Feeling like a Cover-up.

[BadHabits]

Hi guys, I'm new here. I have a little dilemma and after scouring the forums for awhile, I decided to make an account and post! You guys around here seem like an honest bunch who help others and can give an impartial piece of advice, cause honestly, I'm STUCK. But here goes:

 

So ive been with this chick for 7 months. We live together. We've been through a lot in these seven months and shes such a beautifully kind person. She'd done so much for me, and even held the ship afloat when I lost my job, before I found another. Well, in the beginning, everything started great. and I mean GREAT. We fell for each other rather quick and have been damn near inseparable. She confides in me so much that she tells me intimate details of herself, and what happens in her life and at work. Here's where it gets good:

 

I find a porno stashed in a dvd rack backwards. All girls. Ironically, that was the day she decided to tell me she is bisexual. My reaction was one of like, "That's it?" and I let it go. Well. We go out and I notice she's really touchy with her friends. So, the cogs in my mind started turning. The scenarios I thought up (and this number is ever increasing) went from hot and steamy to, over time, a mix of nightmare and dream come true. One night out, one of her friends decide to pull her by the hand and walk onto the dance floor, and while their attention was on each other, I was holding the door. My gf walks in and the other one stops and says, "I can take her from you if I wanted to." I get pissed but bottle it up, after responding, "I would wreck you too, little girl."

 

Fast forward a week or two and i really start to think about it. Almost incessantly. It got to the point where my work speed and efficiency suffered. Well, as the relationship goes on, things get a little better but are always on the back of my mind. I then get laid off. So at this point she's keeping this ship afloat for the month and a half to two. She starts to get frustrated, and this is the first time I started having mixed feelings, like she didnt wanna be with me or something. the sex has slowed a bit with us working so much and I notice she doesn't get wet for me often, and we argue sometimes. I'm assuming the stress of the things going on has affected our relationship a bit, hence I couldnt get it up twice after I got into an accident, which im sure put a few insecurities in her mind too.

 

Well a week ago, two of her girl friends came over, and we all were drinking, and bumping coke....it was a great time. Homegirl was fighting with her bf (we'll call her Deb), and from what I know, she was caught browsing Craigslist bisexual section or something by her bf. The other friend (we'll call Lindsey)...idk much about her, but I did she her kinda touchy feely on Deb. So We're all on the couch and me and my gf are at far ends from each other with the two others in the middle. Now what happened next kinda baffled me but someone started talking about boobs. And nipple piercings. The one with the nip rings says something about it, to which my gf looks at me with an innocent look of like shes asking permission for something. I nod, and BAM, there she goes, flashing those beautiful d cups to everyone in the room, big grin on her face. I didnt think much of it at the moment, but yknow, i didnt ask for it. I should be the first one to see those babies every day. I texted her about it the following day and she said, "girls are very open with each other." and that she'd never do it again. The following night, while im right in front of them, Deb leans over and tells my gf something but covering her mouth so as I dont hear or see. My gf laughed and made a remark, "I'm just playing on his insecurities." To which later she brought it up and I had no idea what she was talking about, until she said that deb whispered "If you didn't have herpes, I'd **** you."

 

Well Deb ends up going to jail and a few days later we bail her out. At this point now, she's moved in. She lost her job, so we thought it was cool to be good friends, and who am I to turn away someone my gf really cares for right? Well in the couple days shes been here, a few things have happened. I notice they like to touch on each other. They get a few wine glasses and bumps in and its like BAM....they're touching each other's butts and making ffunny but, I feel, sexually charged comments. So we go smoke a cig in the back patio and i sit on the couch a ways away from Deb, and my gf pulls up a chair directly in front of us. Things got talked about, and my gf saw me looking at her pussy as her legs were wide open (shes wearing shorts). At which point she looks at me and runs her finger down the inside lining of her crotch. Deb makes a comment about showing the whole thing and my girlfriend smiles and does it! Deb said she wasnt gunna look, but even with her had blocking my view (she didnt know I was looking at her), I saw her eyes get wide, right at the vagina I call home. My girlfriend says I wasn;t looking cause she was looking at me, allegedly, and debn was looking at her, like a weird awkward triangle. and so I pry again about what she really wants and ****. To which she tells me that deb is like a sister and it would be gross to be with her. She claims she cant be with a girl because its unnatural. Deviant. She is ashamed of being bi, she says, and that she feels dirty when she does the nasty with women. Then thee other day she says she lied about being with women bbecause she thought it would turn me on, but she still is bi.

 

Today, We had the best sex we've had in a long time. Her dirty talk wwas like, "I've been a bad girl, punish me." And I'm like, welllllll.....****. I went with it though, and was all like, "so what have you been doing that makes you a bad girl?" and she didn't answer. I leave to go get parts for her car, and decided I'd just buy the, brand new instead of going to the junkyard. When I got back She was in her panties in Deb's room. When she heard me walk in, she said, "babe?" and she quickly walked out of Deb's room and started doing other things.

