How does someone get the courage to kill themselves?

[HiCrunchy]

I saw a picture of the "most beautiful suicide today". Its a very famous photo taken a long time ago, but it is indeed very beautiful in a way. I was reading about her, she was my age, she was beautiful. She did what I could never do.

 

http://time.com/3456028/the-most-beautiful-suicide-a-violent-death-an-immortal-photo/

 

Sometimes I think it would be better if I found the courage to end everything.

But I am too much a of a coward to do so. Sometimes I wonder if there is a way I could find that courage to release myself. Having the strength to know when to give up.

 

I am tired, all my accomplishments are meaningless in the grand scheme of things. I don't even know why I try to do anything anymore. It is a waste of time. Life is meaningless, and the fact that we try to assign meaning to things is our way of coping with our own lack of purpose.

 

My mother keeps saying I was a miracle baby since she couldn't get pregnant for a long time, but I hate existence.

 

Don't suggest therapy, been there and done that. My problems aren't considered "real problems"

 

I am so so tired.

Don't worry, I wouldn't actually hurt myself as I mentioned in my last post.

I just have to learn to cope that nothing good is going to happen and the good things that do, aren't going to stay.

 

Also just for arguments sake, can someone give me a good reason, why someone shouldn't commit suicide. I haven't found an aruguemtn that is convincing.

[d0nnivain]

What do you mean your problems aren't "real problems"? You are depressed. That is a medical diagnosis that has a treatment plan.

 

 

You need help reorganizing your thinking. I do too because like you I sometimes feel my accomplishments are meaningless. That doesn't mean either of us is correct in our assessment.

 

 

I thought you were making a plan to get your own place. Once you get that accomplishment under your belt & you get out from under your mother's stifling thumb, things will improve but you have to be here & be alive to accomplish that.

 

 

Just the other day you told me things weren't so bad & you had gotten assistance from the Suicide Prevention hotline. Call back or go to an ER if you truly feel like you are in danger.

[BarbedFenceRider]

"Why do we fall down? So we can get back up again..."

Wise words. You are not a coward, but ending your life creates a huge vacuum in the world around you that no one gets a say in. Your workmates, your friends, family. Even the little pimply faced kid in the starbucks is affected.

How do I know? Well, try eleven years as a Paramedic/Firefighter. It almost got me. I went to a very dark place, but I looked through and you will to. How many times did I have to put people back together just to keep abusing themselves and others? How many times did I breathe air into people who just thought it was all meaningless anyway?

The cowards way is to end it. Not for you, but for all those you leave behind. You DO have purpose, but you refuse to grasp it. You do have love, but refuse to acknowledge it. It's so obvious, that even random people here on LS see it. I have seen the other side, and when it's not your time, you don't want to go there. I don't know if your a spiritual person, but you should spend sometime internally and ask, why should you have courage? Maybe you shouldn't, maybe it's time to open your heart and let others in. To help shoulder the load. There is help, but you have to be willing to receive it. Its there for the taking. And when you finally do, you WILL find your purpose, your story is not done yet. It just needs some new ink and a clean sheet of paper. God bless you. Peace be with you.

 

Don't hesitate to call for help.

[GunslingerRoland]

I am tired, all my accomplishments are meaningless in the grand scheme of things. I don't even know why I try to do anything anymore. It is a waste of time. Life is meaningless, and the fact that we try to assign meaning to things is our way of coping with our own lack of purpose.

 

 

For every Albert Einstein there are a million (or maybe a billion) people who won't do any single specific meaningful contribution that society will know about, but everyday we can make the world better in our own little ways. You aren't wasting your time or your life by living it, nor is anyone else.

 

And I don't agree with you that it takes any particular courage to commit suicide... you aren't a coward. You are just someone who realized at some level that it isn't the right answer.

 

If you went to a therapist who told you that your problems aren't real, they are a horrible therapist... you can find a better one if you choose to do so.

[RecentChange]

Suicide is not courage, it's cowardice.

 

Dealing with life is courage. Facing your problems is courage.

 

ASKING FOR HELP IS COURAGE

[Imajerk17]

<snip>

 

I am tired, all my accomplishments are meaningless in the grand scheme of things. I don't even know why I try to do anything anymore. It is a waste of time. Life is meaningless, and the fact that we try to assign meaning to things is our way of coping with our own lack of purpose.

