Gaeta Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 I just haven't got the time to be sending texts all day when I could be saying the exact same things in person with physical contact. Who said anything about texting all day? Listen, being considerate and showing interest is not the same as being needy. Don't you think it's weird that all women here are telling you a short text is nice? contrary to your Corey guy? Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 I know youre not asking me, but I would not. I just went back and thoroughly read the details. I think she canceled with you because you didn't confirm. I would do the exact same thing.It's frustrating when people leave someone hanging for a first meet online because there are lots of flakes. I think that is what she means by 'pre-arrangements'. It's not needy to confirm plans the day before. All you need to say is "are we still on for x tomorrow at x?" It's not only respectful, it's actually telling her that you want to make sure it's coming or you're going to make other plans yourself. If that's seen as too needy, she not only has issues but you wouldnt have a chance with her anyway. There shouldn't be that thin of a wire to walk. Excellent point Cookie! I didn't catch on the fact she said pre-arrangements. Link to post Share on other sites
Highndry Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 She's a flake. Move on. Link to post Share on other sites
Coffeeguy Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 So you wouldn't bother to go on a date with a guy if he didn't contact you for 48 hours? It just seems a little needy, especially when you'll see him in two days. I could understand if we had a date in 7 days time, then yeah I'd "check in" but not when the date is two days away. I agree with her. There is no way I could possibly let 48 hours go by with a potential person without saying anything. You have to keep the string going only because we live in the age of cell phones where it's easy to do. I never saw the issue with texting periodically throughout the day before you meet someone, as long as it isn't for weeks. We debate how much texting is too much, if and when it's OK, etc., while completely skipping the entire point of it all: To get to know someone better. Personally, I would take an hour on the phone a night with a text during the day saying the time of call but alas, it seems to be impossible now. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 I know youre not asking me, but I would not. I just went back and thoroughly read the details. I think she canceled with you because you didn't confirm. I would do the exact same thing.It's frustrating when people leave someone hanging for a first meet online because there are lots of flakes. I think that is what she means by 'pre-arrangements'. It's not needy to confirm plans the day before. All you need to say is "are we still on for x tomorrow at x?" It's not only respectful, it's actually telling her that you want to make sure it's coming or you're going to make other plans yourself. If that's seen as too needy, she not only has issues but you wouldnt have a chance with her anyway. There shouldn't be that thin of a wire to walk. Fair point. On the day of the date I did say I was looking forward to seeing her tonight, so I assumed that would be enough. Tomorrow night I'll confirm it like you said. If something as little as that is seen as needy and a put off for her, then I'd be better to move on if I have to walk such a tight line! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 nay, a plan old flake would have said something came up or she's sick or something. she straight up told you what the issue was and it's not that she's not free. it's the game playing and lack of contact. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 Don't you think it's weird that all women here are telling you a short text is nice? women don't like "nice" 2 Link to post Share on other sites
olivetree Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 It's not too horrible but not impressive at the same time. OP refered to Corey Wayne's rules. It's funny because in all the silly 'how to catch a good man' I read they always said if a man let more than 48 hours go by with no communication it's because he's not that interested. Yeah I agree. Not too horrible is not saying good. A few things happen when a woman doesn't hear from a guy for a few days: Out of sight, out of mind = interest wanes.She loses confidence that the man is interested in her. So she won't feel comfortable on the date.She assumes he is not a great communicator. OP, I would take the WOMEN'S advice on this one. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 Who said anything about texting all day? Listen, being considerate and showing interest is not the same as being needy. Don't you think it's weird that all women here are telling you a short text is nice? contrary to your Corey guy? That depends on the woman or anyone giving the advice, if they're in a relationship that's going very well, then the advice they're giving is going to be of the same quality. I guess there's no harm in sending a short text, but I don't like texting incase something is taken out of context, that's my problem. I've said things in the past that I thought were okay, but wasn't. Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 23, 2017 Author Share Posted October 23, 2017 nay, a plan old flake would have said something came up or she's sick or something. she straight up told you what the issue was and it's not that she's not free. it's the game playing and lack of contact. She didn't really say game playing, she just said that what I was doing was "different" and she wasn't used to it, she's used to talking a bit before meeting. That's understandable, but I don't like getting sucked into conversations over the phone, again, something I could say in person whilst making physical contact. There's too many people who rely on texting too much that they just settle for it instead of meeting. I'd rather just keep setting up dates one after another and doing the interaction in person. I'll throw in a few "check in" texts I guess, to bridge the gap, but I'll keep it short and sweet and then end the conversation. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Coffeeguy Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 That depends on the woman or anyone giving the advice, if they're in a relationship that's going very well, then the advice they're giving is going to be of the same quality. I guess there's no harm in sending a short text, but I don't like texting incase something is taken out of context, that's my problem. I've said things in the past that I thought were okay, but wasn't. I've always just been myself with texts. I tell people straight up if this is your main way of communicating, so be it. Just don't think I want to marry you because I sent a text that actually forms (wait for it)...a sentence! I'm so interesting I sometimes type two or three of them. And if something is taken the wrong way, so be it. Are we communicating or do you just like the attention your phone gives you with simple "lol" and "what's up?". Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 women don't like "nice" Women like nice guys, they just don't like pushovers. They don't want a guy who will be nice purely because he likes the woman and bend the knee to everything she says or wants. They want a man who stands by his own values and opinions and isn't going to be easily influenced. You can still be a good/nice man, but it has to be a personality trait that comes naturally.. You're going to be nice to someone you don't find attractive, etc just purely because you're a good person. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 Yeah I agree. Not too horrible is not saying good. A few things happen when a woman doesn't hear from a guy for a few days: Out of sight, out of mind = interest wanes.She loses confidence that the man is interested in her. So she won't feel comfortable on the date.She assumes he is not a great communicator. OP, I would take the WOMEN'S advice on this one. I'll drop her a text tomorrow morning asking if we're still on for Wednesday night then, just to keep in touch. But if she was that interested anyway, she'd have reached out to me when she hasn't heard back from me. This has always been the case with girls who have then become my girlfriend.. Why? Because they were interested enough to become my girlfriend. Link to post Share on other sites
olivetree Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 She didn't really say game playing, she just said that what I was doing was "different" and she wasn't used to it, she's used to talking a bit before meeting. That's understandable, but I don't like getting sucked into conversations over the phone, again, something I could say in person whilst making physical contact. There's too many people who rely on texting too much that they just settle for it instead of meeting. I'd rather just keep setting up dates one after another and doing the interaction in person. I'll throw in a few "check in" texts I guess, to bridge the gap, but I'll keep it short and sweet and then end the conversation. Here is what you do then if you don't like talking too much before you meet: Keep talking on the site until you meet. Don't use the app at all or check your messages all the time, but do try to check daily. When you communicate through the site, you're not expected to answer right away (I only checked my messages once a day), and you can send something a bit more thoughtful because you're typing it out on the comp not the phone. Send your first text / communication by phone the day of. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 That depends on the woman or anyone giving the advice, if they're in a relationship that's going very well, then the advice they're giving is going to be of the same quality. I guess there's no harm in sending a short text, but I don't like texting incase something is taken out of context, that's my problem. I've said things in the past that I thought were okay, but wasn't. I understand you want to be safe but in your attempt to be safe you went to the other extreme and it makes you appear disinterested. Again, it's not about having conversations over text, it's about touching base. Also, try to confirm your dates the day before not on the same day. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 I've always just been myself with texts. I tell people straight up if this is your main way of communicating, so be it. Just don't think I want to marry you because I sent a text that actually forms (wait for it)...a sentence! I'm so interesting I sometimes type two or three of them. And if something is taken the wrong way, so be it. Are we communicating or do you just like the attention your phone gives you with simple "lol" and "what's up?". From Corey's book, he does say women should do 70-80% of the initiating of communication, to keep the polarity in your favour.. Because if a girl is doing most of the communication, then it's obvious she isn't going away any time soon. Anyone can say what they will about that, but his theory has been proven and it's worked in my last relationships. Only thing that ended it was "something missing/spark going" and our job hours not fitting with each other, working weekends, etc. So far I've been doing 100% of it, it's not like she's tried to reach out to me with a simple "hey how's your day?". Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 I'll drop her a text tomorrow morning asking if we're still on for Wednesday night then, just to keep in touch. But if she was that interested anyway, she'd have reached out to me when she hasn't heard back from me. This has always been the case with girls who have then become my girlfriend.. Why? Because they were interested enough to become my girlfriend. Yes and no. There are many women, especially young women that have been taught to let the man do all of the efforts for the first 3 dates. I don't agree with it but it's out there. It's a way for the women to confirm the man is interested, women are also taught if they pursue a man he will lose interest so that's why this woman didn't reach to you. She wanted you to make the first step to confirm your interest and she didn't make that step to not pursue you and then appear less of a challenge. Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 From Corey's book, he does say women should do 70-80% of the initiating of communication, to keep the polarity in your favour.. Because if a girl is doing most of the communication, then it's obvious she isn't going away any time soon. Anyone can say what they will about that, but his theory has been proven and it's worked in my last relationships. Only thing that ended it was "something missing/spark going" and our job hours not fitting with each other, working weekends, etc. So far I've been doing 100% of it, it's not like she's tried to reach out to me with a simple "hey how's your day?". Okay 1st , who made Corey Wayne Seer of All? Secondly, has Corey Wayne heard of friendzone. Women love to talk. Even (maybe especially) to men they arent interested in sexually/romantically. Spark missing usually means lack of attraction 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 Yes and no. There are many women, especially young women that have been taught to let the man do all of the efforts for the first 3 dates. I don't agree with it but it's out there. It's a way for the women to confirm the man is interested, women are also taught if they pursue a man he will lose interest so that's why this woman didn't reach to you. She wanted you to make the first step to confirm your interest and she didn't make that step to not pursue you and then appear less of a challenge. The amount of advice given to both genders, I'm surprised relationships even exist and we're not in one massive standoff 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 From Corey's book, he does say women should do 70-80% of the initiating of communication, to keep the polarity in your favour.. Because if a girl is doing most of the communication, then it's obvious she isn't going away any time soon. Anyone can say what they will about that, but his theory has been proven and it's worked in my last relationships. Only thing that ended it was "something missing/spark going" and our job hours not fitting with each other, working weekends, etc. So far I've been doing 100% of it, it's not like she's tried to reach out to me with a simple "hey how's your day?". So this Corey guy is teaching you men how to be the women in romantic relationships? It will work with a small portion of women, some women are chasers but you are denying yourself the other 80% of women who want a man that is confident enough to pursue them properly. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 Okay 1st , who made Corey Wayne Seer of All? Secondly, has Corey Wayne heard of friendzone. Women love to talk. Even (maybe especially) to men they arent interested in sexually/romantically. Spark missing usually means lack of attraction His work is proven to be fair. Yeah he has a topic that focuses on the friendzone, if a woman friendzones you then you say you're only interested in a relationship at the very least and back off. It's simple advice like that to help you stop wasting time on women that aren't interested and focus on those that are. Yeah women love to talk, we get told to ask a lot of questions and let the woman do most of the talking on a date whilst keeping our answers brief. Link to post Share on other sites
Author amazonrambo Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 So this Corey guy is teaching you men how to be the women in romantic relationships? It will work with a small portion of women, some women are chasers but you are denying yourself the other 80% of women who want a man that is confident enough to pursue them properly. No he's teaching us how to be the man and how showing masculine energy is the only way to attract a woman. Those who show feminine energy get rejected. This is why we leave the relationship labels/status to the woman to bring up whilst we focus on just having a fun time with her. If I'm doing most of the communcation, I'm chasing her = chasing her away. If a woman is contacting me more than I am her, then she's obviously interested. Link to post Share on other sites
jay1983 Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 Well she didn't contact during that 48 and probably wouldn't have after if you didn't initiate 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 No he's teaching us how to be the man and how showing masculine energy is the only way to attract a woman. Those who show feminine energy get rejected. This is why we leave the relationship labels/status to the woman to bring up whilst we focus on just having a fun time with her. If I'm doing most of the communcation, I'm chasing her = chasing her away. If a woman is contacting me more than I am her, then she's obviously interested. *sigh* You almost lost your date with this woman and more of us told you we would not have shown up, yet you insist Corey knows better. Good luck with that. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Coffeeguy Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 From Corey's book, he does say women should do 70-80% of the initiating of communication, to keep the polarity in your favour.. Because if a girl is doing most of the communication, then it's obvious she isn't going away any time soon. Anyone can say what they will about that, but his theory has been proven and it's worked in my last relationships. Only thing that ended it was "something missing/spark going" and our job hours not fitting with each other, working weekends, etc. So far I've been doing 100% of it, it's not like she's tried to reach out to me with a simple "hey how's your day?". The only women I've known to do 80% of the communication are those who always have something to complain about or talk too much about themselves and don't let you have your day in the sun. It just sounds like a game to me and another reason I despise some of the attitude behind texting and sometimes texting in general. Link to post Share on other sites
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