I ended affair and sent him an Invoice

[GirlofSpain]

I have come to the end of an affair. I never believed for once I would have gotten involved in one and continued after learning he was married. I recently broke it off. We have been quarreling recently because of our different outlooks and his hot and cold behavior.

 

The last straw was him telling me this was not an affair when I mentioned it in a sentence. I was taken back a little. I thought, wow, not even an affair you say. I broke it off via email the next day. He had been on another cold run. I have confidence and am self assured that I do not need to continue placing myself in such a intensely degrading situation.

 

I sent him a professional Invoice today charging him for my *Non Affair Sex Services. He can make them in monthly payment. I let him know the few thousand charged was a bargain sale compared to how long we have been together.

 

I have been really depressed and in alot of pain lately and for the life of me this act: SET ME FREE! I feel vindicated and better after doing this.

[K.K.]

Ummm I think that's illegal.

[GirlofSpain]

He can make it illegal if he wants to, but he won't. There would not be a judge who would take it seriously when there are so many factors involved. I know and have socialized with a few in my town. The case is a non case and his lawyer would advise him of how much he would have to expose in a public forum if he was dumb enough to pursue.

 

It made me feel fantastic and that is what counts. I am through with deception and pain. I would feel even better if he pays up. I am okay with it if he doesn't because i do not need his money.

[Starswillshine]

What kind of services can you charge?

[GirlofSpain]

What kind of services can you charge?

 

I charge him as a working girl. I charged him as he seemed to last describe our relations. This is my way to turn my pain into indifference. I do not care for him anymore when I once did. I really sat and thought in a realistic realm last night and I did not like who I saw---that was ME! How awful I was to be in this relationship. My soul cracked.

[Starswillshine]

I charge him as a working girl. I charged him as he seemed to last describe our relations. This is my way to turn my pain into indifference. I do not care for him anymore when I once did. I really sat and thought in a realistic realm last night and I did not like who I saw---that was ME! How awful I was to be in this relationship. My soul cracked.

Hugs. Crappy situation to be in. Cheaters are usually pretty skilled manipulators. It's sad. I don't know how they can lie so easily just to get whatever it is that they want. They lie to OW they lie to the BW. It is all about them.

[ItStartsFromWithin]

The case is a non case and his lawyer would advise him of how much he would have to expose in a public forum if he was dumb enough to pursue.

 

 

Good on you, for seeing the light, and getting out of an unhealthy affair. You made the very best decision by ending it & walking away with your dignity.

 

However, I must say,* I'm quite puzzled as to why, exactly, you would want to bring about this lawsuit on him?* It could carry just as, much & just as many; damaging repercussions unto you as it would have on MM.

 

You would have to prove that the 'relations' between you and MM were not based on a consensual LT affair, but rather, a "sex for hire" agreement, which is prostitution, which is illegal.

 

Which means you would have to lie under oath, that there was an agreement between you two, to exchange sex for money. But since the truth is--that this was an affair, not a 'sex for hire' contractual agreement, you would be committing perjury. Your post here, on this very forum, is indicative of this fact.

 

How in the world could you prove this lie in court? You have zero proof that these relations were not that of a consensual affair; but were an exchange of services for monetary gain.

 

Your inconsistencies coupled with lack of proof, not to mention your post here on LS forum, would most likely be proven that your case is fraudulent, fairly quickly. Then begins the real fun of possible perjury charges, counterclaims, personal lawsuits, etc. {(As a side note I wonder if IRS Taxing- as income gain would be pursued? Or how that would even work: in a case such as this?)( I'm getting off course here)}

Anyways...

 

Then once it was already out in the open and you were exposed as a liar, possibly charged with perjury for swearing under oath in the court of law, not only could you face legal repercussions but then MM could turn around and sue you for blackmail, defamation, exhortation, or any other charge he can throw out there, hoping atleast one would stick. Because once his dirty laundry is aired out & the affair is out in the open, he has nothing left to lose, & would most likely vehemently pursue you, in any & all types of legal retribution in retaliatation against you, that he could. Not to mention turn around and air your dirty laundry out to every single person in your life as well as every social networking site to the world.

