The major downside of being single is...

[Springsummer]

Nobody to go to places with.

 

I want to go camping, other cities for a short weekend trip, other countries for vacations. I won't even go so far as luxuries, such as winter sports. Just normal things.

 

People in the work place often tell what they do with their weekend, long weekend and often work at home on Fridays, and often take vacations.

 

Me? I want to go places. but I can't possibly go camping, ect...on own, right? I still manage though. I went travel to some Asian countires last year. Alone.

 

I am living in a country where there is long weekends every month. God, all people love it, but I don't really know what to do with 3 idle days. I prefer to work, coz as a consultant I can charge them on a working day.

 

lots of long weekends and holidays, and long long winter. OMG...how suck it is for singles?

[Shining One]

I want to go camping, other cities for a short weekend trip, other countries for vacations. I won't even go so far as luxuries, such as winter sports. Just normal things.

I've done more of these things while single than when in a relationship.

I want to go places. but I can't possibly go camping, ect...on own, right?

Why not? Camping alone would be rather boring, but what about all of the other activities? I don't see why a partner is required in order for those things to happen.

[d0nnivain]

You don't need a SO. You can do all that with a friend or group of friends. Even if you go with another coupe who have been together long enough that you aren't an intrusion. A single friend of ours is coming over tonight for a BBQ. Doesn't adversely affect date night with my husband; we both enjoy her company.

 

Also check out groups that travel . . . I was member of a group called single women travel. They even got you a roommate to keep costs down.

[bluefeather]

Nobody to go to places with.

 

I kinda like going places on my own. I'm in control of wherever I want to go or not go. It's pretty nice, especially for someone who is rather introverted like me, and has been in relationships with highly extrovertive women. Now does this mean that I would like to have someone to go out with? At times, yes. But that's what friends are for, and dates too

 

How suck is it for singles? Not much. I also get to flirt with everyone anywhere I go. That is a major upside

[preraph]

Doesn't bother me. I've always gone off and done things on my own since I was a child. As an adult I nearly always travel alone or with dogs. I've found having someone on vacation with me can often put a damper on things and work my nerves.

[grays]

I mostly really enjoy being single. The only time Im really bothered by it is if Im down and/or things are feeling hard. At those times Id really love someone to just put their arms around me and relax into it. Last week I spent two days in the ICU. It would have been really nice to feel like I had someone to lean on through that.

 

The other negative about being single is that I would like someone to grow old with. In my gut, I feel that I will, but its a little scary bc in the three years Ive been single I havent met a single person Id want to do that with and the idea of not eventually having a partner and spending the entire rest of my life single is just not how I want my life to go.

 

Camping tho, I can handle w friends.

[rushed]

I have a friend who did a road trip across the US solo. She camped in places by herself, visited parks, went to a ton of places and saw all kinds of things. All by herself. And she loved it. She would text me and our other friend pictures and tell us about her adventures as she was on them.

 

I have another friend who flies all over the US by himself just to go to sporting events. He also goes to concerts and speaking engagements all by himself.

 

Me? I only like going to movies and sometimes restaurants by myself. Everything else I need someone to go with or I won't go at all. So I feel ya OP. I can't imagine going camping by myself. Just thinking about sitting all by myself in front of a campfire makes me feel lonely. And traveling by myself? No thank you. It doesn't seem as fun without someone to ooh and ahh with as I see new things.

[Cookiesandough]

What about friends?

[K.K.]

I mostly really enjoy being single. The only time Im really bothered by it is if Im down and/or things are feeling hard. At those times Id really love someone to just put their arms around me and relax into it. Last week I spent two days in the ICU. It would have been really nice to feel like I had someone to lean on through that.

 

I can relate to this. Any other time I'm ok being alone. I'm pretty introverted so it works for me. But when I've had an extremely bad day or something bad hits me like an illness or something, I wish I had someone to hold me and say it was going to be ok. It's a scary feeling not having that.

 

The other thing that sucks about being single is having to deal with 'manly things' by myself. Like dealing with my car if it needs maintenance or breaks down. Or fixing things around my apartment. Sometimes wish I had a guy around for that.

 

And let's not forget about not being able to have sex on the regular. I can't do the FWB thing. For one, I have no friends. And two, ewww.

[mikeylo]

If you've been mostly in a relationship then its tough to get used to being alone but if you.ve been single for a while and holding on to finding someone and then doing things, you are wasting your own precious time.

 

Get up and do what you want. Life is short.

[Eternal Sunshine]

Those things don't bother me.

 

I travel either with friends or alone, it's about 50/50. I sometimes travel with my brother and his gf. I enjoy traveling alone quite a bit.

 

When I have a ****ty day or am sick, I call up my mum. She is always there for me. Even when I was in serious relationships, I never really had men that cared that much to support me. That made me feel more alone than being single ever did.

 

As for long weekends, there are so many activities and meet-up groups you could try. Depending on what mood I am in, sometimes I enjoy spending the long weekend by myself, doing nothing.

[BluEyeL]

I think it could be different things for different people but for me the biggest downside was being lonely.

 

Traveling and doing things I always found someone to do that with. I have friends whom I travel very well with. Another "downside " could be feeling out of place if most of your circle is composed of married people. It's a longing to have someone to share things with , even mundane things, when you look at those couples. I know not all are happy but I couldn't help feeling that way. In response to that I started working on making more single friends and distanced from those married.

[Otter2569]

I have traveled more and have had so many more good times being single than being married. Honesty I would never go back.

 

The only down side for me was losing my married "friends" (if they were really fiends we would still keep in contact but we don't) and occasionally finding someone to hang out with.

