(Article) The changing reasons why women cheat

[Logo]

What’s your opinion about this article?

The changing reasons why women cheat on their husbands - CNN

[KBob]

My opinion is that this is proof that one should never settle and never stop putting effort into their relationships. From what it sounds like to me, the author's friends have passionless, dull, swamps of a relationship and they justify their unhappiness and infidelity by claiming it keeps a functional household. To me, a household is not functional if it's built of a web of lies and deceit. If you want to get down with the boom boom, fine, have at it, but do it in an open relationship where families will not potentially get hurt and households broken.

[Logo]

My opinion is that this is proof that one should never settle and never stop putting effort into their relationships. From what it sounds like to me, the author's friends have passionless, dull, swamps of a relationship and they justify their unhappiness and infidelity by claiming it keeps a functional household. To me, a household is not functional if it's built of a web of lies and deceit. If you want to get down with the boom boom, fine, have at it, but do it in an open relationship where families will not potentially get hurt and households broken.

 

 

My thoughts exactly.

[Steve51]

I agree with most of the article having read it before. My marriage was not monogamous most of the time. My had a girlfriend for 30 years but shared her with me. It was great to have a secondary relationship with someone very different than your spouse. We lucked out in that our girlfriend was able to fill the wants and needs we could not fill for each other. First of all, I do not have a vagina.

 

We always put our marriage ahead of all else, even monogamy. This month we celebrate our 45th wedding anniversary and we have had a great marriage. Our small petty differences seem insignificant compared to what I read here. I am not kidding when I say that we never had an argument due to our lifestyle. Those who condemned us for our Poly Triad are long since divorced, some as many as 4 times. We simply thought it was crazy to follow a marriage structure that fails half of the time. Would anyone get on an airplane that might crash half of the time? We just chose to avoid the possibility of a crash so who is the crazy ones.

[road]

My opinion is that this is proof that one should never settle and never stop putting effort into their relationships. From what it sounds like to me, the author's friends have passionless, dull, swamps of a relationship and they justify their unhappiness and infidelity by claiming it keeps a functional household. To me, a household is not functional if it's built of a web of lies and deceit. If you want to get down with the boom boom, fine, have at it, but do it in an open relationship where families will not potentially get hurt and households broken.

 

 

Out in the open does not make things better?

 

There is a thread where a wife and husband would

have threesomes.

 

Until the husband brought home a co worker. Then

the wife wanted some alone time with the Co worker

Sex became phenomenal with the Co worker. She was

doing the OM 2, 3, times a week.

 

Then when they had another threesome the husband

saw the wife responding to the OM in ways, breathing,

sounds, moans, that the OM was rocking her world like

she never had it rocked before.

 

Then to top it off the OM got a promotion and is now the

husbands boss.

 

So the husband said no more with this "friend" and now

the wife badly misses the sex with the OM.

 

So the wife pouts that she can no longer bang the OM.

And she seen her husband reaction during the last

threesome that he will never be able to make his wife

feel like the OM does.

 

This is something that the husband can never live down

now.

[KBob]

Out in the open does not make things better?

 

There is a thread where a wife and husband would

have threesomes.

 

Until the husband brought home a co worker. Then

the wife wanted some alone time with the Co worker

Sex became phenomenal with the Co worker. She was

doing the OM 2, 3, times a week.

 

Then when they had another threesome the husband

saw the wife responding to the OM in ways, breathing,

sounds, moans, that the OM was rocking her world like

she never had it rocked before.

 

Then to top it off the OM got a promotion and is now the

husbands boss.

 

So the husband said no more with this "friend" and now

the wife badly misses the sex with the OM.

 

So the wife pouts that she can no longer bang the OM.

And she seen her husband reaction during the last

threesome that he will never be able to make his wife

feel like the OM does.

 

This is something that the husband can never live down

now.

 

I'm not suggesting open relationships are the utopian solution, they can also fail. I'm simply saying that being open and honest is a better alternative to being dishonest and deceitful.

[elaine567]

If you want to get down with the boom boom, fine, have at it, but do it in an open relationship where families will not potentially get hurt and households broken.

 

Most cheaters I guess do NOT want an open relationship, that is not really what cheating is all about.

It is completely different dynamic.

[road]

I'm not suggesting open relationships are the utopian solution, they can also fail. I'm simply saying that being open and honest is a better alternative to being dishonest and deceitful.

 

I am saying why play with gasoline and matches.

For every post I seen where on open relationship

worked I have seen thousands where it did not.

 

Big deal being honest is better than cheating. That

still does not stop the open relationships from causing

too much pain.

[GoldenR]

Meh - I read it and all I see is fog babble, blame shifting and justification written by a very intellectual, PROFESSIONAL writer who made it sound a little different than what it is: bull****.

 

They cheat bc they want to.

 

And why are more women cheating? The internet...plain and simple reason. There's more men than ever cheating too. Also bc of the internet. And there are more single people willing to be APs as well. Also bc of the internet.

[KBob]

I am saying why play with gasoline and matches.

For every post I seen where on open relationship

worked I have seen thousands where it did not.

 

Big deal being honest is better than cheating. That

still does not stop the open relationships from causing

too much pain.

 

You're speaking in absolutes. Replace "does cause pain" with "can cause pain". If you're talking about your experience on here I would think that's what you've seen; this is a site to discuss problems in relationships, not very often do people come here to talk about how much success they've had. But this is where I'll stop my argument since I'm not someone who wants to be in an open relationship, I'm merely claiming it's a less destructive alternative to cheating, beyond that it's mostly societal and cultural elements that cause it to not work.

[Woggle]

They cheat for the same reasons men do. Women and men are not that much different. Don't try and dress it up in some phony female empowerment excuse.

[Logo]

They cheat for the same reasons men do. Women and men are not that much different. Don't try and dress it up in some phony female empowerment excuse.

 

 

The article, written by a woman, states the following:

 

"Since 1990, notes the psychoanalyst and writer, the rate of married women who report they've been unfaithful has increased by 40 percent, while the rate among men has remained the same."

[Blanco]

The article, written by a woman, states the following:

 

"Since 1990, notes the psychoanalyst and writer, the rate of married women who report they've been unfaithful has increased by 40 percent, while the rate among men has remained the same."

 

The article mentions that this shift in more women cheating is "closing the gap," which indicates that even with this change, more men cheat than women.

[Space Ritual]

What’s your opinion about this article?

The changing reasons why women cheat on their husbands - CNN

 

Any writer that sources Esther Perel is not only bereft of journalistic integrity for not doing their due dilligence, they are also bereft of common sense.

[Space Ritual]

They cheat for the same reasons men do. Women and men are not that much different. Don't try and dress it up in some phony female empowerment excuse.

 

Exactly. This crap has been tried to explain away personal responsibility for decades.

[DKT3]

Women actually aren't cheating more...they simply get caught more.

 

In 1948 Alfred Kinsey found that 1 in 4 children born into Marriage was NOT fathered by the husband. In 2013 a study showed that 1 in 4 children born into a marriage is NOT fathered by the husband. Scary part is people are having fewer kids, birth control is significantly better.

 

Women have always cheated at the same rate. More women working not being as dependent on men and social media has lead to them being caught more.

 

Lastly, people cheat because they want too. Everything elses is lipstick on a pig, still a pig.

[knabe]

It's pretty easy to understand why people cheat - selfishness. It is also easy to figure out why, if they are unhappy, they do not divorce instead - selfishness.

 

I think the reason more people are nonchalant about cheating is because our society has made it okay - even desirous - to be selfish.