 

I get that you are in emotional pain. You feel used and betrayed by what he classified your affair as. You feel that he hurt your feelings with his words so you will hurt him with his wallet but the fact of the matter is this; MM(Married Man) did NOT hold a knife against your throat or a gun to your head, to force you into this affair. He did not contractually hire you for sex. You willingly consented and if older than the average teenager; you know that affairs are unhealthy, possibly destructive and almost always messy; in one form or another.

 

 

You both engaged in the affair, you two, were both consenting adults; who jointly decided to get involved into an affair, with all of it's highs, of intimacy and powerful emotions, as a show of desire, lust, & passion for one another. But, as it is, with most affairs, with the highs comes the lows.* The heartwrenching pain, emotional turmoil and the eventual end to the affair. You knew this was coming. You knew the odds were stacked against you, but you still insisted on engaging in the affair with him. You were both a part of this affair, willingly, so do you really think it equitable, to then turn around and sue him- lying on top of it?

 

Think about the possible backfire and repercussions, that you yourself face: to your: future employment, friends, family, and colleagues, if any of this does get out? I mean, would you tell your parents, siblings,* friends, boss, &

co-workers* that you moonlighted as a prostitute all this time?

 

I would think real long & hard before continuing on, in,* persuing this lawsuit endeavor. But, whichever, way you decide to take, Good luck.

[lostgirl87]

Good on you, for seeing the light, and getting out of an unhealthy affair. You made the very best decision by ending it & walking away with your dignity.

 

However, I must say,* I'm quite puzzled as to why, exactly, you would want to bring about this lawsuit on him?* It could carry just as, much & just as many; damaging repercussions unto you as it would have on MM.

 

You would have to prove that the 'relations' between you and MM were not based on a consensual LT affair, but rather, a "sex for hire" agreement, which is prostitution, which is illegal.

 

Which means you would have to lie under oath, that there was an agreement between you two, to exchange sex for money. But since the truth is--that this was an affair, not a 'sex for hire' contractual agreement, you would be committing perjury. Your post here, on this very forum, is indicative of this fact.

 

How in the world could you prove this lie in court? You have zero proof that these relations were not that of a consensual affair; but were an exchange of services for monetary gain.

 

Your inconsistencies coupled with lack of proof, not to mention your post here on LS forum, would most likely be proven that your case is fraudulent, fairly quickly. Then begins the real fun of possible perjury charges, counterclaims, personal lawsuits, etc. {(As a side note I wonder if IRS Taxing- as income gain would be pursued? Or how that would even work: in a case such as this?)( I'm getting off course here)}

Anyways...

 

Then once it was already out in the open and you were exposed as a liar, possibly charged with perjury for swearing under oath in the court of law, not only could you face legal repercussions but then MM could turn around and sue you for blackmail, defamation, exhortation, or any other charge he can throw out there, hoping atleast one would stick. Because once his dirty laundry is aired out & the affair is out in the open, he has nothing left to lose, & would most likely vehemently pursue you, in any & all types of legal retribution in retaliatation against you, that he could. Not to mention turn around and air your dirty laundry out to every single person in your life as well as every social networking site to the world.

 

I get that you are in emotional pain. You feel used and betrayed by what he classified your affair as. You feel that he hurt your feelings with his words so you will hurt him with his wallet but the fact of the matter is this; MM(Married Man) did NOT hold a knife against your throat or a gun to your head, to force you into this affair. He did not contractually hire you for sex. You willingly consented and if older than the average teenager; you know that affairs are unhealthy, possibly destructive and almost always messy; in one form or another.