 

Well worth the trade off

[carhill]

At my age, there aren't many downsides from my perspective, save for a glaring one that the hospital won't release me from certain things without a carer/transport. As example, anything requiring a general anesthetic, even if not invasive, like a routine colonoscopy. Hence the Uber driver becomes a trusted relative.

 

However, I think that people in general who are used to being on their own and not depending on another person or people adjust to that lifestyle just like those who are surrounded by helpers or are with a partner. Each style has its benefits and costs. I've done the gamut and, whenever I get the hankering to play the game again, a line spoken by my exW when I was in the throes of caregiving always rings in my ears...

What do you want me to do about it? (as an explanation for doing nothing/caring not)

 

Thanks, I'll lie and drive myself home from the hospital.

[GemmaUK]

I'll let you know when I find one.

 

I could say lack of sex but in my last few experiences the guys have been so bad at it that no sex is better than awful sex where you realise or they flat out tell you that sex isn't for women to enjoy and is just for men.

 

I seem to attract well endowed men who believe that size is all that matters.

Not so great when they don't see foreplay as important and sex hurts like hell. Of course, they 'say' they are all into sex and foreplay etc. before it happens but then the reality becomes clear, you hope things will improve and then realise they're just lazy and unimaginative.

 

I prefer average who listens and takes the time to give what I like a go rather than do what his last ex liked.

 

I always listen, ask and am more than happy to follow instructions btw.

Always have, always will. No two men are the same, they like different things and I don't 'forget' that the next time we hit the sack.

 

A healthy, fun sex life is important to me as part of a relationship.

 

A hug at the end of a bad day would be nice but if it means I have to endure a terrible sex life then I can do without that hug.

[Els]

Lots of people do all the things that you mention in your opening post alone.

 

Why not join groups for the things that you enjoy, and spend your long weekends with them? Might meet someone, too... But at the very least, if solo travel/etc isn't your thing (I personally enjoyed solo travel when I did it, but each to their own), you'd be having fun with them.

 

There ARE some things you should do with a friend/group for safety reasons, like hiking in the wilderness.

[Springsummer]

Thank you all for giving me the perspectives. Now I feel better being single. The pasture ain't necessary greener:)

[Springsummer]

What about friends?

 

I am an immigrant. I don't have alot of local friends. Now, that's not really a good excuse. I know some people who know a lot more people even being a much newer immigrant. but, still it could be an excuse.

 

I used to make a few friends, then at the end, they either went back to their countries or moved to other provinces.

 

People I met at work, most are married, they can't wait to go back home, no time for me. or very young people, like I mentioned in another thread, not friend either:(

[Springsummer]

I've done more of these things while single than when in a relationship.Why not? Camping alone would be rather boring, but what about all of the other activities? I don't see why a partner is required in order for those things to happen.

 

I have been single like forever. so yeh, I did all those things alone too, except camping.

 

I am tired of doing things alone now.

[Springsummer]

I have a friend who did a road trip across the US solo. She camped in places by herself, visited parks, went to a ton of places and saw all kinds of things. All by herself. And she loved it. She would text me and our other friend pictures and tell us about her adventures as she was on them.

.

 

2 years ago, I did a road trip around 3 eastern Canadian provinces all by myself. I camped and did airbnb. I must look like the most weird person on the planet. camped alone in campsites while others all camped with companies.

[Springsummer]

What do you want me to do about it? (as an explanation for doing nothing/caring not)

 

Thanks, I'll lie and drive myself home from the hospital.

 

yes, it could feel more lonely when you have an uncaring partner.

[SammySammy]

Being single is liberating to me. An opportunity to do what I want when I want.

 

I could definitely go camping by myself. But, camping to me would involve a cabin or a travel trailer or some sort. I'm not into sleeping on the ground. Take my fishing equipment and camera and have a great time.

 

Being a woman is no hindrance either. My sisters and sisters-in-law go places by themselves all the time. Just take the necessary precaution and go!

[Els]

I am an immigrant. I don't have alot of local friends. Now, that's not really a good excuse. I know some people who know a lot more people even being a much newer immigrant. but, still it could be an excuse.

 

I used to make a few friends, then at the end, they either went back to their countries or moved to other provinces.

 

People I met at work, most are married, they can't wait to go back home, no time for me. or very young people, like I mentioned in another thread, not friend either:(

 

It is certainly harder to make friends as an immigrant. You aren't just starting from scratch, there is also a cultural barrier that can often make things more difficult. When I was an immigrant in grad school, it did take me a lot longer to make friends there than it did in my home country, simply because the things that the most common social activities in the new country did not appeal to me - they mostly either centered around drinking, or rather hardcore outdoor activities like multi-day hikes. I don't mind the occasional drink with dinner or a one-hour hike, but it's hard for me to get excited over spending an entire night drinking or an entire weekend hiking.

 

I did eventually find some friends, though. You just have to put a bit more effort into finding like-minded people than you otherwise would.

[Mysterio]

For me. The only downside is the lack of physical affection. Other than that. I get to call the shots.

[preraph]

I have the perfect solution for the original poster: Buy a motorcycle. Number 1, that's one way I ended up doing things on my own. I had a scooter at 12 and would drive 5 miles to the lake club and go have a sundae by myself. Being by yourself is normal on a motorcycle.

 

Number 2, you can always join a motorcycle club and, voila, suddenly you have all the camping buddies you need. But one word of caution, join a club. For that, you'll need a recommendation of which one to join so you don't end up pulling a biker gang train. So if it were me, I'd ask the local police station or fire station, Who are the nice motorcycle clubs you'd let your daughter join?