett but i have been feeling so much better now over the last few weeks. School is going fine, i get the best grades in every class and i work hard trying to balance part time work at the consultants firm. Me and my friend have gotten our first Office for our startup project besides our studies and i have as well taken on being a chairman in the student association. Life is fine, it really is. I have even started to go on a few dates with a girl 10x more prettier and driven than my ex, wish i could post a pic i am sure you would be amazed of this beautiful creature. I have worked out 3-5 Times per week for 5 months straight as well as eating as proper as i can. I am in the best shape of my life probably. I would actually say after all those months i am finally.... Happy again? Ofc i do still Think about my ex and what we shared, but i am starting to feel fine. This forum has been such a massive support for me. I am thankful for that Edited December 3, 2017 by Wobugan 4 Link to post Share on other sites
Purepony Posted December 3, 2017 Share Posted December 3, 2017 Glad you are getting back in the grove Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wobugan Posted December 25, 2017 Author Share Posted December 25, 2017 (edited) Just figured i Will give a quick update. Have been feeling loads better for everyday. However a bit of a setback now during christmas as i got told by my grandmothert thst she has been sending her a bit of texts lately since around this junkee ex thing ended. Texts like "i miss you" "i have been thinking a lot about you lately" blablablabla "happy holidays" etc It disgusts me, shall i ask my grandmother to not respond or to ask her not to Contact her again. it Brothers my grandmother a bit as well but she is to Nice and they were extremly close before. Sucks so much that she went to that junkee otherwise i could see myself being "friends" with her in the coming future, i just simply cant help to feel so angry at her för that. Edited December 25, 2017 by Wobugan Link to post Share on other sites
1fish2fish Posted December 25, 2017 Share Posted December 25, 2017 How pathetic of her - sending her breadcrumbs to your grandmother. If your grandmother doesn't want to block her texts, maybe ask her instead to not tell you if your ex reaches out to her anymore. This is merely a small bump in your road of healing. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wobugan Posted December 28, 2017 Author Share Posted December 28, 2017 (edited) How pathetic of her - sending her breadcrumbs to your grandmother. If your grandmother doesn't want to block her texts, maybe ask her instead to not tell you if your ex reaches out to her anymore. This is merely a small bump in your road of healing. Indeed, the miss you ones are i guess directed at my grandmother as well as the thinking about you etc ones as well. But ofc i do still Think she misses me to some extent now as well. Even if they were so close i still thinks its a bit ****ed up off her to "use" my grandmother in some way. In the betingning of the breakup she kept communicating with her about me. I Will tell my grandmother not to tell me about it again. Its kind A funny qctually hos i since got told about the crumbs have fallen back a little... Whatevs Edited December 28, 2017 by Wobugan Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wobugan Posted January 28, 2018 Author Share Posted January 28, 2018 Just wanted to give a quick update. I have been working sooo hard on myself i realized lately. I am in the absolute best shape of my life, i work out 5-6 times a week eating healthy as well as working and studying. I get a lot of notice from the opposite sex and i really feel so much better and healthier overall, my family said when i was home i was like a complete changed positive person. Guess the 6+ months of hard training will make me a bit more atteactive haaha. I lately even picked up muay thai or thai boxing something which i have found myself to really like and something i never thought i would dare to do. I still think about my ex but it is not in the same way it used to be, i am getting happier for each day and i truly want and WILL become 100% happy by myself. Its such a wierd feeling looking at pictures of myself 6 months ago and seeing that sad depressed unsecure little boy. Damn i really which i could post them here. Best regards 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Wobugan Posted February 10, 2018 Author Share Posted February 10, 2018 ehhhh her "rebound" guy started following my little sister on instagram? Wtf? Hate how such small things just gives me reminders of what happened, still think it is very wierd lol. However i am feeling fine myself and life is going good Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts