dominant people

[darkmoon]

is it really ok to impose ideas on others? I find unasked for advice to be a sign of dominance, it is one thing when you ask a pro, but another when somebody makes you their project

 

are you an habitual adviser? why do it? what proportion of your advice gets taken?

 

are the regularly advised fed up with being talked down to?

[GemmaUK]

I've been guilty of this sort of thing in the past. I think it is often a guy thing, especially when speaking to women. It is just a misunderstanding. Women often want someone to listen to their problems, but don't necessarily want advice on how to deal with them. Men, on the other hand, we tend to be fixers. We hear a problem, the first thing we think to do is to come up with a solution.

 

If you aren't talking about that specific dynamic, then you're probably just referring to opinionated people. I happen to be one of those as well, in case you hadn't noticed With that said, my friends generally take my advice, if they are in the position to do so. In fact, I am usually the go-to guy when my friends need advice or input about something.

 

Ditto for me too - and it's not a guy thing but I do get tempted to offer advice when it wasn't asked for. 'Most' of the time I manage to stop myself but it can be tricky when someone tells you the exact same problem over and over during a period of months/years.

 

I'm not religious but something I very much dislike is when people try to shove their religion down my throat or tell me I should convert to 'xyz', That really bugs me and has happened often in the past.

[elaine567]

I think most people with a problem are happy receiving advice, but when that advice is not something they want to hear or the advice hits a raw nerve, then that is when the problems start.

[mikeylo]

Unsolicited advise is annoying as hell. It's not being dominant. It's being pushy , poking nose in other people's business and feeling that they know better. There has to be a word for this but it isn't dominant.

 

They usually target weak , pushover people , with poor boundaries.

[thefooloftheyear]

Unsolicited advise is annoying as hell. It's not being dominant. It's being pushy , poking nose in other people's business and feeling that they know better. There has to be a word for this but it isn't dominant.

 

They usually target weak , pushover people , with poor boundaries.

 

I agree...It's really not about dominance....Often times its much deeper...

 

As a guy that is well built, I can't tell you how many out of shape people either tell me what I should do or eat, or tell me that I am "too much of a fanatic"....Really?? Thanks, but Im ok for now....

 

But I practically never say anything to anyone on the street, and don't really care what they do or don't do...The only one's I will say anything to are my loved ones.,.....Because I truly care about them..

 

TFY

[basil67]

I think the right wording can make all the difference when giving advice. Especially use of the word 'should'. There is a great deal of difference between "have you considered doing this?" and "you should do this"

[amaysngrace]

People who like to give their advice should just join an online forum or something.

[preraph]

Most of my friends love the way I am about knowing something about psychology and domestic violence and know that I'm well read and also know that if I don't know about something, I'll tell them. Most of my friends have loved it that I care so much about them that they can talk to me and maybe get some food for thought. I'm not telling them what to do. My underlying message is always simply for them to stand up for themselves and set boundaries. They know I'm in their corner, and they like it or they wouldn't still be here 40 years later. I am their advocate.

 

 

Sometimes a person is dominant because they have made a practice of being better informed.

[don't talk to me]

i hate unasked for advice. and i dont do very well with "strong" personalities, more often than not they are rude and it turns me off. i love discreet people.