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Last night at a party


mortensorchid

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mortensorchid

I went to a low key party last night, a bunch of people in the backyard chatting around the fire pit and having drinks. I met someone that I had briefly met a few years before. A mutual friend died about five years ago, we met at the funeral and just said "hi how are you" to each other. We'd seen each other at the hostess's parties a few times over the years but we did nothing but make small talk. I said to him when our paths crossed again last night "Oh hi! I haven't seen you in forever!" And he remembered me as well.

 

Also, after said funeral, I asked another mutual friend if he had a gf because I thought he was cute. The mutual friend said yes, he did. So that was that of course ...

 

Now? I don't THINK he has one again. We chatted a bit, I asked if we were Facebook friends. I sent a friend request to him once I confirmed which one he was on Facebook. As I was saying my good-byes last night, he said "How come every time I see you I want to ..." I said "Want to what?" He said "I don't know." I smiled and walked away.

 

So at this moment (I have been checking) he has not accepted the friend request, but he may not live on Facebook like others. Problem? I kind of, like him. And I want him to like me back. What now?

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You can only wait. There is not a whole lot of initiative coming from his side. His statement about you was also rather ambivalent. Let's see if he responds to your Facebook request.

 

I wouldn't get my hope up quite yet. Is there another way of contacting him? If he is like me he doesn't check his Facebook on a regular basis.

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As I was saying my good-byes last night, he said "How come every time I see you I want to ..." I said "Want to what?" He said "I don't know." I smiled and walked away.

 

I would have kept up the playful banter with him to see where he was going with this.

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CautiouslyOptimistic
I would have kept up the playful banter with him to see where he was going with this.

 

lol exactly....OP, why did you walk away?

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If you took time to get his info to send a friend request why didn't you just give him your phone number and tell him it's so he could get in touch to take you out?

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mortensorchid
If you took time to get his info to send a friend request why didn't you just give him your phone number and tell him it's so he could get in touch to take you out?

 

I didn't want to look too eager...

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Pretending is better?

 

Some people still believe that playing mind games is the only road to true love. As if they are starring in our own romantic comedy with happy ending. Call me old fashioned, but I prefer to just communicate on a normal level instead of reading between the lines.

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I kind of, like him. And I want him to like me back. What now?

 

I didn't want to look too eager...

 

Either you want him to like you back or you don't. How you acted makes it look like you don't, so he followed suit.

 

Instead of playing games, try being real.

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mortensorchid

To update all: 3 days later he accepted the friend request. I will play it cool for a few days and ... That may be that.

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To update all: 3 days later he accepted the friend request. I will play it cool for a few days and ... That may be that.

 

oh ffs, message him already....

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To update all: 3 days later he accepted the friend request. I will play it cool for a few days and ... That may be that.

 

translation: how to stay firmly in the friendzone and remain disappointed that he can't read your mind

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  • 2 weeks later...
Ruby Slippers
I didn't want to look too eager...

I used to do this, kind of. Then I read about a survey that said one of men's biggest turn-ons is a woman showing interest. I think as women we often learn to keep our cards very close to our chest, so we don't look over-eager or desperate. Now I make my interest a little bit more clear, and 95% of the time, men are very responsive to this.

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Looks like it ain't gonna happen. Ah well, it's just what it is. No response.
You sent him a message? If so, what did you say?
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  • 1 month later...
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mortensorchid

I sent him an IM on Facebook tonight after many weeks silence and said I was looking to go see a movie on Sunday and maybe he'd want to see Blade Runner with me this weekend. He said no. Ah well, it's what it is.

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I sent him an IM on Facebook tonight after many weeks silence and said I was looking to go see a movie on Sunday and maybe he'd want to see Blade Runner with me this weekend. He said no. Ah well, it's what it is.

 

Well good for you for putting it out there. Ok, the result sucked but at least you are not waiting around hoping he reaches out to you. Better luck next time!

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