wife is staying with friends - says she's "done"

[StoicHusband]

Broken people look for people that are more broken then themselves to have affairs with, helps them feel better about themselves without doing the work required.

 

That makes sense. I mean, I kinda figured. In fact I told her that's exactly why she left again and went back to him. Easy way to feel ok with herself. Sad, really.

 

The thing you need to realize is filing for divorce doesn't always mean the divorce will happen. Divorces take time, she has until the final decree to prove she's 100% for the marriage. What it does do is show her you are moving on with or without her. I promise you she will take your lawyer seriously when she is served. Just to be clear, she doesn't need your approval to divorce you.

 

I know you couldn't possibly read every post in the thread, but she's already filed. She did so like, two weeks after she left. It's a big damn rush for her. She's just trying to do anything to change her life because nothing is making her happy. When we "reconciled" she said how happy she was that I didn't sign the first time she asked. I told her the second time she left we need to do it as soon as possible. She ignored my message for 5 days then texted me on the first REAL day off I've had since the day she left (I work two jobs now and I finally took the day off - and tomorrow - from BOTH jobs. It was REALLY nice. lol) saying "you know my schedule, let me know when you're ready to sign".

 

I think you're kinda confused on my attitude toward the divorce. I'm not against it, not necessarily... I just feel like it's not what will make either of us happiest in the long run. Unfortunately she keeps texting me about it at the worst times possible. I sent her that message in an earlier post (page 14-15?) and then she ignored it for 5 days, then messages me while I'm sleeping in for a change, I woke up too late to get to a notary on saturday.

 

I'll sign the papers first chance I get, thing is, I don't know when that will be. Our work schedules are totally incompatible. I'm not in any hurry anyway. She's already lost her legal leg to stand on. She filed already and is at "fault" (we live in one of those states) so nothing she could do/say in court will matter toward any assets we get over that time. I doubt she'd ever hire a lawyer anyway. (Waste of weed money)

 

You are hung up on a woman that doesn't want to be with you. If any of us saw any hope for reconciliation we would suggest you take your time and really think things through. I just don't see that from what you have posted, her actions confirmed her position regarding you and your marriage.

 

Nah, not "hung up" at all. I love her unconditionally, sure... that's what a good husband does in my opinion. I'm not going to let it prevent me from trying new things and meeting new people tho. I just have a hard time in that dept because of things I've mentioned already... Work schedules, unfamiliarity with dating scene, never have had to meet a woman outside of a "high school"-like setting... I'll get past it eventually.

 

You're not really speaking to me on a lot of this, I hope I have helped to clarify. I have two mindsets on the issue:

1. Could we get past this? Yes. I believe that crisis is always an opportunity.

2. Can I move on? Yes. Because I firmly believe that crisis is an opportunity.

 

Take time to read more of my thread, I think you'll be surprised with how quickly my attitude about all this developed over the past two months.

 

Your goal is to get yourself out of infidelity as quickly as possible. The sooner you end things with her the sooner your healing will start. She is just plain not remorseful, it's like she wants to hurt you every chance she gets.

 

My goal is different with each mindset. I get what you're saying tho. Personally I feel like things with her are over. I don't need a piece of paper to feel that way, she does... She probably thinks she is "calling my bluff" on the divorce papers, but in reality I am just simply too busy. First evening I get off work I will go and sign. I have no issue with it anymore.

 

You will need independent counselling to help you get through this because you don't want to carry anything negative from this experience into your next relationship.

 

Pass. I have handled it well until this point and will continue to do so. I don't carry around negativity. <- period

 

My life has been hell and it has prepared me to face just about anything, including this. I will keep in mind your suggestion but given my past experience with counseling I doubt I'll ever seek out further services like it.

 

To answer you, yes, things are going a h*ll of a lot better for me.

 

That's good!

 

I took care of my situation, she is gone. She turned into a stalker and because of her actions I to this day remain unlisted.

 

Probably best, lol. I hope she stays away.

 

She attempted to take her own life, once before I moved out, twice after.

 

Scary... I can imagine that was unfortunate news to receive.

 

The only time I ever think about her now is when I refer to her when I post otherwise she is out of my life.

