A friend Posted May 14, 2001 Share Posted May 14, 2001 I have read past posts on how to go about in starting over in a relationship that has been tainted by a one time infedility. But now I need advice on what to say to a close friend of mine who is experiencing these mixed feelings. I know some might say to forget it and move on, but what if she is in complete awe of him and feels for him truly in her heart ?? He has come back into her life after a seven month absence and has proven himself in regards to his sincerity and what he feels for the future. He has respected her by not inconveniencing her life after their turmoil. They both have dated other people, but have not been able to forget each other. And now he is yearning to start over with her. And honestly, I believe he is being sincere with his feelings towards her and wants a second chance. I also believe they can be 100 times stronger than before, especially because they have been talking for a month now and have put all their issues "out on the table". She tells me that she loves him , but feels confused about how to allow her heart to win the battle against her brain. According to her he was her best friend and lover and was the best boyfriend she has ever had. His issue was about how he felt she never gave him a chance to win her heart because of her past relationship. You see, in her first relationship her x had another woman for two years behind her back. One of the problems they had was how he felt, because of her past, that she at times was cold hearted and how she was nonchalant about the relationship. She has admitted to her lacking and that's why she's still talking to him, but he did hurt her. He was insecure about her feelings towards him.When they are together, they are extremely powerful. I couldn't believe they had problems because they were perfect together. She says that as much as she loves him, she wants to make sure that this is for real because if she takes him back, it's forever. They're both 28 years old. I believe that they belong together. I need advice on what to say to her to make her realize that all she has to do is move forward and utilize the will to forget...start anew. What do I say to her about her confusion?? I believe this specific relationship can be saved or else I would tell her to forget it. He was a great guy who protected himself the wrong way and has learned from his mistakes. She believes he's being sincere so what can I tell her to provide her with some focus ??? I appreciate any strong and mature advice. Thanks for listening... Just a friend... Link to post Share on other sites
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