 

<snip>

 

But, your story has just begun. You may (probably will) meet someone amazing, fall in love, and have a terrific family.

 

Your kind words in the meanwhile might brighten the life of some other person--and whomever that person touched--who really really needed it.

 

Snuffing that light out would be selfish on your part and a loss to the world.

 

I don't think your last therapist was as helpful as she could have been. I don't know if you were formally diagnosed, but it sounds that you have depression. It is treatable and you should seek help from it.

Edited November 17, 2017 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
Truncate quote

[HiCrunchy]

What do you mean your problems aren't "real problems"? You are depressed. That is a medical diagnosis that has a treatment plan.

 

 

You need help reorganizing your thinking. I do too because like you I sometimes feel my accomplishments are meaningless. That doesn't mean either of us is correct in our assessment.

 

 

I thought you were making a plan to get your own place. Once you get that accomplishment under your belt & you get out from under your mother's stifling thumb, things will improve but you have to be here & be alive to accomplish that.

 

 

Just the other day you told me things weren't so bad & you had gotten assistance from the Suicide Prevention hotline. Call back or go to an ER if you truly feel like you are in danger.

 

I have never been diagnosed with depression. Yes, I am saving but it will be a while before anything like moving out is possible. But it isn't only living with my mother that is difficult, though it has been putting a number on my mental health. But I cannot guarantee that I will be happy after that. Right now, I am alone, the only person I have ever loved is gone and is never coming back because I wasn't enough of a partner for him. He is so happy and I wish I could be a part of his happiness and success. He was always such a light and I have nothing to offer as human being. I have no friends in the area. I have cried alone more times than I would like to admit.

 

Things aren't as bad. About one year ago, my family went through a fire last year and we lost everything except our lives, we slept on the floor for a long time in an "apartment' that wasn't on the books. It was cold in the winter and full of bed bugs that bit us all the time. When my love first left me a little while after that, the only thing that made me happy during that time. He embodied everything I wish I could be, and I was so honored that me loved me, but I was foolish to think that anyone could love me for more than a little while. There is nothing I could offer to make him happy other than my love, but that isn't enough. After he left, I lost 25 pounds because everything I ate I would throw up because I was in so much emotional pain. The sharp pain in my chest made it so that I couldn't breath or swallow well most of the time. I would cry myself to sleep and my grades started slipping (hard science calls for my major) and it was hard to wake up in the mornings. I wouldn't get out of bed until 11 am most mornings. I am lucky I had classes in the afternoon.

 

So yes, right now things are better now. I only call the suicide hotline to talk to someone because people in my every day life can't listen to me talk about my feelings anymore. I cry sometimes when I think about him and how I miss him. How I haven't found even one person that could measure up to him. He was almost like prince charming lol. I know he is gone, but my heart still even now hopes. I just know how to torture myself, huh. I keep hoping that by telling myself, some people like me are meant to be alone that my heart will stop trying to think that I will end of happy someday, that someone will love me. I have to stop with that fantasy. Even my biology is a against it, so why force something that isn't meant for me right?

 

Yes, a counselor once old me my problems aren't real problems. That is where I got that from.

 

Thank you for looking out for me, tho. I really appreciate it.

 

"Why do we fall down? So we can get back up again..."

Wise words. You are not a coward, but ending your life creates a huge vacuum in the world around you that no one gets a say in. Your workmates, your friends, family. Even the little pimply faced kid in the starbucks is affected.

How do I know? Well, try eleven years as a Paramedic/Firefighter. It almost got me. I went to a very dark place, but I looked through and you will to. How many times did I have to put people back together just to keep abusing themselves and others? How many times did I breathe air into people who just thought it was all meaningless anyway?

The cowards way is to end it. Not for you, but for all those you leave behind. You DO have purpose, but you refuse to grasp it. You do have love, but refuse to acknowledge it. It's so obvious, that even random people here on LS see it. I have seen the other side, and when it's not your time, you don't want to go there. I don't know if your a spiritual person, but you should spend sometime internally and ask, why should you have courage? Maybe you shouldn't, maybe it's time to open your heart and let others in. To help shoulder the load. There is help, but you have to be willing to receive it. Its there for the taking. And when you finally do, you WILL find your purpose, your story is not done yet. It just needs some new ink and a clean sheet of paper. God bless you. Peace be with you.

