Shanex Posted October 8, 2017 Share Posted October 8, 2017 Hey LS, So here I am on a sunday evening feeling great about myself and the people around me. I am now six months into a serious relationship, I saw her friday evening, watched a movie, spent the night together and invited her to a restaurant Saturday for lunch, then left to go back to my place before a big party in the evening for a friend's wife birthday. It was pretty great too, reconnected with people I hadn't seen in years. It all started online, on a dating site. We got along right after two messages, I'm dead serious. We have a lot in common, share many hobbies and music or movies taste and choices. Despite the good early start of the relationship I'd never have imagined we would still be together so close to the winter and for much longer I am hopeful. For some reasons the first few weeks and dates we never hanged out much outside of her place. She's a bit of a solitary recluse, just like I am most of the time. I know for a fact she dislike public transport unless she has obligations. I drive, and I can drive her anywhere if she needs to. We used to see each other once a week (She lives a solid 1 hour a drive from me and the traffic is horrendous) and now she'd like me to come twice a week and she even offered to pay for my ride so I can refuel...! Get a clue shanex, that girl really likes you! Hell, I haven't had such a great relationship in years, and I eventually dropped the L word a couple weeks ago as you guys told me in a previous thread to 'state the obvious' We never fight and very rarely argue. I know dispute and arguments happen in a couple and it's even 'healthy' in a way but we seem to like each other too much for yelling at each other. We both like to compromise instead. Question : I am liking her more by the day. Some people often claim that every relationship has a 'honeymoon phase' that eventually subside. Not here, not for us it seems. Oh 6 months is still a short time but by now I know her habbits, what food and drinks she loves, and so forth. We are even seriously planning a week vacation in a warmer country before the winter. We both can afford it and the thought of being away from my country with a woman I love thrills me! Many many good memories to come if we make the trip. It seems like the perfect relationship, we met at the right time, maybe the right person? Time will tell... For those of you who are currently in a short but exciting R: does your feelings also only developed over time? People in a LTR or a marriage can reply as well. We seem to have made no major missteps so far. So is it better to have a R that is only improving and getting more involved weeks after weeks rather than the honeymoon I described above. Have I grown up too to be mature when I am with someone (clue: I used to be the poster child of the ''white knight''.. if you know what I mean). PS: I am rambling a lot purposefully because I use LS often as a ''diary/journal''. It helps me understand how I felt like at such and such period of my life.. thank you for reading. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Dis Posted October 9, 2017 Share Posted October 9, 2017 I'm so happy for you Shanex! You deserve this! I'm not sure what the question is though Which is fine, its nice to finally have something positive to post and not a problem Correct me if I'm wrong but are you concerned that you havent gotten out of the honeymoon stage and that your RL isnt progressing in the standard way RLs tend to do? As in, the honeymoon stage hasnt ended so you guys arent getting on each other nerves yet and thats not normal? I dont think you should compare your RL to any other RL. Its different, its yours. And its great you guys are still getting along so well! This is a good problem... as in its not a problem Have fun on your vaca! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shanex Posted October 9, 2017 Author Share Posted October 9, 2017 Hi Dis, and many thanks! You're right the question isn't very clear. I was just wondering if love and feelings can only develop over time. I liked her from the first date but I am getting more attached by the day. I was indeed more venting than anything. Screaming to the world how happy I am. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
BikerAccnt Posted October 9, 2017 Share Posted October 9, 2017 Great news! As far as the "honeymoon" phase goes..perhaps you aren't getting on each other nerves, because you don't get on each other nerves. What I mean is, you are a good match. I've been with my GF for a bit more than a year, and like you, it's seems we are still in the honeymoon phase. But, more than that, I think it's because we are so in sync and our personalities mesh. So, now, even more than a year in, we have few, if any problems. We know how to work them out amongst ourselves in a way that leaves us feeling, we are good. No yelling or name calling. Compromise and respect, always. I don't see her quite as I first did, the blinders are off so to speak, but, doesn't matter. I still love what I see, who she is, and wouldn't change a thing. Maybe you found that one for you. I hope you did. Enjoy, and try not to over analyze. That is also my weakness, analyzing things to death instead of just enjoying. Best of luck to you! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Shanex Posted October 9, 2017 Author Share Posted October 9, 2017 Maybe you found that one for you. I hope you did. Enjoy, and try not to over analyze. That is also my weakness, analyzing things to death instead of just enjoying. Best of luck to you! I've always over analyzed everything and it's a bit ridiculous but I cannot help myself. I'm really more enjoying than anything here though. Thank you and best of luck to you too with your partner. I forgot to mention it on a side note but also congrats to Dis on the new R as well. I didn't reply but I always followed your posts with interest. Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted October 9, 2017 Share Posted October 9, 2017 Happy to hear your R is going well! Question : I am liking her more by the day. Some people often claim that every relationship has a 'honeymoon phase' that eventually subside. Not here, not for us it seems. Oh 6 months is still a short time but by now I know her habbits, what food and drinks she loves, and so forth. I hate to tell you this... but the typical "honeymoon period" lasts from 6 months to 2 years. Of course, this doesn't necessarily mean you two will have trouble later, either! It's entirely possible that this is your happy ever after, if both of you work at it. All I'm trying to say is that you probably ARE still within the honeymoon phase currently. The honeymoon phase doesn't typically end just by knowing someone's favourite food/drinks, etc. Usually it's triggered by going through difficult circumstances, a sort of make-or-break time. That's why it can last for up to 2 years - because by then you would usually have gone through a couple of difficult circumstances together. In my LTRs, the honeymoon phase lasted about 6 months, 1 year and 2 years respectively. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Dis Posted October 9, 2017 Share Posted October 9, 2017 Hi Dis, and many thanks! You're right the question isn't very clear. I was just wondering if love and feelings can only develop over time. I liked her from the first date but I am getting more attached by the day. I was indeed more venting than anything. Screaming to the world how happy I am. Yayyyy! Go ahead! I think you just answered your own question. You said, "I was just wondering if love and feeling can only develop over time." Then you said, "I liked her from the first date but I am getting more attached by the day." So, I think its perectly acceptable to like someone right off the bat but also develop stronger feelings as time goes on. That sounds healthy and exciting to me! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
newmoon Posted October 10, 2017 Share Posted October 10, 2017 wow, what is this shocking LS post??... someone is happy and problem-less??!! sounds really great so far. congrats on a happy relationship and enjoy your honeymoon phase while it lasts of course feelings deepen and grow with time ... you're falling more in love:love: 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted October 10, 2017 Share Posted October 10, 2017 I think as long as you are feeling the fire at this stage, this is a wonderful way for a relationship to develop. Slow and steady growth as things unfold and you discover more about each other making the flame hotter. Congrats! So happy for ya 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 10, 2017 Share Posted October 10, 2017 Very glad to hear about happy relationship :-) BF and I have been dating 22 months, that's practically 2 years and we are still in our honeymoon phase. I think it last this long because we have a great respect for each other and we were a good match from the start. We too enjoy the same things, we have the same life style, we enjoy laughing and we're both compromisers. What I beleive also helped is we are not spending too much time together. In other words we didn't burn the candle by both ends. If it feels good it's because you've been doing something right, keep doing it :-) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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