Dating a short guy-How does it feel?

[Gr8fuln2020]

The average American Male is 5’9” and 5’3 ½” for females.

 

 

It cracks me up how some women seem to think that anyone under 6' is "short" - yet that is a good 3 inches taller than average.

 

It is predominantly social conditioning (and ego driven). especially in the USA. Many women from other European countries and the rest of the world, in fact, are not as fixated with height as American women are.

[smackie9]

I don't understand why people get owly about a person being height specific in what attracts them. It is what it is. Just like there are guys who will only date women with bolt on boobs. I am not offended by that at all. Somethings are just dealbreakers for people. Like me I do not like beards. I don't care how hot attractive they are or if they tick off a lot of boxes, I wouldn't be interested. Does that make me a criminal for feeling that way? hell no! so why are people getting all up in arms about how the OP is feeling. Ya all acting like she is discriminating. What attracts you or anyone is a very personal thing. And yes there are going to be women out there who like to date taller men, so what of it.

[JuneJulySeptember]

Sure mate, whatever makes you happy/not triggered

 

I was a little harsh with my post maybe, but c'mon man, take it easy...

 

5'5" guys are extremely short, with emphasis on the extreme? 5'5" guys are a massive outlier? I never see guys like that in real life?

 

Even if a guy is 7'0" or 4'2", they don't like to be reminded that they are massive outliers or have others think of them in that way.

[Gr8fuln2020]

I don't understand why people get owly about a person being height specific in what attracts them. It is what it is. Just like there are guys who will only date women with bolt on boobs. I am not offended by that at all. Somethings are just dealbreakers for people. Like me I do not like beards. I don't care how hot attractive they are or if they tick off a lot of boxes, I wouldn't be interested. Does that make me a criminal for feeling that way? hell no! so why are people getting all up in arms about how the OP is feeling. Ya all acting like she is discriminating. What attracts you or anyone is a very personal thing. And yes there are going to be women out there who like to date taller men, so what of it.

 

I think this discussion regarding height is always interesting and a waste of time. There is no doubt that height is a preference, but when people start throwing in evolution, history, blah, blah that are poor or unfounded reasons for preferring height, it becomes a little contentious and frankly, humorous. It is also odd that some one is incapable of making the decision to date a shorter man (invariably it is the woman who seems to be in turmoil over this) w/o the aid of total strangers. Just do it or not.

 

I'm speaking for myself, but the very title of the thread is absurd. The title suggests that there is something special or foreign about dating shorter men. Lol.

 

Yes, smackie, it is a preference, but please know that if you seek advice as if the subject was somewhat less than normal, you should expect some deeper discussions on the matter.

[JuneJulySeptember]

 

I'm speaking for myself, but the very title of the thread is absurd. The title suggests that there is something special or foreign about dating shorter men. Lol.

 

 

No I agree with you there too.

 

It's pretty bad.

[thefooloftheyear]

 

I wouldn't be attracted to a guy who's mass was smaller than mine, or had less muscle and strength than I do - but otherwise, I certainly don't need a man who towers over me.

 

This is really the heart of the issue, IMO...

 

Two guys can be the same 5'7" and look like two totally different people...

 

For women, I don't really believe it's an issue of short.....It's an issue of small......And because(duh), a good percentage of short guys are in fact, small...that's where there is some resistance...Add to that the fact that women definitely have gotten bigger over the last few decades, I could see how a typical 5'6" 140#(or less) guy would be frowned upon....

 

I do think there is something to the feeling women have expressed about feeling "safe" or "protected" by her man...

 

 

TFY

Edited August 8, 2017 by thefooloftheyear

[Gaeta]

This is really the heart of the issue, IMO...

 

Two guys can be the same 5'7" and look like two totally different people...

 

For women, I don't really believe it's an issue of short.....It's an issue of small......And because(duh), a good percentage of short guys are in fact, small...that's where there is some resistance...Add to that the fact that women definitely have gotten bigger over the last few decades, I could see how a typical 5'6" 140#(or less) guy would be frowned upon....