 

Really good.

 

My life is so much better without her. I am sort of retired(for the third time, lol, I was way too young the first time) but I sit on an Advisory Board for a world class Medical Company. My life is everything she ever wanted, call it Karma.

 

This is the kind of feeling I will have a hard time developing. I don't hold grudges well. My wife and I have shared ten wonderful years, during which we were both very happy. We accomplished so much in that time. It's hard for me to just cut her out of it because all of a sudden she's attracted to someone else and unable to pass the test that marriage/life has faced her with. The oath is "for better or worse, sickness and health" and I can't help but hear the tiny part of me that says she is just sick (even tho I know it is probably just "excuses" it still feels like an "explanation".)

 

--------------------------------------------

 

I feel sort of under attack recently on this thread. Sorry I have not developed the hatred for her that everyone seems so intent on seeing from me. I realize it would make things so much easier and perhaps one day it will come, but I very much doubt it. It's just not who I am.

 

I will most definitely move on, I will certainly be seeking new relationships, not just with women to date casually, but also with people that I would like to become friends with, as that is something that I am in short supply of. I know I need to "get a life" and am attempting to do so - every - single - day -. It's just difficult when I almost have no one with whom to do that.

 

Here's the hardest parts ya'll:

-I don't typically drink. I did with my wife, but mostly because she wanted to.

-I don't have many friends, the ones I do have are always busy with kids, married stuff, family, etc (or just other friends)

-My family/friends are all kinda lowlifes. I need new ones, flat-out.

-I don't have much time. I work two jobs, this week was 60+ hours, last week was 55, the week before that was 95 (no ****).

[Marc878]

Your life is and will be what you make it.

 

We all have that option.

 

Hating the STBXW gets you nothing.

 

Realizing who and what she is gets you everything because then you should know enough to stay as far away from that mess as possible.

 

There's nothing there but more of what you've already gotten.

 

Download and read "No More Mr Nice Guy" free PDF

[StoicHusband]

Download and read "No More Mr Nice Guy" free PDF

 

Reading the intro now, I am curious as to which of these "nice guy" traits you are under the impression that I possess. It doesn't sound like me - at all.

 

I love conflict. I say no any time I don't want to do something. I am somewhat a bad listener, this isn't uncommon among men in general tho. I don't look for "project" relationships. My sexuality/sex life have always been good and I've generally gotten what I want out of sex.

 

These things being said, there must be something that made you think of this book. I'd be interested to know what it is. Thanks in advance. -still reading-

[Marc878]

Reading the intro now, I am curious as to which of these "nice guy" traits you are under the impression that I possess. It doesn't sound like me - at all.

 

I love conflict. I say no any time I don't want to do something. I am somewhat a bad listener, this isn't uncommon among men in general tho. I don't look for "project" relationships. My sexuality/sex life have always been good and I've generally gotten what I want out of sex.

 

These things being said, there must be something that made you think of this book. I'd be interested to know what it is. Thanks in advance. -still reading-

 

It may or may not pertain to you at all. Your willingness to let your wayward wife decide or make the decision to stay married or not while she's in an affair. Waiting for her to come back when she was in her affair, etc is counter to your wellbeing. It maybe codependency but I think you need some help in that area regardless.

 

IMO it's definitely a boundary issue. You teach people how they can treat you.

Edited March 4, 2018 by Marc878

[aliveagain]

clarify. I have two mindsets on the issue:

 

1. Could we get past this? Yes. I believe that crisis is always an opportunity.

2. Can I move on? Yes. Because I firmly believe that crisis is an opportunity.

 

Take time to read more of my thread, I think you'll be surprised with how quickly my attitude about all this developed over the past two months.

 

 

 

My goal is different with each mindset. I get what you're saying tho. Personally I feel like things with her are over. I don't need a piece of paper to feel that way, she does... She probably thinks she is "calling my bluff" on the divorce papers, but in reality I am just simply too busy. First evening I get off work I will go and sign. I have no issue with it anymore.

 

 

 

This is the kind of feeling I will have a hard time developing. I don't hold grudges well. My wife and I have shared ten wonderful years, during which we were both very happy. We accomplished so much in that time. It's hard for me to just cut her out of it because all of a sudden she's attracted to someone else and unable to pass the test that marriage/life has faced her with.

