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is this normal? why am I uncofortable about it?


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Hello ...

 

well, i have a close guy-friend ... not my bf, just an other friend with whom i hang out. here's the deal: whenever there's a big party & he's with his "boys", he doesn't notice me! - he says hi and that's it ... he'll drive me there n back if i ask & talk to me on the way & he also talks a lot when we're alone or in a small group ... but when he's w/ the boyz he's just off n gone... i guess it's fine in a way ... but i feel a bit like he's hiding the fact that we're friends? ... maybe i'm just used to getting his attention cuz we normally hang out in a small group in not alone ............

 

Any comments?

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oops:

 

* if not alone

Hello ... well, i have a close guy-friend ... not my bf, just an other friend with whom i hang out. here's the deal: whenever there's a big party & he's with his "boys", he doesn't notice me! - he says hi and that's it ... he'll drive me there n back if i ask & talk to me on the way & he also talks a lot when we're alone or in a small group ... but when he's w/ the boyz he's just off n gone... i guess it's fine in a way ... but i feel a bit like he's hiding the fact that we're friends? ... maybe i'm just used to getting his attention cuz we normally hang out in a small group in not alone ............

 

Any comments?

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Dragonflys

He is exactly like the guy you describe, and I know him very well.

 

Take it from me:

 

The fact that he goes a little quiet when with the boys does not mean he is being disrepectful of you, not at all. It is simply (as in the case of my friend) that he is shy expressing himself to women in front of other guys.

 

The guy I know is Irish born and grew up with the 'lads' mentality. He's been out of Ireland for a couple of years but it stays with him. From what he tells me, he really would love to express himself more but just feels very embarrased.

 

If he treats you with respect when you are alone with him, or you are with other women, then he is a great person. Also, don't expect him to change real quick, if at all.

 

Oliver

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