Great. Now she hates me.

[David Gevert]

Remember when I told you guys in my last reply to the "She wants relationship with benefits" post?

 

To recap, I told her I didn't want her any more.

 

I said it more angrily than I intended; she wrote me a long letter telling me all kinds of stuff, from why she was giving me all the letters and such back to her being sorry for hurting me.

 

I have reason to believe that she was manipulating me during the entire course of the relationship. I sort of went off the wall and wrote a letter that pretty much took apart her own - I think I shouldn't have done that - and asked her to come down and talk. (I might post the letter here to show you exactly what I'm talking about - let me know if I'm being far too vague here.)

 

She did. She read the letter.

 

And then when we started talking...I saw it. I saw it in her eyes. Hatred. Or maybe just extreme anger.

 

She then stormed off.

 

I still care about this girl. I don't want a relationship with her; I feel she's far too manipulative and far too good of a liar for a relationship. But having her hate me...that's too much.

 

What should I do?

[Miss Mojo]

hi david,

 

well.....it sounds to me as though she's angry with you because you hit the nail right on the head here. heck, i'd go so far as to say that her behaviour right now is a form of manipulation. she's probably angry because she hasn't got her own way, when she should be understanding of the fact that you don't want a 'friendship with benefits'.

 

you had reason to believe she was manipulating you during the course of your relationship because there's a 99% chance she was. you don't always need concrete proof of this. sometimes our instincts tell us everything we need to know.

 

i wholeheartedly congratulate you for being upfront with her and letting her know you are not going to settle for crap. i don't think you did the wrong thing by writing her a letter and telling her what you think. you had every right to do that, considering it appears that she has being playing games here. there's no need to pussyfoot around her. straight to the point is the way to go.

 

david, i don't think she hates you. she just wants you to THINK that she hates you. why? because that's all part of her manipulative ways. she sounds so immature.

 

this girl sounds like she really needs some growing up to do. it was immature of her to storm off like she did.

 

let her calm down, but don't contact her in the meantime. she's the one that has some serious thinking (and maturing) to do here, not you.

 

good luck to you

[Tony T]

So big deal even if she does hate you. Why should you care? She is history and should be!

 

You really flatter yourself if you think her hating you is significant. Nobody is able to hate anyone 24 hours a day. Most of the time they're too busy with their own selfish stuff to think about people they dislike. So she may think about you 30 seconds every other day and really dislike you, BIG DEAL!!!

 

One day, you won't even be a blip on her radar. She won't love you or hate you or even think about you...maybe once every year or two for 15 seconds.

 

Let her go, get your life back in order, and go for something meaningful and satisfying for your life.