 

Don't hesitate to call for help.

 

Suicide is not courage, it's cowardice.

 

Dealing with life is courage. Facing your problems is courage.

 

ASKING FOR HELP IS COURAGE

 

 

People are selfish and create huge vacuums all the time. Partners leave us after being in love (look at this entire forum, people are even encouraged to leave their partner when they don't feel that spark anymore, running away like selfish cowards), children abandon parents and vice versa, etc. How is suicide any different? At the end of the day, all these people are choosing themselves, and with suicide that person is choosing to release themselves and running away. That is what humans do. So what if its selfish, people are so damn selfish all the time. If people who leave relationships can expect their "pasted loved one" to move on, people can do the same when someone exits out of their life through suicide. Humans are selfish, cowards. If suicide is selfish, cowardice, then it is just human nature.

 

Thank you for your words tho. I really appreciate your kindness.

Edited November 17, 2017 by HiCrunchy

[BaileyB]

With all due respect, you need to find another counsellor. Your feelings are valid and you definitely sound like you are depressed.

 

It may be a situational depression... In that, it may improve once you get some independence, find your own place to live, and develop some new friends and social contacts. When I still lived at home, my best friend's mother once told me that my relationship with my mother would improve so much when I moved out and got my own home. Boy, was that the truth!

 

I will tell you very honestly, happiness will not be found in a relationship with a man.

 

Read that again, your happiness will not be found in a relationship with a man. It is a band-aid, the hormones may feel good and he may distract you for a while but the relationship will not work long term unless you deal with your issues. You need to deal with the depression and develop more self confidence and self esteem. I have little doubt as I listen to you talk that IF you were to begin dating a man tomorrow, you will be clingy, needy, and dependent which will chase any man away and ruin any relationship that you try to have right now.

 

Focus on healing yourself and creating a life that makes you happy... Then, and only then, will you find your own happiness and love again.

[BaileyB]

I once heard it said that suicide is nothing more than an impulsive decision made during a moment of desperation and hopelessness.

 

This is why suicide hotlines exist... If someone on the phone can help the individual get through that dark moment of desperation, there is an opportunity for reason and clarity to intervene. There is hope that the individual will make a better decision.

 

Again, with all due respect, your view on selfishness and human nature is the depression talking. This world is filled with love - people who sacrifice for friends and family, strangers who offer kindness and compassion, others who do generous and selfless acts... It happens all around you, every day, you are just not seeing this right now because you see the world through the filter of depression.

 

I wish you well. Please, find another counsellor. You deserve the opportunity to feel better.

[HiCrunchy]

The cowards way is to end it. Not for you, but for all those you leave behind. You DO have purpose, but you refuse to grasp it. You do have love, but refuse to acknowledge it. It's so obvious, that even random people here on LS see it. I have seen the other side, and when it's not your time, you don't want to go there. I don't know if your a spiritual person, but you should spend sometime internally and ask, why should you have courage? Maybe you shouldn't, maybe it's time to open your heart and let others in. To help shoulder the load. There is help, but you have to be willing to receive it. Its there for the taking. And when you finally do, you WILL find your purpose, your story is not done yet. It just needs some new ink and a clean sheet of paper. God bless you. Peace be with you.

 

Don't hesitate to call for help.

 

You're making a lot of assumptions here. What is my purpose if I have one?

What is so obvious that others on this forum are seeing and that I do not see?

Opening my heart and letting others in? I do not understand what you mean by this. Id not like I wanted to be alone and rejected especially by the man I loved the most. It is just what happened. If anything everyone has rejected me after I wore my heart on my sleeve.

 

I'm not going to get into religion/spirituality/God as it is a huge factor in my depression and gives me so much anxiety. Especially if you know how I was raised and what it means for me to be living back home, but that is a whole other can of worms that isn't relevant to this thread for me at least.

 

I have spent a lot of time thinking about "my purpose", but I haven't come up with an answer that is satisfactory to me. I have come to conclusion that our purpose is just a coping mechanism for human existence, because we can't come to terms with the reality that we have no purpose life and that it is meaningless.