The oath is "for better or worse, sickness and health" and I can't help but hear the tiny part of me that says she is just sick (even tho I know it is probably just "excuses" it still feels like an "explanation".)

--------------------------------------------

 

I feel sort of under attack recently on this thread. Sorry I have not developed the hatred for her that everyone seems so intent on seeing from me. I realize it would make things so much easier and perhaps one day it will come, but I very much doubt it. It's just not who I am.

 

I will most definitely move on, I will certainly be seeking new relationships, not just with women to date casually, but also with people that I would like to become friends with, as that is something that I am in short supply of. I know I need to "get a life" and am attempting to do so - every - single - day -. It's just difficult when I almost have no one with whom to do that.

 

Here's the hardest parts ya'll:

-I don't typically drink. I did with my wife, but mostly because she wanted to.

-I don't have many friends, the ones I do have are always busy with kids, married stuff, family, etc (or just other friends)

-My family/friends are all kinda lowlifes. I need new ones, flat-out.

-I don't have much time. I work two jobs, this week was 60+ hours, last week was 55, the week before that was 95 (no ****).

 

 

Please do not take my directness as an attack, what you may view as an attack from some is more likely only their frustration. Everyone travels at their own speed and those of us that have been around for a while see the actions that work with wayward spouses as well as the actions that don't. Nobody here wants to see you in pain because we know what that pain feels like, takes a long time to get rid of that horrible sinking feeling in your gut. You can't help but take a betrayal like infidelity personally because it is aimed directly at you. I recommend filing when the wayward spouse isn't dealing in reality, best way to end a fantasy. In your situation your wayward wife is the one that filed and to me that says she's done and most likely this is an exit affair. Delaying the process in a situation like that doesn't do anyone any good because it delays your healing, this is about you and your son. You can't control her and from what you have posted, sick or not, she is gone.

 

What most are attempting to do is to help you understand the reality of your situation. Take what works for you and disregard the rest. None of us are experts but can certainly tell you about our own experiences in hopes that you don't make the same mistakes many of us initially made and save you that pain, wasting of time and finances. Get control of what you can control and that is you. If you want to make divorce a long drawn out process, go for it, just keep in mind that no righteous woman will come near you as long as your married. You will survive this, the path and the journey are up to you. Just one more point, happy people don't get divorced. Maybe she wasn't happy, that's why communication is so important to a successful marriage.

Edited March 4, 2018 by aliveagain

[StoicHusband]

It may or may not pertain to you at all. Your willingness to let your wayward wife decide or make the decision to stay married or not while she's in an affair. Waiting for her to come back when she was in her affair, etc is counter to your wellbeing. It maybe codependency but I think you need some help in that area regardless.

 

IMO it's definitely a boundary issue. You teach people how they can treat you.

 

I'm all mixed up about it. tbh any advice is good advice. I'm still reading the book, I read anything I can get my hands on. I should be done with it in a few days time. I'll let you know what I can take away from it.

 

I don't feel like I was "waiting" tho. I mean I know what I want and yeah, I want it with her, for sure. But in the end it takes two to make that work. I told her when she comes back I am not interested if her heart is not in it. Apparently it's not.

 

This new guy is still just an escape from the issues in our marriage tho. I feel like she's just trying to find any way not to deal with her issues surrounding communication. That's an objective viewpoint btw.

 

It was just like it was before when she came back. She wouldn't talk, I talked for us, she ran off again. It's obviously never gonna work. I get that. Hope is still a bitch tho. I'm doing what I can to move on, working with what I've got.

 

Headed out with friends rn.

 

Please do not take my directness as an attack, what you may view as an attack from some is more likely only their frustration. Everyone travels at their own speed and those of us that have been around for a while see the actions that work with wayward spouses as well as the actions that don't. Nobody here wants to see you in pain because we know what that pain feels like, takes a long time to get rid of that horrible sinking feeling in your gut. You can't help but take a betrayal like infidelity personally because it is aimed directly at you. I recommend filing when the wayward spouse isn't dealing in reality, best way to end a fantasy. In your situation your wayward wife is the one that filed and to me that says she's done and most likely this is an exit affair. Delaying the process in a situation like that doesn't do anyone any good because it delays your healing, this is about you and your son. You can't control her and from what you have posted, sick or not, she is gone.