 

 

You both engaged in the affair, you two, were both consenting adults; who jointly decided to get involved into an affair, with all of it's highs, of intimacy and powerful emotions, as a show of desire, lust, & passion for one another. But, as it is, with most affairs, with the highs comes the lows.* The heartwrenching pain, emotional turmoil and the eventual end to the affair. You knew this was coming. You knew the odds were stacked against you, but you still insisted on engaging in the affair with him. You were both a part of this affair, willingly, so do you really think it equitable, to then turn around and sue him- lying on top of it?

 

Think about the possible backfire and repercussions, that you yourself face: to your: future employment, friends, family, and colleagues, if any of this does get out? I mean, would you tell your parents, siblings,* friends, boss, &

co-workers* that you moonlighted as a prostitute all this time?

 

I would think real long & hard before continuing on, in,* persuing this lawsuit endeavor. But, whichever, way you decide to take, Good luck.

Did I misunderstand? I thought the invoice was sent as a "joke" since he said their relationship wasn't an affair. Am I just dumb? Lol

[GorillaTheater]

Did I misunderstand? I thought the invoice was sent as a "joke" since he said their relationship wasn't an affair. Am I just dumb? Lol

 

 

No, you're right. Someone just got confused.

 

 

I thought it was pretty funny.

[elaine567]

I don't think the OP is going to court, she was refuting Darkmoon's assertion that it was "illegal" for her to bill her MM for sex services rendered, and if her MM was going to take her to court over the "illegalness" of the invoice, it would be highly unsuccessful as he would have much more to lose in an open court.

I agree with lostgirl, I thought the invoice was a "joke" over the fact he did not even think they were in an affair and was implying she was little more than a "working girl" providing him with sex.

[BaileyB]

I love it, personally.

 

You are taking back your power. Good on you!

[RecentChange]

Affairs are exchanges.

 

Maybe it's just sex for sex.

 

Or sex for attention and affirmative

 

Or ego boosting for support

 

I could go on and on. Sometimes, well often times the exchanges are not even.... But they are there.

 

He didn't offer money for sex, so what was it that he offered that made you give sex, if you weren't in it for the sex as well?

[GirlofSpain]

Did I misunderstand? I thought the invoice was sent as a "joke" since he said their relationship wasn't an affair. Am I just dumb? Lol

 

Yes, more of a pseudo quasi slap in the face, although I doubt he will be bothered by it, unless he makes it all about himself. No, you are not dumb. My first thought was, "boy he must be a load of fun at dinner parties!" (A bit too dramatic for me)

 

It was an invoice sent through email. I did not go down to the courthouse and fill out paperwork, so your entire soap opera of what will never happen was strange and then some.

[elaine567]

He didn't offer money for sex, so what was it that he offered that made you give sex, if you weren't in it for the sex as well?

 

I guess she felt he was offering love or the future promise of love, or even eventually monogamy...

That is often why women are in affairs with MM and why many get sorely disappointed just like in this case.

She was in it for "more", he was in it for "fun".

[GirlofSpain]

Affairs are exchanges.

 

Maybe it's just sex for sex.

 

Or sex for attention and affirmative

 

Or ego boosting for support

 

I could go on and on. Sometimes, well often times the exchanges are not even.... But they are there.

 

He didn't offer money for sex, so what was it that he offered that made you give sex, if you weren't in it for the sex as well?

 

I do not wish to be vague, but I am over it and still have more pain and torturing myself to do, so I do not want to rehash the affair. I want to forget it, the details. It was an affair. Over a long course, I have come to realize I do not know who this person is reflecting back from the mirror? It was a reflection I did not respect or admire. I always became wide eyed and horrified when hearing of another's affair, but here i was....

I also know he does not care as long as he is doing well. He is the great pretender.

[GirlofSpain]

I guess she felt he was offering love or the future promise of love, or even eventually monogamy...

That is often why women are in affairs with MM and why many get sorely disappointed just like in this case.

She was in it for "more", he was in it for "fun".

 

He would have us both until I was well into my 90s if he could. He loves his wife and wants the fantasy OW to do whatever it is they do in their minds. Love, hate, want, not want. In the end, it will only lead to devastation and pain for many.