 

I do thank your for your blessings and kind thoughts.

Edited November 17, 2017 by HiCrunchy

[fieldoflavender]

Please please get help - maybe you need anti-depressants if it's that bad that psychotherapy can't "talk you out of it". Please don't do anything that is irreversible.

[Frostedflake]

You're making a lot of assumptions here. What is my purpose if I have one?

What is so obvious that others on this forum are seeing and that I do not see?

Opening my heart and letting others in? I do not understand what you mean by this. Id not like I wanted to be alone and rejected especially by the man I loved the most. It is just what happened. If anything everyone has rejected me after I wore my heart on my sleeve.

 

I'm not going to get into religion/spirituality/God as it is a huge factor in my depression and gives me so much anxiety. Especially if you know how I was raised and what it means for me to be living back home, but that is a whole other can of worms that isn't relevant to this thread for me at least.

 

I have spent a lot of time thinking about "my purpose", but I haven't come up with an answer that is satisfactory to me. I have come to conclusion that our purpose is just a coping mechanism for human existence, because we can't come to terms with the reality that we have no purpose life and that it is meaningless.

 

I do thank your for your blessings and kind thoughts.

 

 

I'm going to challenge you because I think you're tough enough to take it.

Because I see that you're literally having an internal fight about this, and the fact that this is a fight at all means that you don't really want to end it.

 

The issue with your view on a purpose is you went from saying "my purpose" to arguing "our purpose". They are not the same thing. We are not cookie cut, identical to each other. Your purpose is yours, and although it effects others- it is not suppose to take that away from you. Yes, we do have societal obligations. Yes, we do have religious obligations. And yes, you would bear even further obligations if you moved home to live under your parents again.

 

I wonder now if you are assuming that a persons purpose combats everything like a shield we create.

It doesn't. A purpose isn't something you obtain and then no longer have to work at or maintain. It's literally the reason you are fighting against those terrible things in the world. And most importantly, it's finding the medium between obligations and circumstances.

 

You don't like religion because people have used it against you. I get that.

I like it because no one in the Bible had an easy life. The people who believed in God the most, who did the most, preached, and bled for the word the most did not have easy lives. Their purposes actually caused them pain because they had to gain a sight different from those around them. And that sight felt a lot like this isolation you're feeling.

You feel so blind to this hidden purpose. You feel like everyone here is seeing something you don't. You feel like you're on the edge.

Well I think you're on the edge of a break through. I think this bottom of the barrel feeling is how you get your sight.

[d0nnivain]

The counselor who told you that your problems aren't real deserves to lose their license. Get that out of your head now.

 

You are sad / upset because you miss your EX. That is a temporary situation that does not require a permanent solution.

 

The fire was a HUGE loss that caused emotional damage.

 

You are also in a transition period -- college to working to wanting an apartment.

 

Don't do anything rash or irreversible. My therapist doesn't even want me to change jobs right now while I'm depressed. It's too much change, which is where you are.

 

Set some small goals & move forward.

 

Consider getting some therapy from a qualified caring therapist not the quack who told you that your problems aren't real

[HiCrunchy]

But, your story has just begun. You may (probably will) meet someone amazing, fall in love, and have a terrific family.

 

Your kind words in the meanwhile might brighten the life of some other person--and whomever that person touched--who really really needed it.

 

Snuffing that light out would be selfish on your part and a loss to the world.

 

I don't think your last therapist was as helpful as she could have been. I don't know if you were formally diagnosed, but it sounds that you have depression. It is treatable and you should seek help from it.

 

I already acknowledge that suicide is selfish, but that doesn't mean that it is inherently a bad things if it is the right thing for the person to do. As I mentioned before people eject themselves from our lives, people pick themselves all the time in many different ways, and in my opinion I do not see a difference in someone choosing to leave another person, and someone choosing to leave their life. I do not believe in true altruism, and if it does exist it is all too rare. One in billion.

 

I once heard it said that suicide is nothing more than an impulsive decision made during a moment of desperation and hopelessness.

