Ex coming back

[Maximus1108]

Hi all

 

I'll keep this as short as possible. If you need more details please ask me.

 

We broke up almost 3 months ago because of many discusiions and arguments. We were in a relationship for 2,5 years. I immediately go NC to heal. After 3 weeks she starts to date someone new.

 

After 2 months she starts to come back. First by putting a small bag of clothes by my backdoor, contacting me a week later if I had found them and a couple of days later meeting me face to face to give more stuff back. During that conversation she says she found someone new but that this was merely to get over me, she is still angry because we had a future together which no longer exists and that she misses me a lot. It was very nice going conversation, we had an immediate click. She also wanted to know if i was seeing someone else.

 

I was completely convinced that i didnt want her back but after this conversation i decided to put my door open again and so i told her a couple of days later when she brought some more stuff. She didnt see this coming and was very surprised. I said: i would like to get to know you again and leave the old relationship for what it is. She said: as friends? To which i said: that would be a good start.

 

I said: think about it and let me know if you feel the same. She said: i've already been thinking a lot the past couple of days.

 

So my question is: i think these are all pretty good signs. It's been 5 days now since we last spoke and 2 days ago she contacted a mutual friend to get more info on how i feel. Should i contact her again if i dont hear anything? Or should i just do nothing?

 

Many thanks

[galamoosh]

I think you're about to get friendzoned. You need to make it clear that you want a romantic relationship and that friendship isn't an option. Otherwise all you're trying to do is be her friend and manipulate her to leave her bf, which won't work. She either has to try with you and keep you in her life or she chooses this other guy and you move on for good.

[Maximus1108]

Yes I totally agree with and I will tell her that. The moment she contacts me again I will say start as friends but with the intention of getting back together

[basil67]

Maximus, I would not see making contact/plans to return your things as positive contact.

 

My negative opinion on that aside, what makes you believe that it would work if you got back together again this time? If you couldn't make it work before, it's unlikely to work again.

[Maximus1108]

Basil: the positive part lies in what she said.

 

The question is: should i wait for her to reach out since the ball is in her court or should i contact her again after a week?

Edited October 25, 2017 by Maximus1108

[lolablue17]

Let me understand - She talks with you while dating another guy?

[Maximus1108]

Exactly, that is the case

[lolablue17]

So it's not about your ex who wants to get back with you and you both hesitate.

 

It's about a lying girl, who is contacting you without telling her current bf about it, she's cheating on him, and playing with your both feelings.

 

She's bad. It's not a situation, or wrong decision... it's her real character that has been exposed to you right now. If I were you I wouldn't be so nice to her, and I might have contacted her current bf, telling exactly him what's going on including everything she told me, and kick her ass asking her to never show me her face again.