 

I do think there is something to the feeling women have expressed about feeling "safe" or "protected" by her man...

 

 

TFY

 

It's a lot of this and some more.

 

My ex-h was 5'6'' and 145-lbs, into sports and cut like a boxer. I never felt unsafe. He was very confident and impressive in his military uniform. Our daughter's male friends actually found him intimidating.

 

It's so much more than height and weight.

[Gr8fuln2020]

This is really the heart of the issue, IMO...

 

Two guys can be the same 5'7" and look like two totally different people...

 

For women, I don't really believe it's an issue of short.....It's an issue of small......And because(duh), a good percentage of short guys are in fact, small...that's where there is some resistance...Add to that the fact that women definitely have gotten bigger over the last few decades, I could see how a typical 5'6" 140#(or less) guy would be frowned upon....

 

I do think there is something to the feeling women have expressed about feeling "safe" or "protected" by her man...

 

 

TFY

 

You are now touching into two additional topics that we should steer from. lol. Especially the first, no?

 

The latter point, regarding feeling protected, if this is true, it is not universal. Like I said early, the majority of women around the world are looking or fixated on dating men 6+ inches than themselves for protection. Some women genuinely feel this way, I'll give you that, and many will use that as some biological/evolutionary response (which is unfounded), but believe that that is ego driven and heavily culturally influenced.

[thefooloftheyear]

You are now touching into two additional topics that we should steer from. lol. Especially the first, no?

 

The latter point, regarding feeling protected, if this is true, it is not universal. Like I said early, the majority of women around the world are looking or fixated on dating men 6+ inches than themselves for protection. Some women genuinely feel this way, I'll give you that, and many will use that as some biological/evolutionary response (which is unfounded), but believe that that is ego driven and heavily culturally influenced.

 

I love stacked women ...they drive me nuts......Doesn't mean I haven't been weaned yet,... but there is some biological reasoning for all this stuff...

 

TFY

[Gaeta]

I don't think any of the following are running out of women to date.

 

Bruno Mars - 5'5"

Mark Wahlberg - 5'8"

Kevin Hart - 5'2"

Ed Sheeran - 5'8"Sylvester Stallone - 5'7"

Joe Jonas - 5'7"

Kanye West - 5'8"

Usher - 5'8"

Tom Cruise - 5'7"

Zac Efron - 5'8"

[rushed]

Stop dating him. If height has always been a thing for you, I think this is something that would be hard to overcome.

 

Personally, I like short guys. As a shorty myself (5'3), it's much more comfortable for me to hug and kiss a guy closer to my height. One of my friends who is almost the same height as me, won't go out with a guy shorter than 6'. It's something that's important to her, as I imagine it's important to you.

[SammySammy]

This is really the heart of the issue, IMO...

 

Two guys can be the same 5'7" and look like two totally different people...

 

For women, I don't really believe it's an issue of short.....It's an issue of small......And because(duh), a good percentage of short guys are in fact, small...that's where there is some resistance...Add to that the fact that women definitely have gotten bigger over the last few decades, I could see how a typical 5'6" 140#(or less) guy would be frowned upon....

 

I do think there is something to the feeling women have expressed about feeling "safe" or "protected" by her man...

 

 

TFY

 

I'm not sure being small is an issue either.

 

There are several Asian guys in my photography group. A couple of them seem to weigh 120 pounds or so. 125 at the most. Not athletic at all. Short and skinny. One of these guys has the most beautiful wife in the whole group. Gorgeous woman. The other's wife is no slouch. She's adorable too.

 

I'm thinking height - and weight - only matters if you make it matter. I think being more masculine and muscular can help, but size is only a detriment if you think it's a detriment. There's something to be said about confidence and security also.

[thefooloftheyear]

I'm not sure being small is an issue either.

 

There are several Asian guys in my photography group. A couple of them seem to weigh 120 pounds or so. 125 at the most. Not athletic at all. Short and skinny. One of these guys has the most beautiful wife in the whole group. Gorgeous woman. The other's wife is no slouch. She's adorable too.