 

This is why suicide hotlines exist... If someone on the phone can help the individual get through that dark moment of desperation, there is an opportunity for reason and clarity to intervene. There is hope that the individual will make a better decision.

 

Again, with all due respect, your view on selfishness and human nature is the depression talking. This world is filled with love - people who sacrifice for friends and family, strangers who offer kindness and compassion, others who do generous and selfless acts... It happens all around you, every day, you are just not seeing this right now because you see the world through the filter of depression.

 

I wish you well. Please, find another counsellor. You deserve the opportunity to feel better.

 

I suppose she wasn't that helpful, but I didn't expect her to be able to help me anyways. I just needed someone being paid to listen to my problems, because realistically one cares about each others problems really. We all like to pretend that we do because it grants us that high superiority and moral high ground that makes us feel good about ourselves. I do wish that I could feel better, but I don't see that happening. I really miss alcohol.

 

I'm going to challenge you because I think you're tough enough to take it.

Because I see that you're literally having an internal fight about this, and the fact that this is a fight at all means that you don't really want to end it.

 

The issue with your view on a purpose is you went from saying "my purpose" to arguing "our purpose". They are not the same thing. We are not cookie cut, identical to each other. Your purpose is yours, and although it effects others- it is not suppose to take that away from you. Yes, we do have societal obligations. Yes, we do have religious obligations. And yes, you would bear even further obligations if you moved home to live under your parents again.

 

I wonder now if you are assuming that a persons purpose combats everything like a shield we create.

It doesn't. A purpose isn't something you obtain and then no longer have to work at or maintain. It's literally the reason you are fighting against those terrible things in the world. And most importantly, it's finding the medium between obligations and circumstances.

 

You don't like religion because people have used it against you. I get that.

I like it because no one in the Bible had an easy life. The people who believed in God the most, who did the most, preached, and bled for the word the most did not have easy lives. Their purposes actually caused them pain because they had to gain a sight different from those around them. And that sight felt a lot like this isolation you're feeling.

You feel so blind to this hidden purpose. You feel like everyone here is seeing something you don't. You feel like you're on the edge.

Well I think you're on the edge of a break through. I think this bottom of the barrel feeling is how you get your sight.

 

I interchange my and our because it doesn't matter what the purpose is really. We just need "something" to distract us. The reason we have to protect and continually maintain it is because we need it to extend our entire lives or else we don't have a reason to fight the fight anymore. It is a distraction. Humans are more alike than we like to realize. Our DNA is even 99 percent the same. This is why we have such similar experiences for the most part. Why for many of the problems we experience we are told the same: when people break up, they tell you "no contact" and that you will just move on (hasn't happened for me but hey I am human so statistically it has to happen at some point right?), why "communication is key" or "that MM will never be with you".

 

I think it depends on how you want me to look at the Bible. I know the Bible very well, I went to church every Sunday my entire life till I went to college.

There are a lot of good life lessons in there for someone that wants to keep living life. But that again is another can of worms.

 

Well as far as a breakthrough is concerned, I hope that you are right.

 

The counselor who told you that your problems aren't real deserves to lose their license. Get that out of your head now.

 

You are sad / upset because you miss your EX. That is a temporary situation that does not require a permanent solution.

 

The fire was a HUGE loss that caused emotional damage.

 

You are also in a transition period -- college to working to wanting an apartment.

 

Don't do anything rash or irreversible. My therapist doesn't even want me to change jobs right now while I'm depressed. It's too much change, which is where you are.

 

Set some small goals & move forward.

 

Consider getting some therapy from a qualified caring therapist not the quack who told you that your problems aren't real

 

It doesn't matter what I call him (ex, his name, my love). My feelings for him are the same. Calling him my love is accurate, because he is. My love is unconditional I guess, I can't change how I feel even with all the tips to move on that people have given me. It has just over a year, so I guess it depends how long these feelings will endure. Maybe its permanent, for now I have to reason to believe they are not. He probably doesn't care if I drop dead tomorrow, it makes me sad but it just emphasizes the worthlessness I have.

sigh...idk, I am such a silly person to think relationships are for me. My singleness till now should be been an indication, the fact that I am not attracted to most men must have been a que, I am just working against what is supposed to happen.

