CMC1221 Posted September 4, 2017 Share Posted September 4, 2017 Hey guys, New here. I just wanted some honest opinions. So I went out of state for the weekend and we hung out last Thursday and I haven't seen my boyfriend obviously all weekend and I came back today and we agreed to hang out and it seemed to me like it was going to be our day to hang out because I was coming home and all that. He got to hang out w the guys all weekend and I got to hang out w the girls all weekend and t seemed like he wanted today to be our day to hang out so when I almost get home he tells me so and so (one of his friends) is coming over and I got pretty upset with him because I assumed it was our day to hang out and have quality time. Do you other girls get upset w your SO over this? Or am I overreacting? Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted September 6, 2017 Share Posted September 6, 2017 It's only a few days without each other. While I can understand your disappointment, I think that getting "pretty upset" over it is an over reaction. Unless him blowing you off is a recurring theme in your relationship, it would be wise to let it slide without saying anything. Learn to choose your battles. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
The Urbanyst Posted September 6, 2017 Share Posted September 6, 2017 Never "assume" anything. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author CMC1221 Posted September 7, 2017 Author Share Posted September 7, 2017 Never "assume" anything. So should I be the one to always say "I want date night w just you?" It just bugs me that he never wants to initiate a date night. If one of his friends calls us up he usually says "yeah we can hang out" but he always has guys nights. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted September 7, 2017 Share Posted September 7, 2017 I never "hung out" with guys I was dating. Hanging out is for friends of FWBs. Dates are for romance. If the guy couldn't be bothered to arrange a date, I couldn't be bothered to be around when it was convenient for him. You need to tell your BF some of what you told us: that you would like him to plan dates & you feel like his friends rank above you in his life priorities. If he can't plan a date & you continue to feel like second fiddle to the buddies, perhaps it's time to get more attentive new BF 2 Link to post Share on other sites
nospam99 Posted September 7, 2017 Share Posted September 7, 2017 I'm missing the vocabulary here. To me 'hang out' is any kind of being together. It may be considered a date or not. It's casual. It could be at her place, my place, a large or small party at a friends' place, or out somewhere like a club, park, or theater. AND it could include several friends. On the other hand a 'planned date' is either she or I go(es) to a bit of trouble: picking a venue, making arrangements, advising their partner if there are any considerations about how to dress. It might be casual but could be semi-formal or even formal. I thought the OP had an issue about a hanging out situation and I missed any reference on her part to a planned date. Link to post Share on other sites
Methodical Posted September 7, 2017 Share Posted September 7, 2017 On one hand, you say it seemed like he wanted it to be an exclusive day. On the other hand, you say you assumed. Maybe you wanted him to feel/think the same as you, so you projected and expected, and now you are miffed bc you weren't on the same page. I think you are over reacting since your plans weren't clearly defined. Chalk it up to a lesson learned. Be more specific in the future. Link to post Share on other sites
The Urbanyst Posted September 7, 2017 Share Posted September 7, 2017 So should I be the one to always say "I want date night w just you?" It just bugs me that he never wants to initiate a date night. If one of his friends calls us up he usually says "yeah we can hang out" but he always has guys nights. Because his friends tell him what they want and you don't. Do the math lol. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle ma Belle Posted September 7, 2017 Share Posted September 7, 2017 Because his friends tell him what they want and you don't. Do the math lol. Worth a repost. Girls...take notes. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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