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Lovers or nothing?


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Ok ladies.... and gents too if you will. I've know my friend for about 7 years. Recently I've been attracted to her. But of course I always think should I tell her how I feel. I always hear that once you let the person know you like them and she doesn't feel the same way you lose the friendship. Does it really have to be that way? Just throw 7 years of friendship away? I think if this situation was presented to her she's say yes you lose the friendship. The reason for that is cause she gave the same advice to a friend that was going through the same thing. Which is if you like a friend.. and the friend doesn't like you back then you pretty much lose the friendship too. But why does it have to be that way? Is it cause the lover can't see the person in the friendship light again? Thoughts anyone?

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You can sit back do nothing and go through life wondering what might have been had you done things differently. OR... you take a risk and let whatever happens happen. At least then you can say you tried rather than did nothing at all.

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elijahBailey

sounds like the feeling is unrequited. Usually, after so many years, you're firmly rooted in her friends category. It's too difficult to cross the line. I'm not sayin' it's impossible, but, here's where you gotta sniff her out a little. If she's not giving anything away as to her feelings, I would seriously forget about it.

 

Sure, being honest is good. But if you know she's not feeling the same way, I would say forget about it. After you proclaim your feelings and she says 'no', you'll have to go thru withdrawal. We all have random feelings for one another. Sometimes it's just a crush. Also, if you try and it bombs, I wouldn't say you'll lose the friendship. However, it'll take time to get the pieces mended back together again.

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thegoodhubbie

If you have feelings for her, you tell her, and she does not reciprocate them; my friend, do not stay in the friendship. It will get very painful and it will drive you crazy. Of course I don't know your whole situation, but the same thing happened to me, and it was never the same. It got very complicated. Sex and "friendship" do not work. Period.

 

So, either take the chance and tell her and if she does not reciprocate, move on. Or say nothing and let it drive you crazy. Either way, you are kind of f***ed.

 

Good luck and keep us updated.

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I guess it just depends on what's most important to you...having the friendship continue or taking the chance to see if the feelings you have are returned. Best to you as that is a hard spot to be in.

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