 

Yep, the fire, the break up, transitioning, not having friends near by, my living situation all got me ****ed up. This is true. I almost cried while ordering food today and even cried in the bathroom at work. Not sobbing, thank god, I don't want people to know anything.

 

I am not going to go to a councler again. I have tried twice, and either time was helpful. Plus I don't need anyone to know this is what I am feeling.

I have told my sis, bits but she doesn't know everything.

[HiCrunchy]

But thank you all for your concern, but I am not suicidal. I do not believe I am capable of doing it, because I am too much of a coward. I said this in the beginning, but I just wanted to make sure that everyone understood that. Although I am sharing a number of thoughts that might make some people uncomfortable. I am sorry about that and I do thank you for taking the time reply to me. And all of those people that wish for me to be happy, I thank you. It is something that I wish for myself as well. Having others to talk to is really helpful and I should stop bothering those folks at the suicide hotline. That way they can help others that truly need it.

Edited November 17, 2017 by HiCrunchy

[d0nnivain]

You are not bothering the people at the hotline. They are there because they want to help you. If you need them, call them.

 

 

Reaching out here is good too.

 

 

I am so sorry that you had a bad experience with therapy. I had some bad ones too. It's like dating: you move on 'til you find one that works.

 

 

Try reading some self help books from the library about reducing stress, healing from breakups etc. Take a mediation class / seminar. Try writing down stuff every day that you are grateful for. It doesn't have to be profound but it can be. It sounds silly but over time it builds up positive energy which can help you over come the bad stuff.

[Fever of love]

I saw a picture of the "most beautiful suicide today". Its a very famous photo taken a long time ago, but it is indeed very beautiful in a way. I was reading about her, she was my age, she was beautiful.

Also just for arguments sake, can someone give me a good reason, why someone shouldn't commit suicide. I haven't found an aruguemtn that is convincing.

 

I would describe that as a very beautiful photograph, and the fact that is of a suicide adds a deep poingancy to the pic, but I wouldnt describe it as a 'Beautiful suicide.'

 

As for your final question, you may be interested to know that the existential philosopher Albert Camus devoted many of his books to exactly that question. I think 'The Myth of Sysyphus' in particular, tackles the question of 'Is life even worth Living?' He smoked a lot of cigarettes and drank a lot of coffee, and says things like 'Should I commit suicide, or have a cup of cofffee?' Hahha.

 

He says whether to kill oneself or not is the central question of philosophy. But he's also kind of funny, and comes to the conclusion that its better to just have the coffee after all.

 

Wish we could post images on LS- if you do an image search for 'albert camus memes' I'm sure you'll get the picture

[marky00]

My problems aren't considered "real problems"

 

I get what you mean with this OP.

 

The big issue with therapists is most of them don't want to help with what they call "catastrophes".

 

After my LTR ended, I went into therapy right away and several different therapists told me to come back after a month or two when things were less "catastrophic" as they put it. I approached 3 or 4 top psychologists and they all said the same thing.

 

So basically they wanted me to do it on my own and once I had done 95 per cent of the work, they wanted to empty my pockets to analyze my childhood experiences since that wasn't considered to be catastrophic events.

 

When they say real problems, they mean problems they are willing to listen to. They don't want to sit there and hear you talking about terrible heartbreak or maybe suicide, that's for sure. If you do mention, your having suicidal thoughts, they have you fill in a checklist that leads to nothing anyway.

[Frostedflake]

I interchange my and our because it doesn't matter what the purpose is really. We just need "something" to distract us. The reason we have to protect and continually maintain it is because we need it to extend our entire lives or else we don't have a reason to fight the fight anymore. It is a distraction. Humans are more alike than we like to realize. Our DNA is even 99 percent the same. This is why we have such similar experiences for the most part. Why for many of the problems we experience we are told the same: when people break up, they tell you "no contact" and that you will just move on (hasn't happened for me but hey I am human so statistically it has to happen at some point right?), why "communication is key" or "that MM will never be with you".

 

I think it depends on how you want me to look at the Bible. I know the Bible very well, I went to church every Sunday my entire life till I went to college.

There are a lot of good life lessons in there for someone that wants to keep living life. But that again is another can of worms.

 

Well as far as a breakthrough is concerned, I hope that you are right.

