Jump to content

I feel like I'm not doing enough.


Recommended Posts

I've been with my girlfriend now for 2 months and it's been great. We were friends before lovers and we are great together and want the same things for the future.

 

I am the kind of person who will treat her well and make sure she is always happy. I will open doors for her and make sure she has my jacket if it's cold. I buy her thoughtful gifts and generally make her feel wanted and loved. I help her with chores round her house and try to take any pressure off.

 

For some reason though I feel like I need to do more. I kind of feel like I am not showing her how much I love her even though I tell her everyday and show her in my actions. Anyone got any ideas or thoughts on this? Why do I feel like this and what do I need to do? I guess it might be hard to understand but I feel like I could be doing more but I don't know what else I can do.

 

Cheers.

Link to post
Share on other sites
I guess it might be hard to understand but I feel like I could be doing more but I don't know what else I can do.

sometimes you may need to be mean to her and be a little selfish

Link to post
Share on other sites
I've been with my girlfriend now for 2 months and it's been great. We were friends before lovers and we are great together and want the same things for the future.

 

I am the kind of person who will treat her well and make sure she is always happy. I will open doors for her and make sure she has my jacket if it's cold. I buy her thoughtful gifts and generally make her feel wanted and loved. I help her with chores round her house and try to take any pressure off.

 

For some reason though I feel like I need to do more. I kind of feel like I am not showing her how much I love her even though I tell her everyday and show her in my actions. Anyone got any ideas or thoughts on this? Why do I feel like this and what do I need to do? I guess it might be hard to understand but I feel like I could be doing more but I don't know what else I can do.

 

Cheers.

 

Do less for her and more for yourself. Being clingy won't make you (neither her) happy in a long run.

  • Like 4
Link to post
Share on other sites

maybe you're not feeling like it's enough because she's not reciprocating the same amount in return. what does she do for you?

Link to post
Share on other sites

At this point you are doing too much. You are almost smothering.

 

At two months in, there is no reason for you to be buying her multiple presents. A new relationship is about spending time together. It's not about buying the other person's affections.

 

What does she do for you?

  • Like 4
Link to post
Share on other sites

Let her take you shopping with you, make you carry all the bags and wait, ask your opinion as she tries on 50 different outfits, then replies, " Ugh. No. I look pregnant"

 

Idk when I see women do that to their men when I'm out shopping all I can think is how sad but the truest testament of love

 

Bonus points if you go to Sephora with her

Link to post
Share on other sites
somanymistakes

If you always feel like you're not doing enough, that may be coming from a place of your own insecurity and dislike of yourself, that you are trying to compensate for by giving to someone else.

 

But if you give too much, you will overwhelm her. You can actually make your partner feel very uncomfortable if you keep giving and giving. It prevents there from being a healthy balance in the relationship. Partners are supposed to help each other. If you bowl her over doing everything for her, you can actually end up making her feel like she is a useless burden to you.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

She told me I do more than enough to make her happy and she loves the way I am with her. She also does a lot for me its not just a one way street. I know its only been 2 months but we grew up together so it doesn't feel like just 2 months. I really love this girl and want my future to be with her, she wants the same things but sometimes I still feel like what if im not doing enough and she might walk? I think I feel like this because of my last relationship, I was cheated on and lied to a lot.

 

Cheers for the replies :)

Link to post
Share on other sites
She told me I do more than enough to make her happy and she loves the way I am with her. She also does a lot for me its not just a one way street. I know its only been 2 months but we grew up together so it doesn't feel like just 2 months. I really love this girl and want my future to be with her, she wants the same things but sometimes I still feel like what if im not doing enough and she might walk? I think I feel like this because of my last relationship, I was cheated on and lied to a lot.

 

Your lifelong friend / new GF is not your cheating EX. By acting like she is, not trusting her or yourself, you are destined to kill this relationship. If she has already been part of your life since childhood, that is a great deal of evidence that she likes you as a person not just because you do things for her. Being obsequious is highly unattractive, stop. Moreover you can't sustain this initial level of intensity forever & when you stop she will be upset & think the romance is gone.

 

Stop trying to be super BF & try being yourself. If that is not good enough, she's not the girl for you.

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...