If you tell her you can't love her does that get you off the emotional hook?

[jigwig]

Can you [have sex] without emotion? Does telling her you can't love her get you off the emotional hook!

Edited August 23, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
clarify language

[d0nnivain]

If you want NSA sex, find yourself a FWB.

 

Do pretend to have / want a relationship & some kind of emotional attachment to get a women into bed with you.

 

If everybody is on the same page, it's all good. When you have to deceive somebody to get them to have sex with you. . . . you are descending into scum bag territory.

[jigwig]

True...

 

It is deceptive. But so many people use this as a blanket statement as if it's the caviat to ease there conscious because they don't want to be honest and say he I'm not into you. I only want to bang you. FWB is honest.

Edited August 23, 2017 by jigwig

[Bastile]

Can you [have sex] without emotion?

 

No. I'm not a machine.

 

Does telling her you can't love her get you off the emotional hook!

 

I think it's idiotic.

 

From a practical perspective: how do you know that you love anyone before you've been with them a while? There are girls that I could have said this to early, and regretted it later.

 

From a moralistic view: no one is being honest. No one. You think women that are wanting marriage tell you on a first date? Top tip: they usually don't. Instead, they put on a great act. The sex is great, they cook for you, and they feel you out. They navigate it indirect.

 

They constantly filter you among their other options during.

 

I consider myself about as honest as I can possibly be regarding romantic relationships. And I might have tried it all.

 

I've told a woman that I don't love her, in the way you are alluding to. It got me harshly dumped a couple of days later - kicked out of her place one night when I was around there

 

There is a middle ground you know, between doing a weasel seduction of telling her you love her to get her in bed - or being so uncouth as to destroy any potential and/or burn bridges. Being drawn on subjects that you aren't ready to be.

 

I assume that you haven't had much experience with sex outside of exclusive/committed relationships?

 

Good luck telling women (attractive women - you might get away with being so clumsy with women below your league) that you don't love them and want them for sex. Come back and tell how it goes

 

You're likely to destroy some girl's self-esteem, or you'll get dumped.

Edited August 23, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Edit quote

[whatnot]

There is no such thing as FWB. You may be *something* but "friends" you're not.

[Tribble]

There is no such thing as FWB. You may be *something* but "friends" you're not.

 

I suppose that depends on how you define a friend.

[basil67]

Why are you asking the question? Are you considering taking this approach?

[whatnot]

I suppose that depends on how you define a friend.

+1

 

Exactly. That's what makes it such a compelling term. You don't have to define it. It means something different for everyone.

 

So no one has to be the cause of another's pain.

 

Trouble is....it never works out that way. We just wish it could.

 

If you wanna be "honest" and not "pretend"....why not call it something where there's less room for misinterpretation?

 

Like **** buddy. Now we're getting to a place where people understand the meaning and definitions of a term. Less room for error.

 

And in *my* mind....where there's less room for error....there's less room for misunderstandings....and it's *that* that's more honest.

[spiderowl]

It seems some can have sex without emotion but I guess most people feel something, if only that they had sex with the wrong person!

 

Just be honest about emotion. If you know for sure you are not going to fall in love with someone, then tell them. Saying you can't love them could still give them hope. It sounds as though something is stopping you but of course they could convince themselves that situation could change. Basically if someone is going to get attached to you, they probably will regardless of what you say. That does not mean you should lie, only that emotions are not controllable.

 

You should also bear in mind that emotions can sneak up on you too. You can be convinced you will not fall in love with someone because you are not that attracted or something, then a week later it can all change. Then what?

[jigwig]

No matter what we say or do it comes down to perception. Like beauty being in the eyes of the beholder. I've seen just about everything, but what is interesting are those narcissistic manipulative types that manuvef getting their needs met at any cost. They play the victim. Sweet talk their way into your bed only to steal whatever money or dignity that you've got. They genuinely believe they can mesmerize you with their charms. And some actually do.

Edited August 24, 2017 by jigwig