Bantosm Posted October 23, 2017 Share Posted October 23, 2017 Yesterd/ay I went on a first day with a woman I recently met. I have great circulation which has its benefits namely a thick head of hair but there are some negatives namely my hands and fingers feel too hot and it can get very uncomfortable. I like to hold hands with females who have cold hands it seems to provide more relief than any air conditioning at least for short while. Anyhow, I was on the date yesterday, and I held her hand. I'm not sure if she was giving me a compliment but she said my hands were big. I think my hands are average sized so I think she may have been giving me a false compliment. She remarked that her hands were always cold. It felt great feeling the heat from my hand transfer into hers. I knew my pleasure came at her expense but I didn't care. As her hand absorbed more heat and approached the temperature of mine, all great tactile sensations were diminish until finally the combined effect created an irritating humid feel, yuck. She said her hand was hot a bit surprised by the result. Even though she basically challenged me, I found pleasure even though she may have suffered a bit. Am I sweet or sadistic? Link to post Share on other sites
Els Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 Lol. Might be a somewhat strange way of discovering it, but there's nothing wrong at all with a bit of consensual sadism. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
TheWoman Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 Just based on what you have written, I would say you are autistic. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted October 24, 2017 Share Posted October 24, 2017 Just based on what you have written, I would say you are autistic. I am ashamed to say that I actually just laughed out loud. OP, if her hands are always cold, it probably felt good to her too. I'm amazed every day at the topics that get brought up here. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
EthanSPK Posted October 25, 2017 Share Posted October 25, 2017 You can't be serious, pal... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Bantosm Posted October 26, 2017 Author Share Posted October 26, 2017 Just based on what you have written, I would say you are autistic. I was going post the symptoms of autism most have nothing to do with what I posted. There is a mention of lack of empathy but I don't really think she was in pain. How are basing a connection to autism from what I what I posted? Link to post Share on other sites
TheWoman Posted October 26, 2017 Share Posted October 26, 2017 It was not an insult, there are many people in my family who I love, who are not neurotypical. This is what jumped out at me: - absolutist thinking (sweet or sadistic) - sensory issues (a tendency to 'run hot' is also common in autism) - literal thinking - issues with theory of mind (lack of empathy is not quite the right description) I am not diagnosing you, this is just what jumped out at me. English second language could also be attributable. However, what you described and how you described it, was not neurotypical. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Bantosm Posted October 26, 2017 Author Share Posted October 26, 2017 It was not an insult, there are many people in my family who I love, who are not neurotypical. This is what jumped out at me: - absolutist thinking (sweet or sadistic) - sensory issues (a tendency to 'run hot' is also common in autism) - literal thinking - issues with theory of mind (lack of empathy is not quite the right description) I am not diagnosing you, this is just what jumped out at me. English second language could also be attributable. However, what you described and how you described it, was not neurotypical. I never had anyone label with me with having characteristics of autism. Besides a google search shows that none of those are connected with autism save for literal thinking but that's for the extreme side where someone doesn't understand idioms. If you're going to give more examples best to cite links that show that your not making up things. Link to post Share on other sites
elaine567 Posted October 31, 2017 Share Posted October 31, 2017 I never had anyone label with me with having characteristics of autism. Besides a google search shows that none of those are connected with autism save for literal thinking but that's for the extreme side where someone doesn't understand idioms. If you're going to give more examples best to cite links that show that your not making up things. I am not sure what you inputted into Google but all are associated with autism and ASDs. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Bantosm Posted November 1, 2017 Author Share Posted November 1, 2017 I am not sure what you inputted into Google but all are associated with autism and ASDs. Can you cite that? Link to post Share on other sites
dichotomy Posted November 2, 2017 Share Posted November 2, 2017 When you squeeze her hand hard enough to get a "yelp"! then you are sadistic. Otherwise your just fire and ice love. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted November 2, 2017 Share Posted November 2, 2017 Not sweet, not sadistic. Just a bit selfish if you're prepared to get your own comfort at the expense of the comfort of others. Not sure why you mentioned the hand size comment. Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted November 2, 2017 Share Posted November 2, 2017 i have hot hands too.....i remember two past bfs would hold my hand while they were driving after a while they would drop it on long drives, wipe their hands on their jeans and then continue to hold my hand.. they cared to take me to places i love.....far away.......that thought makes me smile.....they didnt care i had hot hands they cared to hold my hand on those long mystery drives.....and they cared where i wanted to be enough to remember where i love..... i don't think its sadistic you like to transfer heat.....whats a little water between lovers...but then...i have hot hands......maybe im sadistic too..deb 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Bantosm Posted November 2, 2017 Author Share Posted November 2, 2017 When you squeeze her hand hard enough to get a "yelp"! then you are sadistic. Otherwise your just fire and ice love. I wouldn't do anything like that. Now I would like the idea holding her hands after doing heavy work with my hands after she did one of those soft hand treatments. Not sweet, not sadistic. Just a bit selfish if you're prepared to get your own comfort at the expense of the comfort of others. Not sure why you mentioned the hand size comment. I took her comment that I had big hands as I bit of joke to tease me, so it made me want to defeat her challenge that her hands were always cold that much more. Link to post Share on other sites
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