 

You're flip-flopping again, Crunch.

You went from saying all lives are meaningless distractions to saying you won't be calling helplines anymore because they're better off helping those who have a will to live.

It's obvious you think others lives hold more weight than your own. Therefore when you said people are 99% the same you did not count yourself in there- did you? And if you had, wouldn't we be talking people out of suicide a lot more often? The things you could accomplish if you applied that same drive and argumentative spirit you have for this thread..

 

You seem to want to argue the human condition, which really just says that no matter what beliefs, what experiences, or what actions you take- life is bad. Life is bad because we're human. Life is bad because our species has a different social awareness and our instinct includes a moral compass.

But WHY is that so bad? And does this not relate to you having to revisit the same lessons and having the same problems over and over?

You're seeing the same issues in your life and others because you're not (and they're not) doing anything different to change it. I imagine that would make life pretty mundane.

 

..You are not weak.

But there is weakness in giving up on life and trying to pass it off as inevitable.

[lana-banana]

Suicide isn't about courage, it's an expression of pain. Suicide happens when a person's pain exceeds their ability to cope with said pain. People die of suicide for all kinds of reasons, none of which are right or wrong; they just hurt more than they can handle. Everyone's coping thresholds are different. Your problems aren't "fake" or "unimportant" just because other people can handle harder problems. You are who you are.

 

Asking for help takes courage. Admitting unhappiness takes courage. Saying "I feel like garbage, but I'm going to try again anyway"---THAT'S bravery. And that's why life is worth living.

 

There is no argument against suicide that you're going to entertain right now, because none of our words will really reach you. You are in a state where reality feels like a fog, where everyone is too loud and everything is too bright and it's all oppressive and overwhelming and all you want is to go home and sleep. That's fine. Sleep for a while. But if you can, set one goal per day, whether it's spending some time to read or going to the gym or shopping for new clothes. Try to eat healthy. Talk to a friend at least twice a day. And reach out to a professional, even if it's just talking to someone on an anonymous chat line. You aren't wasting anyone's time; that's why they're there. You can post here, too. We'll listen.

 

[JuneL]

I once read that when you encounter someone who wants to commit suicide (I mean someone not just says it, but really means it), instead of reminding her/him that s/he is selfish or lucky compared to those suffering much more, the most effective thing is to remind her/him that s/he is loved, even by a stranger. I think that, often, those contemplating suicide feel isolated emotionally and disconnected from others.

Edited November 18, 2017 by JuneL

[Highndry]

Lots of people love you, HiCrunchy!

[basil67]

I am tired, all my accomplishments are meaningless in the grand scheme of things. I don't even know why I try to do anything anymore. It is a waste of time. Life is meaningless, and the fact that we try to assign meaning to things is our way of coping with our own lack of purpose.

 

I don't think I've ever tried to assign "meaning" to things. Why do you feel the need to do this? Why is it not enough to simply be a good person and enjoy your life?

 

You say your accomplishments are meaningless, but I'm not sure I understand your thought process. Can you give examples of accomplishments which you see as having meaning? Are we talking Nobel Prize winners? Thing is, most people don't change the world. But we can all make a little difference somewhere.

[Chilli]

Hey Crunchy , .

 

yaknow , life isn't all about achievements, matter of fact , l haven't met many very happy high achievers at all , and l've met a lot.

As a matter of fact , even back in teens l noticed the happiest people were the simplest people and l've net a lot of them too, and l've usually envied and admired them the most,, even back in my teens.

 

Yaknow , life's full of twists and turns and kicks in the gut and even those simplest of people have been to hell and back usually at some point or another, and had broken hearts too bet on that.

 

But life changes, all the time, never know what's next or around the corner.

And soon you'll move out , and life will change again. There's be new things and people and environments and loves too.

 

l guess we live for tomorrow at times like this.

[Hoosfoos]

Suicide is not cowardly, it requires a massive amount to courage to go about it...otherwise everyone would be doing it. It takes a massive amount of planning, dedication, and effort to snuff out a life. The will to live, even in suicidal people, is strong. No one truly knows what is on the other side, and it to risk everything to get there requires conquering massive fears. People who say suicide is cowardly say so to feel moral superiority about themselves.