 

I feel like I'm being played and my intuition is catching on. Idk if I'm some kind of security blanket for society and her religious family to not judge her or her lifestyle. But it is killing me. If that happens in my face, What the **** happens behind my back, y'know? Or am I just being a bitch about it? I would entertain the idea of a girl I'm with doing her thing with whoever she wants, with the exception of the one I get too emotionally invested in. I have a bad habit of staying to myself and losing myself in my head when these things happen, and I get stuck in a loop or foreseeable outcomes and scenarios in my head. It weighs on me, but i love her so much and everything shes done for me. I greatly appreciate this woman but I don't know how much more of this I can take. I'm desperate for this to not affect me like it does. Its a mix of paralyzing anxiety, fear, anger and sadness. I cant seem to rationalize it.

 

AM I GOING CRAZY?!

[RecentChange]

Dude

 

You are living with someone you have known for least than a year.

 

Doing drugs with her.... And her friend that just got out of jail....

 

If you think a stable, healthy relationship is going to be born from this situation I have a bridge to sell you.

 

She is probably getting high and banging her girlfriend (and I am guessing you knew about the herpes and are okay with that? - when was your last STD test?)

 

If you want more for yourself, raise the quality of people you surround yourself with.

[BadHabits]

Well we've had some pretty amazing times and seem to be on the same page with what we want out of a relationship. We continue to do so, and she tells me that I have nothing to worry about. But I just can't get this out of my head and feel that she doesn't care by her actions, like they're ok. And it pisses me tf off. Like the intimacy between us is shared now and it eats me alive having to accept a situation like this. I love this girl....shes been good to me.

 

I feel crazy man

[BadHabits]

Dude

 

You are living with someone you have known for least than a year.

 

Doing drugs with her.... And her friend that just got out of jail....

 

If you think a stable, healthy relationship is going to be born from this situation I have a bridge to sell you.

 

She is probably getting high and banging her girlfriend (and I am guessing you knew about the herpes and are okay with that? - when was your last STD test?)

 

If you want more for yourself, raise the quality of people you surround yourself with.

 

ell we've had some pretty amazing times and seem to be on the same page with what we want out of a relationship. We continue to do so, and she tells me that I have nothing to worry about. But I just can't get this out of my head and feel that she doesn't care by her actions, like they're ok. And it pisses me tf off. Like the intimacy between us is shared now and it eats me alive having to accept a situation like this. I love this girl....shes been good to me.

 

I feel crazy man

[BadHabits]

Bump.

 

Anyone else ?

[Space Ritual]

Hi guys, I'm new here. I have a little dilemma and after scouring the forums for awhile, I decided to make an account and post! You guys around here seem like an honest bunch who help others and can give an impartial piece of advice, cause honestly, I'm STUCK. But here goes:

 

So ive been with this chick for 7 months. We live together. We've been through a lot in these seven months and shes such a beautifully kind person. She'd done so much for me, and even held the ship afloat when I lost my job, before I found another. Well, in the beginning, everything started great. and I mean GREAT. We fell for each other rather quick and have been damn near inseparable. She confides in me so much that she tells me intimate details of herself, and what happens in her life and at work. Here's where it gets good:

 

I find a porno stashed in a dvd rack backwards. All girls. Ironically, that was the day she decided to tell me she is bisexual. My reaction was one of like, "That's it?" and I let it go. Well. We go out and I notice she's really touchy with her friends. So, the cogs in my mind started turning. The scenarios I thought up (and this number is ever increasing) went from hot and steamy to, over time, a mix of nightmare and dream come true. One night out, one of her friends decide to pull her by the hand and walk onto the dance floor, and while their attention was on each other, I was holding the door. My gf walks in and the other one stops and says, "I can take her from you if I wanted to." I get pissed but bottle it up, after responding, "I would wreck you too, little girl."

 

Fast forward a week or two and i really start to think about it. Almost incessantly. It got to the point where my work speed and efficiency suffered. Well, as the relationship goes on, things get a little better but are always on the back of my mind. I then get laid off. So at this point she's keeping this ship afloat for the month and a half to two. She starts to get frustrated, and this is the first time I started having mixed feelings, like she didnt wanna be with me or something. the sex has slowed a bit with us working so much and I notice she doesn't get wet for me often, and we argue sometimes. I'm assuming the stress of the things going on has affected our relationship a bit, hence I couldnt get it up twice after I got into an accident, which im sure put a few insecurities in her mind too.

 

Well a week ago, two of her girl friends came over, and we all were drinking, and bumping coke....it was a great time. Homegirl was fighting with her bf (we'll call her Deb), and from what I know, she was caught browsing Craigslist bisexual section or something by her bf. The other friend (we'll call Lindsey)...idk much about her, but I did she her kinda touchy feely on Deb. So We're all on the couch and me and my gf are at far ends from each other with the two others in the middle. Now what happened next kinda baffled me but someone started talking about boobs. And nipple piercings. The one with the nip rings says something about it, to which my gf looks at me with an innocent look of like shes asking permission for something. I nod, and BAM, there she goes, flashing those beautiful d cups to everyone in the room, big grin on her face. I didnt think much of it at the moment, but yknow, i didnt ask for it. I should be the first one to see those babies every day. I texted her about it the following day and she said, "girls are very open with each other." and that she'd never do it again. The following night, while im right in front of them, Deb leans over and tells my gf something but covering her mouth so as I dont hear or see. My gf laughed and made a remark, "I'm just playing on his insecurities." To which later she brought it up and I had no idea what she was talking about, until she said that deb whispered "If you didn't have herpes, I'd **** you."

