I don't know what's next

[Hummingbird92]

The guy i'm talking to....I know he likes me but it seems like he is afraid of letting go and giving in. He was dumped by a girl he really loved months ago like in May and he was devestated. He is going through a rough patch in his life also because his grandfather (who acted as his father) is sick. He comes to visit me a lot at my apartment and I go to his home often as well. I've met his mother, sister and son. He has to go out of town to be with his grandfather in his last days. He should be gone 4-6 months. He visited me recently at my apartment and we talked about him being upset about his grandfather. He had a business trip but he changed his flight so that he could stay later with me. We talked on my couch a lot about his family and his mother. and then took a shower together. Afterwards he took his flight. He Snapchat me when he landed "(:" I sent back a smiley and he said "wryd" I told him what I was doing and he said "miss me?" And I told him yes I miss him and asked if he missed me. He opened it and didn't respond. Then he made up some lie that his ex WHO DUMPED HIM AND MOVED ON MONTHS AGO sent that. Like logged into his Snapchat and sent it. I asked him if I could ask her why she did that and he's like "no I don't need drama". also it was conveniently the time when his flight landed. I didn't believe him and after a few days I told him I knew he was lying and that next time if he's not ready, then don't talk affectionate. He was laid off a week ago and he was DEVASTATED. He cried all day and just slept. He said he felt disappointed because he had just taken this business trip for the company and then they let him go. I asked him recently if I could see him before he goes away with his grandfather and he said "idk maybe I'll let you know". From being around him I can tell he's depressed. His social media post also suggest that he is. He's always posting memes about being sad. He told a guy that we both know that when all of this is over and past him, he wants to work it out with me... but he won't talk hardly and Now he constantly watches my Snapchat stories like CONSTANTLY. All day throughout the day no matter what hes doing he watches everything I post. Within minutes of me posting usually! Which I don't get because he Won't talk to me. Monday is his grandads birthday (also his) and he told me it will be his last birthday with him. They share the same birthday. He opened up to me a lot about his life. But it seems like he shutdown due to depression. I want to be there for him but he isn't letting me. I don't know what to do.

[d0nnivain]

There is nothing you can do. For a lot of very valid reasons: the break up of his relationship; the loss of his job & his grandfather's illness, he's not in the right frame of mind for a relationship.

 

 

Let him go be with his family. He will never get that time back but it will give him peace in years to come.

 

 

If he reaches out to you, listen but don't chase. Assume you will not hear from him.

 

 

When & if he comes back after his grandfather's death, if you are still free to date & if you both want that, you can revisit the issue of having a relationship then but for now, assume it's a non-starter.

[Hummingbird92]

There is nothing you can do. For a lot of very valid reasons: the break up of his relationship; the loss of his job & his grandfather's illness, he's not in the right frame of mind for a relationship.

 

 

Let him go be with his family. He will never get that time back but it will give him peace in years to come.

 

 

If he reaches out to you, listen but don't chase. Assume you will not hear from him.

 

 

When & if he comes back after his grandfather's death, if you are still free to date & if you both want that, you can revisit the issue of having a relationship then but for now, assume it's a non-starter.

 

Thank you! I'll just back off

[Space Ritual]

Thank you! I'll just back off

 

Please do. Someday when you wake up and realize you have more days behind you than ahead of you, you'l be glad you didn't have to not only play rebound, but also a Mother to a needy beta guy.

 

Move forward.