 

I'm thinking height - and weight - only matters if you make it matter. I think being more masculine and muscular can help, but size is only a detriment if you think it's a detriment. There's something to be said about confidence and security also.

 

 

No argument....

 

But a 120# guy is gonna be "smaller" than a large percentage of women..Maybe not Asian women, but practically any other....I really can't argue with a woman that says she doesn't want a guy she can pick up and carry up a flight of stairs...It's probably not that appealing to those women, but I am not a woman, just going by what I have experienced over the years..

 

 

 

TFY

[RecentChange]

No argument....

 

But a 120# guy is gonna be "smaller" than a large percentage of women..Maybe not Asian women, but practically any other....I really can't argue with a woman that says she doesn't want a guy she can pick up and carry up a flight of stairs...It's probably not that appealing to those women, but I am not a woman, just going by what I have experienced over the years..

 

 

TFY

 

Hahaha totally. My "limit"? I joke that I am not attracted to men I could beat in wrestling match.

[JuneJulySeptember]

No argument....

 

But a 120# guy is gonna be "smaller" than a large percentage of women..Maybe not Asian women, but practically any other....I really can't argue with a woman that says she doesn't want a guy she can pick up and carry up a flight of stairs...It's probably not that appealing to those women, but I am not a woman, just going by what I have experienced over the years..

 

TFY

 

I think at that point you start going for women who don't look at men as a protector/provider, but as a buddy/mate/companion.

 

That's what I would strongly prefer anyway.

 

Or maybe if you still want the feminine trophy wife, you can still become a senator or filthy wealthy magnate.

[Bastile]

To me, re-framing a discussion about male height into one about male weight is diversion. OP has already said the guy is muscular anyway. So, it's just about other people's projection.

 

Simple fact is that being 5 foot 4 is going to rule you off of some women's F-list. And it's not even that big of a deal. It might be the difference between approaching 15 women instead of 10.

 

It's a magnified issue on the internet, because a lot of guys replying to this thread are 5 foot 3, and I never even saw any man like that whilst I was out today in town. The height discussion is given far too much precedence.

 

In OP's case, it sounds like she found a guy that ticks relationship boxes, but whom she isn't attracted to.

 

Just date the guy for a bit, and see what happens. He's a big boy (if maybe not in height, then in age), and he can handle it if a girl doesn't like him.

Edited August 8, 2017 by Bastile

[basil67]

Just so i can add something to my question, does any of the girls here have any problem with this ? or did u ever cut off someone because of his height ?

 

god no! A man is so much more than his height.

 

Every man I've ever seriously dated has been around my height (170cm/5'7). You ask what it's like to date a guy who's not tall....it's like dating a guy.

[Gr8fuln2020]

I don't think any of the following are running out of women to date.

 

Bruno Mars - 5'5"

Mark Wahlberg - 5'8"

Kevin Hart - 5'2"

Ed Sheeran - 5'8"Sylvester Stallone - 5'7"

Joe Jonas - 5'7"

Kanye West - 5'8"

Usher - 5'8"

Tom Cruise - 5'7"

Zac Efron - 5'8"

 

Including celebrities who make millions of dollars doesn't come close to relating to normal guys.

[5x5]

It's a lot of this and some more.

 

My ex-h was 5'6'' and 145-lbs, into sports and cut like a boxer. I never felt unsafe. He was very confident and impressive in his military uniform. Our daughter's male friends actually found him intimidating.

 

It's so much more than height and weight.

 

Yep.

 

When my now wife (175cm/5'7") asked me out on our first date she weighed 63kg (139lb), and I (162cm/5'3") weighed 58kg (130lb).

 

At the time I could carry 50k-55kg (worth of kit like a rifle, webbing, pack, radio, rations, ammo, helmet etc over a mountain which is something I have done. Likewise I could speed march over varying distances with ease, and had been a machine gunner, infantry instructor, Section Commander (Squad Leader) of a rifle section and a DFSW section commander (machine guns and anti armour "bazooka" type weapons 84mm Carl Gustav's). Plus I had just successfully completed my infantry platoon sergeants course as well. I had also thrown myself out of aeroplanes, abseiled and caved even though my interests tend to be more cerebral and aesthetic than physical.

