how to be sharper ...

[kikie]

I have a really stupid problem - sometimes my bf gets in a bad mood or is annoyed by me - which is ok from time to time, but he starts acting/talking rlly icky ... on the verge of rude. Like he keeps mumbling stuff, and whenever i don't hear, he won't repeat it, and tells me to wash my ears, etc etc ... like i said - on the verge of rude but nothing to get MAD at ... I feel like this could be stopped with one comment next time he does it... Any ideas of what I could say?? Am I being picky and I should just let him be annoyed now n then?

 

Also, I sometimes comment of his hygiene - he'll come to college in the clothes he slept in, w/out a shower or a shave from time to time .... now i understand he was tired, busy, etc., but i still make a comment to show my disliking ... his reaction: stays away from me at least a meter, and when he sees me notice it, he says "it's just so u don't get dirt off such a dirty pig as me" ...

 

Just an example of when i go arrrrg ...

 

Thanks!

[Tony T]

I don't think these are small problems. I think they are very big ones. He was not taught respect or proper hygiene as a child.

 

I think as you continue to see him you will learn more and more reasons why perhaps he isn't the guy of your dreams. Meanwhile, you need to let him know you don't like guys who are moody and who are annoyed easily and you don't like guys who don't think enough of themselves to shower on a regular basis.

 

Don't be a nag about it, just be history if he doesn't comply.

[Ashesmum]

It might be starting as a small problem but it will only lead to bigger ones. If he is annoyed, he should be talking to you about it. The same way for you. Instead, he's mumbling stuff you can't hear just so he can vent. As for the hygiene problem, let him know straight up that you're caring for him but why should he smell? See, he might take it offensive and might think "she should love me for how I am no matter what". But just let him know you'd appreciate it if he'd at least not stink. Tell him it turns you on or whatever it takes. Good luck.

I have a really stupid problem - sometimes my bf gets in a bad mood or is annoyed by me - which is ok from time to time, but he starts acting/talking rlly icky ... on the verge of rude. Like he keeps mumbling stuff, and whenever i don't hear, he won't repeat it, and tells me to wash my ears, etc etc ... like i said - on the verge of rude but nothing to get MAD at ... I feel like this could be stopped with one comment next time he does it... Any ideas of what I could say?? Am I being picky and I should just let him be annoyed now n then? Also, I sometimes comment of his hygiene - he'll come to college in the clothes he slept in, w/out a shower or a shave from time to time .... now i understand he was tired, busy, etc., but i still make a comment to show my disliking ... his reaction: stays away from me at least a meter, and when he sees me notice it, he says "it's just so u don't get dirt off such a dirty pig as me" ... Just an example of when i go arrrrg ... Thanks!

[sparkle]

First of all, one of the most important things I notice in a guy is his level of personal hygiene. If he is unwilling to keep himself CLEAN or properly groomed, that is a big turn-off for me. I have in the past and I would in the future break up with any guy if I don't like his personal hygiene. If you feel the same way and/or it bothers you, you can mention it to him. If he doesn't change, then he's really not worth it.

 

Secondly, don't tolerate rude people. Him being rude isn't the problem. You putting up with his rudeness is the real problem.

 

And next time he does this, say this:

 

Mumble under your breath quickly: "Does ignorance make you deaf?"

 

He won't hear/understand you and will say: "What?"

 

Repeat.

 

Get it??? LOL!!

 

A friend of mine used to say it to me all the time. It drove me crazy. It'll do the same for your bf.

[kikie]

haha

 

cool idea, thanx!

 

it's actually better now - because he said today that he's sorry for being so bad tempered lately, it's cuz of exam stress and lack of sleep, etc. ... I think he means it.