 

What most are attempting to do is to help you understand the reality of your situation. Take what works for you and disregard the rest. None of us are experts but can certainly tell you about our own experiences in hopes that you don't make the same mistakes many of us initially made and save you that pain, wasting of time and finances. Get control of what you can control and that is you. If you want to make divorce a long drawn out process, go for it, just keep in mind that no righteous woman will come near you as long as your married. You will survive this, the path and the journey are up to you. Just one more point, happy people don't get divorced. Maybe she wasn't happy, that's why communication is so important to a successful marriage.

 

Oh no, the directness doesn't bother me. It's the assumptions and so on, when the info about it has already been posted. It's as if you're assigning your emotions to me. This happened frequently in the beginning of the thread and once it was sorted out the advice I got after was much more helpful.

 

The fact that she filed really doesn't say much at all. She's childish and impulsive. She admitted she wishes she hadn't done so when she was back. The fact is she really isn't sure what the hell she is doing - at all -. Everyone here makes it out like she's some kinda mastermind when in fact this is a lost little girl lol. I know it doesn't excuse it but it's only my attempt to explain it.

 

About happy people not getting divorced... She's obviously shown that she wasn't happy with certain aspects of our marriage. I understand that completely. The problem I face with it is that she left when things were getting better - not worse. It's odd. It defies all logic, but logic certainly doesn't seem to pertain to her much anyway.

 

Communication - yes. That's a must for my next serious relationship, which I'm sure will be a long way off. I'm not an impulsive little girl, so I'm not in a rush for that. I would like, however, to date, make friends and build some kinda life outside of work/home. That's where I'm stuck.

 

I know what I'm doing dealing with her now, but honestly I'm just tired of being made to look like a sadsack who sits around waiting on his cheating wife. That's honestly not the case. I'm out there, visiting the few friends I have, making money, taking my son out, trying new things, building a life... and I come back to the thread to see basically insulting comments.

 

I'm not trying to say that I don't appreciate the replies... because I do. I just feel like they don't speak to ME very much at all. At least not where I am right now. They're just general replies that one would say to a needy, begging, pleading, watery mess. I've handled this all very well. Anyone who knows me would say so. It has been two months... consider that.

[StoicHusband]

Finally made it out to a bar that was recommended, but has know, Sunday. Figured I should see how beer sits with me these days.

 

Seems like a nice place. I could chill here, and I'm digging the beer. I think bars aren't so out if the question. That is sort of encouraging....

 

 

Hung out with a buddy with our boys, now in here drinking a beer, nice lil Sunday.

 

Just not many people it right now (duh) lol

[StoicHusband]

HAHA, everyone in there thought I was this other guy. I tried telling them, but there were so many people crowding me out. I got pretty messed up last night and I really enjoyed myself. I think I like beer a lot more than I think I do.

 

They were all so happy to see (him) me and I wanna go back and meet my doppelganger sometime. He must be a total ****ing riot!

 

I feel like I opened a door last night, I now know I can enjoy hanging out in bars and that is a relief. I am totally confused lately and don't even know who I am. It's like I'm coming out of a coma after ten years. I really look forward to going back.

 

Thanks to everyone for all the replies, even the scammer. Looking forward to hearing from you guys again.

[aliveagain]

Can't wait to read your post after you get laid(don't mean that in any sick kind of way). I am living all your first's with you, I know exactly what your feeling, been there. I recall one morning looking at myself in the mirror, I was shaving when it hit me, why am I shaving, I don't have to go to an office, who's going to see me, who am I doing this for, I'm the only one here? I made it a point to start new routines just for me. I buy fresh flowers every week(actually a couple dozen of whatever is in season) and have them all over my home. I order in at least once during the month and buy a bottle of the best Scotch I can afford. These things are only for me. I date but am not committed to any one woman, not ready for that. As some on here who have become my friends on Facebook know I have a lot of female friends. That's not a bad thing, it just happens to be where I am right now. If ever I get with someone, I am a one woman man. Guess what I am saying to you is enjoy these new experiences.