 

In two of the infantry battalions I served with through the 1990s (I was in Intelligence Corps after that), it was not uncommon to see plenty of short (5'3-5'7") Section Commanders, Platoon Sergeants and even Company Sergeant Majors. One of my mates and former infantry colleagues who is 2cm taller than I (we had the same clothes sizes although my shoulders are broader than his), is currently a CSM in a full-time infantry battalion with multiple deployments on operations behind him.

 

I have a number of other NCO friends and former infantry colleagues who are short that have been in or are in Special Forces with multiple sharp end deployments to East Timor, Iraq and Afghanistan.

 

As it turned out plenty of my short friends from my army service and I never had any trouble attracting pretty women of varying heights or of being considered unmanly.

 

That said one of my 5'6' mates from school who never served in the army, has always had attractive women bedding him and or having long term relationships with him. Some people have that something about them that draws others regardless of their height. One of my 5'2" uncles is also quite the charmer with women, my wife has remarked that both of them have that undefinable "it" that makes them very attractive.

 

Funnily enough my father who is 6'0" is short on his side of the family (my mother is 5'0". I have 6'5"-6'6" male cousins and 6'2" female cousins. One of my taller cousins also served in the army and when he first joined had to wait months for them to supply boots for his very large feet. For him being very tall is sometimes a bit of a nuisance.

 

Yet growing up I always held my own with my cousins and other kids (my best mate from primary school is 6'5" now). I was always sure of myself and confident, perhaps in part because I have always been exceptionally talented at some things. Then as a teenager through to now, it has always been very easy for me to attract female partners. I have been to plenty of parties and clubs where some women readily approach me and ask or offer. This has also happened at work, home and at playdates where I've taken my kids when they were little. So my height has never been a problem for me.

 

That said personality and confidence is a big thing, I am not reticent, nor needy and certainly don't wallow in self doubt. My wife thinks I stand out in a crowd by personality "you seem taller than you are", am quite dominant and have a tendency to lead naturally and easily.

 

At the end of the day though I think there's nothing at all wrong with anyone having a preference for taller sexual partners, especially since I have a preference for taller attractive women myself.

[5x5]

Including celebrities who make millions of dollars doesn't come close to relating to normal guys.

 

I'm shorter than those men, and don't make millions of dollars yet I've never lacked for attractive female suitors.

 

I recall one taller woman who approached me at a bar and asked me what I did for a living, to which I lied to her in reply and told her I was professionally unemployed. Half an hour later we were then having sex.

 

Afterwards on that same night while on the way home using public transport, my mate was chatting up two women who were sitting in front of us. Although I barely said a word to them, when I got off the bus the pretty one ran up to me. Then pressed her phone number on a piece of a paper into my hand and said call me. Two days later I had sex with her at her place after she had taken me out on a date.

[SammySammy]

Yep.

 

When my now wife (175cm/5'7") asked me out on our first date she weighed 63kg (139lb), and I (162cm/5'3") weighed 58kg (130lb).

 

At the time I could carry 50k-55kg (worth of kit like a rifle, webbing, pack, radio, rations, ammo, helmet etc over a mountain which is something I have done. Likewise I could speed march over varying distances with ease, and had been a machine gunner, infantry instructor, Section Commander (Squad Leader) of a rifle section and a DFSW section commander (machine guns and anti armour "bazooka" type weapons 84mm Carl Gustav's). Plus I had just successfully completed my infantry platoon sergeants course as well. I had also thrown myself out of aeroplanes, abseiled and caved even though my interests tend to be more cerebral and aesthetic than physical.

 

In two of the infantry battalions I served with through the 1990s (I was in Intelligence Corps after that), it was not uncommon to see plenty of short (5'3-5'7") Section Commanders, Platoon Sergeants and even Company Sergeant Majors. One of my mates and former infantry colleagues who is 2cm taller than I (we had the same clothes sizes although my shoulders are broader than his), is currently a CSM in a full-time infantry battalion with multiple deployments on operations behind him.

