Why

[Joe]

A lot of my problems, issues, both mental and physical and emotional is fixable probably one way or another. My whole life I've felt I never had anyone to talk to about my problems and issues.

 

I keep everything bottled up, tonight I was talking to my only friend - yes I have 1 friend, and we got to talking about me having the issues and such. I kept saying that what I needed was someone to talk to, that I've never had anyone to talk to and I have so much I want to get off my chest.

 

Basically, I felt as if she didn't care. She kept talking about how when she had issues she helped herself all by herself. I said "there is something everyone in life needs, someone to talk to. Someone that'll just sit there and listen to a persons problem so it doesn't get bottled up. I don't have that, I don't feel as if I have that someone and it's all bottled up"

 

She kept saying I should go see a therapist. ARGH I don't want to go to a stranger to discuss my problems, I know nothing is wrong with that. All I want is a friend that'll sit down with me and let me pour my guts out, let out every issue and problems I have and things that bothers me.

 

I don't expect someone to tell me what to do and what not to do, I don't need that nor want that. I just wish I had a friend that will be just that, a friend that'll listen to my problems.

 

What hurts me even more is for the last 4 years I've sat through rough times with her being there for her. I would be there for her whenever she needed a friend, I would sit on the phone and listen to her spill her guts out when she had problems.

 

Now it seems that I'm in need of that friend, and that friend isn't there for me. What am I to do, I emphasized to her that there is so much and I for once want it all to come out. I told her, I never told anyone any of this stuff and I wanted it to be her. But she never acted as if she had an interest in it nor cared and it hurts me even worse knowing that.

 

What can I say to her? It seems as if I can't get through to her that all I nneed is a friend that'll go for a walk with me or sit down or something to let me pour out everything that I want to come out? How can I tell her this?

 

Am I wrong for this? Am I insane? What can I do? Any advice is greatly appreciated.

[Paulie]

But...please elaborate first on why YOU THINK (albeit as off-base as you MAY BE) you have only one friend.

 

I'll get to why I ask later

 

And, in the meantime, remember something my grandmother told me a long time ago;

 

"there is always somebody worse off than you,"

 

AND

 

"Give Thanks that you do have that one friend...some people die without ever having even ONE friend."

 

...sounds harsh, but it's a reality. Stop and smell the roses a bit.

 

...and this is coming from somebody (me, Paulie) that has been diagnosed with everything under God's red Sun...depression, anxiety, O.C.D...and ALWAYS looked on the bright side. You will, too!!!

 

And, as we always recommend on this site, please continue this discussion on this site:\

 

But, if the need comes, all are welcome to personally e-mail me at <e-mail address removed>.

 

Beat of luck:

 

Paulie

[Joe]

Yes, there are people in this world that are worse off than I am. I am fortunate that my problems aren't major, in fact they're little compared to what other people has.

 

I never said my problems and issues were big, they aren't. For so long I have kept everything bottled up, my feelings, emotions, everything. Anyone that says that you don't need a friend to talk to is wrong, I sorta got that sense from your post because it's way off base.

 

My thing is, I came to a point in my life right now that I want to release all my feelings and emotions and everything I keep bottled up to the one friend that I do have. I don't want advice, I just need a friend that will listen to my problems as I have to hers.

 

For so many years I've stood behind this friend of mine, I have been there for her in the worst of times. I've always offered my shoulder to her to cry on. But now here it is reverse, me just wanting someone to talk to, and now it seems I'm left here in the dark alone.

 

I know to you this might not be a big deal, in fact some might find it retarded but that's ok. To me it is a big deal, I am unhappy with my life because I keep everything bottled up inside. I don't express saddness or anger because I don't want it to effect other people's life. I want other's to be happy, I know how saddness can bring others down. I don't want to do that.

 

I'm unsure whether my post was unclear or what because of your reply. I'm not sadden by the fact I have one friend, I'm greatful. I just want someone to talk to and with her being a friend in which I've been there for in the past could be here for me.

 

I just need to talk to someone, that's all. Everyone has a point in their life when they felt the urge just to talk to someone. It really does help you. I apologize if this maybe stupid to you, but to me it would mean the world to finally be able to let go of everything I kept bottled up.

 

It really plays around with my life, I want to let go and move on but I don't think it'll happen until I talk to someone and get it out in the open.

[chick]

in my opinion, everyone needs someone to talk to and trust me, you won't feel much better until you talk to someone. its unhealthy to bottle it all up.

 

i don't really know what to tell you about your friend, besides the fact that she sounds a little selfish....but maybe she won't really know what to say to you or maybe she is just too interested in herself and her own problems.

 

you mentioned that the thought of telling your problems to a complete stranger doesn't really appeal to you....but if i could in any way help you, i would love to because i know exactly what it feels like to have nobody to talk to. you can email me at <e-mail address removed>

 

i know it's not the same as being able to talk to someone in person but it may be a start!!!!

 

and as my grandmother once said......

 

"a problem shared is a problem halved!"