[StoicHusband]

Can't wait to read your post after you get laid(don't mean that in any sick kind of way). I am living all your first's with you, I know exactly what your feeling, been there. I recall one morning looking at myself in the mirror, I was shaving when it hit me, why am I shaving, I don't have to go to an office, who's going to see me, who am I doing this for, I'm the only one here? I made it a point to start new routines just for me. I buy fresh flowers every week(actually a couple dozen of whatever is in season) and have them all over my home. I order in at least once during the month and buy a bottle of the best Scotch I can afford. These things are only for me. I date but am not committed to any one woman, not ready for that. As some on here who have become my friends on Facebook know I have a lot of female friends. That's not a bad thing, it just happens to be where I am right now. If ever I get with someone, I am a one woman man. Guess what I am saying to you is enjoy these new experiences.

 

How long has it been since you started this "journey" (just curious).

 

I am enjoying it, that's why I was so adamant about the posts that were coming in, I'm really not pathetic. I know my life has to move on. The most pathetic thing I did today was to ignore a perfectly good time to meet up and sign her papers. I just don't care enough... It's not what I wanna be doing. I stayed late and bull****ted with the boss instead.

 

She always treated me like I was at her disposal. I ****ing hate that. I'm not going to jump thru hoops for her and I don't care what it makes her think. I'll contact her and sign the papers next week after I've spent some time on myself. I'm going back out to that bar again. I felt GREAT after a few beers and really enjoyed my music on the way home/in the parking lot.

 

I have a haircut/beard trim scheduled and I'm looking at new cars this week. I've worked my ass off for these things and I'm going to enjoy them. I love myself, I really do. I've never felt that way before but I feel it now so much.

 

I am gonna be alright. Yes, I want to reconcile, but she's shown she doesn't. We don't always get what we want, do we? I'll be fine and I will probably come out of this better-off than she does. She's already getting fat and is super depressed and her new bf sounds like a tool.

 

I appreciate the response, and yes, I'll definitely be crowing about it when I find some action. It's definitely something I'm leaving myself open for, even though I've never had to "hook up" as an adult. I am confident I can make it happen. I'm funny, smart, can hold a conversation, I'm not unfortunate-looking, I have money in the bank, I've got a wonderful home and I own my own vehicle even if it is falling apart, it's mine... (first thing I wanna change is that car tho lol)

 

I'm gonna be alright. Headed out to the bar again, wish me luck.

[Cullenbohannon]

Control yourself. Take it out in the gym, not the bar.

[Marc878]

When you put it out there that "you'll still be waiting" she'll take that as I can do anything I want to him and he'll always be there.

 

I've said before "weakness is unnattractive" most women have zero respect for a pushover.

 

If you don't change that you've got a very long road to travel.

[StoicHusband]

Control yourself. Take it out in the gym, not the bar.

 

Oh man, don't read into that. This city is boring. The bar is the place to chill. I'm just trying to meet people. Not trying to get ****ed up.

 

When you put it out there that "you'll still be waiting" she'll take that as I can do anything I want to him and he'll always be there.

 

I've said before "weakness is unnattractive" most women have zero respect for a pushover.

 

If you don't change that you've got a very long road to travel.

 

I'm not waiting, seriously. I took your advice seriously. I'm having fun and doing my thing. I won't wait forever but I can't sayI think her mindset is permanent. If you asked her ten years ago if she'd ever feel the way she does now, shed day no. Ask her now if she'll ever be attracted again, she'd say the same. Doesn't make either true.

 

Thanks you guys.

[Cullenbohannon]

What you discount is if YOU will be attracted to her in 10 months, let alone 10 years.

 

How fast do you think her "attraction" will come back if you get another woman.

 

Get in shape and always look sharp. Take care of your business and in 10 months you wont remember her name and the rounds will be on you.

 

Mid 40s, getting married in a couple of months.

Edited March 6, 2018 by Cullenbohannon

[StoicHusband]

What you discount is if YOU will be attracted to her in 10 months, let alone 10 years.

