matty145 Posted October 22, 2017 Share Posted October 22, 2017 So I met this girl at a college party, she thought I was cute so I got her number. We went to a few other parties together and had a lot of fun and I've slept over at her place a couple times. Now it seams every time I text her to hangout or do something she's busy. I haven't hung out with her for just under two months, so I basically said "I really like you, let's hangout or otherwise I'm gonna stop trying." And she responded with a day we could hangout at her place. We text a lot and she initiates the conversations about 50% of the time. And I think she's in to me, but I find myself having to really push her to hangout or to see her. I'm thinking she may be playing hard to get or I'm just being too pushy. Should I maybe stop texting her for a while and see if she initiates something? What you guys think? Thanks. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted October 22, 2017 Share Posted October 22, 2017 She's not that interested in you. She doesn't want to be your girlfriend. At this point she doesn't dislike you but has just decided she's not interested romantically. You should just move on. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author matty145 Posted October 22, 2017 Author Share Posted October 22, 2017 Then why does she initiate all these text conversations? And she seams interested during the conversations. Link to post Share on other sites
Author matty145 Posted October 22, 2017 Author Share Posted October 22, 2017 She's not that interested in you. She doesn't want to be your girlfriend. At this point she doesn't dislike you but has just decided she's not interested romantically. You should just move on. Then why does she initiate all these text conversations? And she seams interested during the conversations. Link to post Share on other sites
EthanSPK Posted October 22, 2017 Share Posted October 22, 2017 Then why does she initiate all these text conversations? And she seams interested during the conversations. Because she's leading you on. By the way: "I really like you, let's hangout or otherwise I'm gonna stop trying." You look kinda desperate if you say something like that, especially if the girl has been rejecting your hangout requests for two months straight. You should've stopped trying after the second time you asked. It happened to me before. Don't let it happen to you (even though it has already happened) Link to post Share on other sites
Author matty145 Posted October 22, 2017 Author Share Posted October 22, 2017 Because she's leading you on. By the way: You look kinda desperate if you say something like that, especially if the girl has been rejecting your hangout requests for two months straight. You should've stopped trying after the second time you asked. It happened to me before. Don't let it happen to you (even though it has already happened) What do you mean she's leading me on? Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted October 22, 2017 Share Posted October 22, 2017 People on here have no more clue as to what she's thinking than you do, so take the negativity with a grain of salt. Let's be practical about this... you have reason to believe that she's interested but asking to hangout is not working. Are you asking at the last minute? She might just be super busy. I know my daughter is in grad school and she schedules her time tight––she works on school stuff all day every day. She calls me when she's in the car or walking somewhere to make efficient use of her time. Why don't you ask her on a real date, not a hangout, and ask at least 4-5 days in advance. She sort of gave you a hint that she prefers to schedule her time, and perhaps she isn't thrilled about spontaneous hangout offers. Be more mature and far-sighted, treat her special, and see what happens. Link to post Share on other sites
Author matty145 Posted October 22, 2017 Author Share Posted October 22, 2017 People on here have no more clue as to what she's thinking than you do, so take the negativity with a grain of salt. Let's be practical about this... you have reason to believe that she's interested but asking to hangout is not working. Are you asking at the last minute? She might just be super busy. I know my daughter is in grad school and she schedules her time tight––she works on school stuff all day every day. She calls me when she's in the car or walking somewhere to make efficient use of her time. Why don't you ask her on a real date, not a hangout, and ask at least 4-5 days in advance. She sort of gave you a hint that she prefers to schedule her time, and perhaps she isn't thrilled about spontaneous hangout offers. Be more mature and far-sighted, treat her special, and see what happens. That's good advice. Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
Author matty145 Posted October 22, 2017 Author Share Posted October 22, 2017 It's weird, she'll initiate the text conversations and tease me about inside jokes and what not, shes also busy lot, she works like 40-50 hours a week, but she's very flakey, and has bailed a couple times on our plans. I think I'm just gonna ice her and not text her for a while and see what happens. I kind of what to send a text that gives the message, "don't text me unless you actually wanna do something", (not in those specific words) Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted October 22, 2017 Share Posted October 22, 2017 I kind of what to send a text that gives the message, "don't text me unless you actually wanna do something", (not in those specific words) No, no. Don't do that. You'll come across as bitter and whiny. You have positive flow with the texting, but it seems like she's taking you for granted. The best reaction is to become less available and let her wonder, but no overt sniveling. Be slower to respond, short answers, go out with other women, don't account for your time, and be less invested generally. It will either work or it won't, and if not then she was not motivated... if she cares but thinks she's got you all locked up, this will get her attention and she'll be more attentive. But in the long run these are silly games and you won't find much satisfaction in a relationship where you have to pull away to get someone's attention. The real solution here is to go out with other people. Women go nuts for guys with options, plus you have options! Link to post Share on other sites
Author matty145 Posted October 22, 2017 Author Share Posted October 22, 2017 (edited) No, no. Don't do that. You'll come across as bitter and whiny. You have positive flow with the texting, but it seems like she's taking you for granted. The best reaction is to become less available and let her wonder, but no overt sniveling. Be slower to respond, short answers, go out with other women, don't account for your time, and be less invested generally. It will either work or it won't, and if not then she was not motivated... if she cares but thinks she's got you all locked up, this will get her attention and she'll be more attentive. But in the long run these are silly games and you won't find much satisfaction in a relationship where you have to pull away to get someone's attention. The real solution here is to go out with other people. Women go nuts for guys with options, plus you have options! Too late, I already sent it. Couldn't help myself. Sometimes you just have to call bull**** when you see it. I called her out for always bailing, so well what happens, I'll stop texting her for a while. Edited October 22, 2017 by matty145 Link to post Share on other sites
Author matty145 Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 I think I've just been pushing her too much and being kind of clingy. I'll ignore her for a while. Link to post Share on other sites
kvb92 Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 "don't text me unless you actually wanna do something", (not in those specific words) I'm sorry but that was an absolutely terrible idea to send that text. Link to post Share on other sites
Author matty145 Posted October 24, 2017 Author Share Posted October 24, 2017 I'm sorry but that was an absolutely terrible idea to send that text. How do you figure? Link to post Share on other sites
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