How many people get random flashbacks?

[wishyouneverleft]

Good evening,

 

I've deleted all her photos, blocked her on everything, NC for months, and don't even do any social media stalking. However, even though its been 4 months, I get flashbacks of the good times, and certain endearing moments. The smile, kissing her shoulder when she wore a certain shirt I liked. The smile, these breath taking moments where I was lost in her eyes and felt the world could fall apart and nothing mattered.

 

Am I the only one that's had that?

[Fever of love]

Good evening,

 

I've deleted all her photos, blocked her on everything, NC for months, and don't even do any social media stalking. However, even though its been 4 months, I get flashbacks of the good times, and certain endearing moments. The smile, kissing her shoulder when she wore a certain shirt I liked. The smile, these breath taking moments where I was lost in her eyes and felt the world could fall apart and nothing mattered.

 

Am I the only one that's had that?

 

All the time mate. And of course the sick thing is that your subconscious feeds you only the best and most glowing of memories, so you can torture yourself with them while you forget about the bad bits.

[HiCrunchy]

Happens to me everyday

[Frostedflake]

I used to until I started countering them with bad flashbacks.

Instead of giving into the sweet memories I'd interrupt them with a bad memory.

For example, thinking of the times they did or said something really crappy, when they stormed out, when they got in your face, etc. Promise you those good memories won't pop up anymore.

[Beachead]

Good evening,

 

I've deleted all her photos, blocked her on everything, NC for months, and don't even do any social media stalking. However, even though its been 4 months, I get flashbacks of the good times, and certain endearing moments. The smile, kissing her shoulder when she wore a certain shirt I liked. The smile, these breath taking moments where I was lost in her eyes and felt the world could fall apart and nothing mattered.

 

Am I the only one that's had that?

 

I get them everyday too man. Happened tonight as well. When it happens, it's like my heart just sinks and I'm out of it for awhile. The dreams are the worst.

[Logo]

All the time.

 

In the first few months each time it happened felt like a punch to the gut.

 

 

Nowadays it feels more like a random thought. But I woke up this morning and the memory of one particular morning overwhelmed me and I started thinking about that one time when I held her hand and thought to myself, “I hope this will last. I can’t imagine a world without her in my life.” I was afraid of losing her. I was afraid that any minute things would fall apart, for no real reason. It was just a fear.

 

 

But a few months later, it was a different reality, our feelings changed. We grew apart.

 

 

 

 

These days, in my weakest moments, my heart often yerarns for her, for the look in her eyes, the touch of her hand.

 

 

But I try to quickly think rationally and remind myself of why and how we got to were we did.

 

 

I wish things were different. But one can’t change reality.

[wishyouneverleft]

Thank you all, I take comfort in knowing I'm not the only one.

[sorano]

Happens to everyone. even if its a year, it will still happen. eventually it will get dull. But at times, it will hit you.

[Beachead]

I still get moments like this about my previous ex. A random thought will hit me and I'll remember something. It doesn't cripple me anymore. It's a dull ache that comes and goes quickly. And with my first ex, thoughts of her don't bother at all anymore. My current ex and thoughts of her cripple me still. I feel if I ever saw her again or heard from her, I'd probably collapse.

 

Today I drove by a place that reminded me of one the last memories we shared together. It was about how we were waiting in line to go on this rollercoaster and both me an her were just casually talking about our kids like it was all set in stone. I remember realizing what we were doing and just quietly enjoying watching her go on about our kids so normally. It didnt scare me at all. I wanted it. The interesting part about that conversation was she didn't want kids when we first started talking. Being with me changed her mind. So I teared up passing by the place. Still in denial and disbelief at times that she could leave with such ease. Makes me want to break no contact and just blow up her phone with messages until she replies. I just don't want her to become history but she slowly is and it's out of my hands.

[SevenCity]

I’ve found after a breakup, memories of many of my exes pop up.

 

The first 6 months of mine were crippling. Like I totally lost my chit. After that they hurt, but not as bad.

 

More recently (1.5 years post my recent ex) I’m starting to get them with more frequency. I think it stems back to not finding someone as good despite a lot of dating since I was dumped.

 

It’s hard not to when she lived in my house but I refuse to move because of this. I’ve changed a lot about me and my surroundings but it’s hard to get rid of memories. I can only hope my brain eventually forgets her like I’ve forgotten the previous exes. Usually that takes finding someone better.

[fieldoflavender]

Yeah I'm moving and I keep picking up bits and pieces of things he gave me etc. It just angers me. I had to throw out all these gift boxes. I keep thinking I got rid of everything, yet more stuff pops up. Good riddance, I'm hoping this move will clear all of his garbage away from me physically and mentally.

 

I keep getting reminders of people who didn't know and ask and it's awkward. But I get over it now - the people who need to know know and the other people MEH? I wasn't engaged for very long and wasn't with with him for very long and I learned the evils of Facebook, so no more sharing of my private life ever.

 

It's a sense of battling something though - sometimes when you feel that you can conquer it and get over it. Like I'm doing everything on my own, got rid of all of him, it's good.