 

Well Deb ends up going to jail and a few days later we bail her out. At this point now, she's moved in. She lost her job, so we thought it was cool to be good friends, and who am I to turn away someone my gf really cares for right? Well in the couple days shes been here, a few things have happened. I notice they like to touch on each other. They get a few wine glasses and bumps in and its like BAM....they're touching each other's butts and making ffunny but, I feel, sexually charged comments. So we go smoke a cig in the back patio and i sit on the couch a ways away from Deb, and my gf pulls up a chair directly in front of us. Things got talked about, and my gf saw me looking at her pussy as her legs were wide open (shes wearing shorts). At which point she looks at me and runs her finger down the inside lining of her crotch. Deb makes a comment about showing the whole thing and my girlfriend smiles and does it! Deb said she wasnt gunna look, but even with her had blocking my view (she didnt know I was looking at her), I saw her eyes get wide, right at the vagina I call home. My girlfriend says I wasn;t looking cause she was looking at me, allegedly, and debn was looking at her, like a weird awkward triangle. and so I pry again about what she really wants and ****. To which she tells me that deb is like a sister and it would be gross to be with her. She claims she cant be with a girl because its unnatural. Deviant. She is ashamed of being bi, she says, and that she feels dirty when she does the nasty with women. Then thee other day she says she lied about being with women bbecause she thought it would turn me on, but she still is bi.

 

Today, We had the best sex we've had in a long time. Her dirty talk wwas like, "I've been a bad girl, punish me." And I'm like, welllllll.....****. I went with it though, and was all like, "so what have you been doing that makes you a bad girl?" and she didn't answer. I leave to go get parts for her car, and decided I'd just buy the, brand new instead of going to the junkyard. When I got back She was in her panties in Deb's room. When she heard me walk in, she said, "babe?" and she quickly walked out of Deb's room and started doing other things.

 

I feel like I'm being played and my intuition is catching on. Idk if I'm some kind of security blanket for society and her religious family to not judge her or her lifestyle. But it is killing me. If that happens in my face, What the **** happens behind my back, y'know? Or am I just being a bitch about it? I would entertain the idea of a girl I'm with doing her thing with whoever she wants, with the exception of the one I get too emotionally invested in. I have a bad habit of staying to myself and losing myself in my head when these things happen, and I get stuck in a loop or foreseeable outcomes and scenarios in my head. It weighs on me, but i love her so much and everything shes done for me. I greatly appreciate this woman but I don't know how much more of this I can take. I'm desperate for this to not affect me like it does. Its a mix of paralyzing anxiety, fear, anger and sadness. I cant seem to rationalize it.

 

AM I GOING CRAZY?!

 

Of course when you are doing bumps you are ALL going to get horned out. Back in my cocaine days I'd get so horny if I could find a Buick Exhaust Pipe in a parking lot I'd be all over it. lol

 

 

You have set yourself up for this disaster all on your own. You rushed into this based solely on her looks and sex and not what type of person she was. Now you are seeing that sex is not everything when it comes to relationships.

 

You've had it. It will only get worse. If it's not his third wheel, it will be another.

 

You might as well go find a Buick. At least a Riviera or an Electra 225 won't pull shady crap on you.

[smackie9]

Why not ask her to share some of that action and have a threesome? It seems to me that's what those two have been putting in front of you.....

[kgcolonel]

Well we've had some pretty amazing times and seem to be on the same page with what we want out of a relationship. We continue to do so, and she tells me that I have nothing to worry about. But I just can't get this out of my head and feel that she doesn't care by her actions, like they're ok. And it pisses me tf off. Like the intimacy between us is shared now and it eats me alive having to accept a situation like this. I love this girl....shes been good to me.

 

I feel crazy man

 

BH, you really don't state what you're looking for in this R. You're not married, but living together. Can you deal with a GF that "does the deed with another girl"? For some this would be cheating, for some it wouldn't matter, this is a question for you.

 

Dating is like a trial run on a relationship....if you're not getting what you want and there's a significant difference in what you want and what you're getting, walk.....very simple.

 

Just IMO

[coolheadal]

Bi-sexual with another bi-sexual with herp A or B or both warts too? Do you know what you could up with as a man that's pretty awful. She's and this other girl is have sex, touching and feeling oh boy what STDs all the place. You not thinking.. Warts would show on on the skin as bumps. Do you see any on the other girl? This like 3 Company, you a a guy to chicks in love It's your life played or not your are in the house of sexual love..