 

I have a number of other NCO friends and former infantry colleagues who are short that have been in or are in Special Forces with multiple sharp end deployments to East Timor, Iraq and Afghanistan.

 

As it turned out plenty of my short friends from my army service and I never had any trouble attracting pretty women of varying heights or of being considered unmanly.

 

That said one of my 5'6' mates from school who never served in the army, has always had attractive women bedding him and or having long term relationships with him. Some people have that something about them that draws others regardless of their height. One of my 5'2" uncles is also quite the charmer with women, my wife has remarked that both of them have that undefinable "it" that makes them very attractive.

 

Funnily enough my father who is 6'0" is short on his side of the family (my mother is 5'0". I have 6'5"-6'6" male cousins and 6'2" female cousins. One of my taller cousins also served in the army and when he first joined had to wait months for them to supply boots for his very large feet. For him being very tall is sometimes a bit of a nuisance.

 

Yet growing up I always held my own with my cousins and other kids (my best mate from primary school is 6'5" now). I was always sure of myself and confident, perhaps in part because I have always been exceptionally talented at some things. Then as a teenager through to now, it has always been very easy for me to attract female partners. I have been to plenty of parties and clubs where some women readily approach me and ask or offer. This has also happened at work, home and at playdates where I've taken my kids when they were little. So my height has never been a problem for me.

 

That said personality and confidence is a big thing, I am not reticent, nor needy and certainly don't wallow in self doubt. My wife thinks I stand out in a crowd by personality "you seem taller than you are", am quite dominant and have a tendency to lead naturally and easily.

 

At the end of the day though I think there's nothing at all wrong with anyone having a preference for taller sexual partners, especially since I have a preference for taller attractive women myself.

 

That's good stuff. I love it.

 

When you think about these guys who struggle with dating, they are always lacking in one of those areas. When we try to tell them to be personable, masculine, confident, and assertive it seems to fall on deaf ears. Only to continue to wallow in self-doubt and self-pity. Looking to blame their situation on height, penis size or some other excuse.

 

You (and so many others) prove them all wrong.

 

You prove that success starts with a positive attitude.

[JuneL]

OP: You either find his height off putting or not. This is a matter of personal taste, and I'm not sure how others can help you make such a personal judgement. My own height is a little above average in the US standard, and I never understand why some short women have this demanding requirement on a man's height.

[mortensorchid]

I'm 5'10". Most people are shorter than me, that includes a lot of guys. Personally I don't mind it if it happens. I've been with guys who are shorter than me. There is kind of a biology thing happening with it, however. It makes others "uncomfortable". I had a great aunt who worked as a nurse for many years, in cases where a tall man and a short woman were having a baby they would literally write "mismatch" on the charts. That's a sort of but not really politically incorrect thing to say now. But it maintains.

 

I think, looking back, that when I have been with a man who is shorter than me it bothered him. The all time tallest guy I was with was 6'7" and he seemed happy in that brief time we were together that I was of appropriate size against him. Then again he said his first girlfriend was 5'1". And I believe today he's married to a girl who is about 5'5". So ... It's what it is.

[toomanyquestions123]

Wow Haha i didnt mean to make a big fuss out of it & I didnt mean to insult anyone baring in mind i am a short human being & it never bothered me & i am fully confident of myself. I agree with some of who said that i am more attracted to taller guys since they give more of a protection & security feeling. The guy however is masculine in all other aspects & I decided to give him a chance. He is now travelling abroad for work 7 he will be coming back after 2 weeks. I will go out with him for several dates & if i couldnt handle this issue I will clearly cut things off & send the guy to the friendzone but i hope this wont happen. Thank you all & I will keep you updated & posted of what will happen.

Edited August 9, 2017 by toomanyquestions123

[basil67]

I think at that point you start going for women who don't look at men as a protector/provider, but as a buddy/mate/companion.

 

Really good point. And it could be why I don't understand the whole thing about women's height preferences. I'm not the kind of woman who wants a protector - I've never needed protecting in my life. I want a companion.