Jamie_1 Posted September 4, 2017 Share Posted September 4, 2017 Cutting to the chase. I matched with someone on bumble that is way out of my league, we exchanged messages for little while and eventually found out that we will be on the same uni course, which starts in about a week. How much contact should I try and keep with her before we go to uni and how forward should I be when we meet at uni? I'm hoping we'll both like each other when we meet, but I'm trying to workout how to navigate this situation. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted September 4, 2017 Share Posted September 4, 2017 Don't ever smother anyone. If all you're doing is texting her all day and night, she knows you for sure don't have a life. Remember this word: Moderation. And wait until and unless you have something interesting to say before you text people. Like "I see they have a new baby hippo at the zoo there!" Not "Whasup?" 1 Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted September 4, 2017 Share Posted September 4, 2017 Strike while the iron is hot, man! One of the advantages of meeting online is that the context is automatically set... dating. If you wait until school to meet her that context will probably be lost. There will be a million distractions, other guys, girlfriends, classes, clubs, etc. But right now you could ask her out for a drink or a meal or some activity and you'll have her all to yourself, in the context of a date. There's no guarantee, of course, but it sure beats trying to get her attention during the first week of school. And if you text a lot before then and don't meet, you'll be old news. You need to get her out and show her a good time while you've got her attention, and make it a date, not a hangout. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jamie_1 Posted September 4, 2017 Author Share Posted September 4, 2017 Strike while the iron is hot, man! One of the advantages of meeting online is that the context is automatically set... dating. If you wait until school to meet her that context will probably be lost. There will be a million distractions, other guys, girlfriends, classes, clubs, etc. But right now you could ask her out for a drink or a meal or some activity and you'll have her all to yourself, in the context of a date. There's no guarantee, of course, but it sure beats trying to get her attention during the first week of school. And if you text a lot before then and don't meet, you'll be old news. You need to get her out and show her a good time while you've got her attention, and make it a date, not a hangout. I asked out for a coffee and she said that she'd love to go, but wouldn't be sure when she would be able to. I replied with "that's cool, whenever you're able to" and I didn't probe any further. Not sure what to make of that. We live about a mile and a half away from each other and about a mile and a half from the city centre. Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted September 4, 2017 Share Posted September 4, 2017 I asked out for a coffee and she said that she'd love to go, but wouldn't be sure when she would be able to. I replied with "that's cool, whenever you're able to" and I didn't probe any further. Not sure what to make of that. We live about a mile and a half away from each other and about a mile and a half from the city centre. Eh, she's playing games. Ask her, once, for a specific day and time. If she won't commit then forget it and find yourself another girl to date when you get to school. Don't let her hold you at arm's length. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
StormyEyes Posted September 12, 2017 Share Posted September 12, 2017 Ask for a specific date, time, and place. If she can't make it and doesn't offer an alternative, I will agree with Sal. You will have much more success dating if you actually set a date. That seems to be a common problem these days. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ZA Dater Posted September 14, 2017 Share Posted September 14, 2017 May advice: don't over think. Link to post Share on other sites
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