How unattractive is a girl or guy in their 20s living with a roommate?

[Cookiesandough]

How many points off is it when you are dating someone and they have to ask their roommate to leave every time they want privacy with you at their place and that can't be all the time ?

[No_Go]

Fine with me - we can always go to my house.

 

When I was living with roommates before, we'll go to the guys house. No problems again.

[SwordofFlame]

20s with roommates is the norm for high cost of living cities like NYC. You have to be doing pretty well financially or living somewhere not so convenient to not have roommates.

[normal person]

I don't really care because I have my own place and I live in the middle of the city. It's usually just unstated that girls I'm dating would much rather come here than have to let me deal with their weird roommate(s), travel out to the unsafe, far, reaches of some other borough, or both. It's easier for everyone -- I'm happy I don't have to travel, and they're happy I don't have to see how they live.

 

I think if you're a woman, it's hard to imagine a guy looking down on you for having inconvenient living conditions. But if you're a guy, it's probably harder to win someone over if she's going to have to ride 40 minutes on a subway through the bad part of town, or constantly deal with your roommate who's always coming home at 4:30 am, passing out, and not throwing away his Chinese food. I can deal with a girl under 28 who has roommates provided they don't share a bedroom. But my time's valuable, I'm definitely thinking twice if she lives across a river or north of 125th Street.

 

But most men won't care. They're probably just happy to be alone with you when they can.

 

 

20s with roommates is the norm for high cost of living cities like NYC. You have to be doing pretty well financially or living somewhere not so convenient to not have roommates.

 

Yeah, the culture is different in different cities. In San Francisco, New York, Seattle (I think), etc it's pretty rare for a single person not to have roommates in their 20s. Just to rent a bare bones studio in a nice part of town you need to make $80K+ minimum. Most people in their early to mid 20s aren't making that much yet.

[basil67]

I've shared places with flatmates before. And we'd have sex in the bedroom with the door closed. Yes, the sex was quieter, but it wasn't a big deal. Not sure why people need a hotel or to go somewhere else.

[grays]

I dont care. My main guy has a roommate. We've stayed at his place a couple of times when hes been away but are usually at my place bc i live alone (half time, when my kids arent here).

[The Urbanyst]

I know people in their 30's 40's and 50's who have roommates. Its not 1950 anymore lol.

 

I live alone because I can afford it and I like privacy. But its not to impress others. Roommates are definitely cheaper.

[thefooloftheyear]

It's kind of a boner killer.....for me, anyway...I've always been the type that likes my own space....Even the thought of sharing a bathroom daily with a relative stranger kind of skeeves me ..When I have gone on business trips with other guys they would be fine with two to hotel room, as long as their were two beds,..Not for me..I always got my own room..I know, i am weird..

 

I wouldn't be critical of someone for it, but Id avoid their place...And I think mature people probably should have their own digs, but for most 20 something's its kind or S-O-P...

 

TFY

[clia]

I generally wouldn't have a problem with a roommate in your 20s, but I think it also depends on the living situation. If they have one roommate, aren't sharing a bathroom, and the roommate has a busy enough life of their own that they aren't around all the time, it's not a big deal. On the other hand, if they are living with multiple people, sharing a bathroom, and constantly having a roommate sitting right in your face it isn't ideal, especially as you get into the mid and late 20s.

[d0nnivain]

How many points off is it when you are dating someone and they have to ask their roommate to leave every time they want privacy with you at their place and that can't be all the time ?

 

2 or more people sharing a 1 bedroom apartment -- like in college -- would be a problem for me.

 

2 people in a 2 bedroom apartment is no big deal.

 

It wouldn't be points off. But it would present logistical challenges.

 

Living with a roommate is still better than mooching off parents.

[RecentChange]

Yeah wait, are we talking roommates as in actually share a bedroom, or house mates?

 

I am in San Francisco, all twenty something have roommates, often many of them!!

 

But when I say roommates, I mean house mates.

 

House mates, no problem, as privacy isn't an issue - private bedroom.

 

Sharing a bedroom would be a buzz kill for me, unless going to my place was a good option.

[road]

To me having a roommate shows a person

that wants to live where they cannot afford

too.

 

Almost like being a cake eater.

[Frostedflake]

I never found an issue with it. I'm actually terrified of people who have already bought houses because it usually means they expect you to adapt to them because they have that obligation.

In my experience, they've always had respectful roommates too and were very easy to befriend and get along with.

 

I guess it depends on the situation and reasons they would need a roomie such as living in an expensive city or going to school.

[Els]

Are we talking about a roommate (literally sharing a room) or a flatmate (different rooms, same flat/house/apartment)?

 

I would hesitate with the former, but the latter in their 20s is no big deal IMO. It's actually very normal for cities with a higher cost of living. If they were in their 30s and above it might be more of a concern, but not 20s.

[Eternal Sunshine]

For a guy that's 30+ I am turned off if he lives with housemates. Just gives me an all around loserly vibe. I live in an area where housing is decently priced so it's not like SF or NYC.