Cat Posted May 11, 2001 Share Posted May 11, 2001 Someone was saying that when you are the ice queen the boys seem to love it.I always complain that guys in NY don't bring me flowers and kiss my ass like the guys in SF did. well...I just met this guy,we went our Friday night and we talked about pc and stuff ( we are both in the industry.He called after the date to thank me.I thought that was weird.is that weird? Then on sunday he asked me if i wanted to borrow his top of the line video game system and brought it over and hooked it up for me. My friends all think he's cool..and they think it's so sweet that he wants to do things for me.But i think he's kinda a chump pulling out the stops like that.Loaning me his dreamcast when bearly knows me? He could have started small with a playstation or something I guess i want guys to do thing for me,but i want the wrong guys to do them for me.I want the guys who I know won't do anything for me to do stuff for me.I know we all want what we can't have,but I also wonder if there is an issue with being open to getting what I deserve. This all started when i get into the groove in NY,my first couple months here I dated chumps and liked it.Then all of a sudden I met this looser DJ and dumped the gainfully employed guy who was happy to take me out to dinner and kiss my ass.Maybe it's just that I'm not over mr looser DJ..but it seems like lots of girls in NY are like this.My best friend is always telling me I could do better,but I'm always telling her the same thing..her bf is total sponge. Link to post Share on other sites
Dragonflys Posted May 11, 2001 Share Posted May 11, 2001 Hello there Cat lady I grapple with this stuff all the time. As others will say we do often want what we don't have. I can admit that in my case when a girl falls in my lap I do get the feeling that it is too much and get turned off, but then if my relationship with that girl suddenly becomes threatened I am turned on somewhat. I don't know where that comes from (It's probably a primordial [evolutionary quirk] thing we all have and has nothing to do with rationality.) Most people have said to me all through my life that I should just enjoy the moment, enjoy the time spent, and keap a piece of myself to myself to keep the spark alive. As I get older I realise they are wise words. No matter how wise we think we are, we still follow our nose to some degree, and have the freedom to do so in modern society. So bottom line: Roll with it! Oliver Link to post Share on other sites
Cat Posted May 11, 2001 Share Posted May 11, 2001 You SAID," I can admit that in my case when a girl falls in my lap I do get the feeling that it is too much and get turned off.." How will you really feel if that girl leaves you one day?? Link to post Share on other sites
Dragonflys Posted May 11, 2001 Share Posted May 11, 2001 Well, if it's next week, I'll probably get over it quite quickly. If it's in ten years it will probably be extremely tough, but that is how life is. I only hope if that does happen, it is for the better. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted May 11, 2001 Share Posted May 11, 2001 This whole deal is a maturity thing. Most men and women go through a stage of wanting and going after what they can't have. Eventually they get screwed over often enough to really appreciate a nice guy. Give yourself some time. Nobody wants a lovesick wimp or somebody they can walk all over. The guy you eventually end up with will probably be a good combination of nice guy and bastard. Say, 88.6 percent nice guy...and 11.4 percent the rest. But it sounds like you're at the age when really nice guys can be truly boring and until you're absolutely ready, they will bore you to tears. Meanwhile, when you have an urgent need for flowers or to have your ass kissed, while in New York do these for yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
Curiously Posted May 11, 2001 Share Posted May 11, 2001 This whole deal is a maturity thing. Most men and women go through a stage of wanting and going after what they can't have. Eventually they get screwed over often enough to really appreciate a nice guy. Give yourself some time. Nobody wants a lovesick wimp or somebody they can walk all over. The guy you eventually end up with will probably be a good combination of nice guy and bastard. Say, 88.6 percent nice guy...and 11.4 percent the rest. But it sounds like you're at the age when really nice guys can be truly boring and until you're absolutely ready, they will bore you to tears. Meanwhile, when you have an urgent need for flowers or to have your ass kissed, while in New York do these for yourself. Link to post Share on other sites
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