 

I haven't. I am as fluid as any person. I know my perception of her can change. I see it happening already. I see the women around me and many of them are much more attractive than my wife is. If I'm honest, I'm not much attracted to her at all anymore. I love her, but the attraction would have to be regained. It happens in long-term relationships. Every relationship has this struggle of attraction coming and going.

 

How fast do you think her "attraction" will come back if you get another woman. Women know that they can "control" a good man with love. They believe they can always come back, until another comes into the picture.

 

Pretty fast. That's one concern I carry. I could seriously **** a lot of stuff up if I don't watch my step.

 

Straighten up. Get in shape. Always look sharp and take care of your business. In 10 months you wont remember her name and the rounds will be on you.

 

Thanks, doing just that. In the best shape of my life since she left, making more money than I ever have. I doubt I'll ever forget her. We truly did share something special. I won't let it become a sore spot.

 

Mid 40s, getting married in a couple of months.

 

Congratulations, good luck.

[StoicHusband]

idgaf I've been having a great time at the bar. I met a lot of people so far, more than I met in my entire marriage. I have had so much fun and tonight I met like a whole group of dudes who really enjoyed my company. They are all in relationships but they have parties and they said I'm invited to the next one.

 

I have such hope rn. I meet people I work hard and I have no problem with my life even if it is what most would call "lonely" I don't feel lonely except I'm alone... That's a big difference.

[Bigboss2903]

glad you doing okay dude, i'm doing the same thing started to gym (results starting to show) still have my off days though so im not perfect, those days bad come i sit with and work my emotions out, we both unblocked each other from whatsapp (her choice) and we message and talk now and then no rush for me as i dont want my daughter to see or hear any conflict especially from me....

 

Im sure im on the right path of healing because i can feel it!

[DKT3]

idgaf I've been having a great time at the bar. I met a lot of people so far, more than I met in my entire marriage. I have had so much fun and tonight I met like a whole group of dudes who really enjoyed my company. They are all in relationships but they have parties and they said I'm invited to the next one.

 

I have such hope rn. I meet people I work hard and I have no problem with my life even if it is what most would call "lonely" I don't feel lonely except I'm alone... That's a big difference.

 

Addition by subtraction isn't a myth

[StoicHusband]

glad you doing okay dude, i'm doing the same thing started to gym (results starting to show) still have my off days though so im not perfect, those days bad come i sit with and work my emotions out, we both unblocked each other from whatsapp (her choice) and we message and talk now and then no rush for me as i dont want my daughter to see or hear any conflict especially from me....

 

Im sure im on the right path of healing because i can feel it!

 

I really do wish you the best. Take good care of that girl. Whatever else happens, at least do that. I imagine it's much harder when the person can't just be out of your life... I got lucky I guess

 

Addition by subtraction isn't a myth

 

I looked this up, mainly because I didn't have the privilege of being coached, ever in my life. I think it's a great concept. I really believe that is what has happened here. I still get sad thinking of how much I have to share and having no one to share it with.

 

------------------------------------------------------------------

UPDATE:

 

I have been doing great, got myself a haircut and beard trim, I think it looks fantastic. I managed to get out with some friends last night. I am in the market for a new car. I have been looking around and weighing my options.

 

I haven't decided whether to buy an older one outright, or to take on payments and keep a little "cushion" in the bank. I think I'd like something newer, maybe I'll compromise and get something in between.

 

I have been enjoying hanging out at a bar, tho I think I overdid it on missing sleep and wound up getting a little bit sick. I'll feel better after the weekend I'm sure.

 

I'd really love to hear from the people who have been following my thread from the beginning. I appreciate you guys a lot and I still check in here, tho I never am sure what to say. Just know that - with me- "no news is good news". lol

 

Hoping you're all well

[Marc878]

Buy a late model with low miles.

 

I like convertibles. Everyone should have that experience once.

[Just a Guy]

Hi stoic, get a Mustang in good shape if possible. Especially if it's souped up! Just saying.

[Marc878]

Convertibles are chic magnets. DO IT!!!!!!!

[aliveagain]

The car that was the most fun for me was a Mercedes CLK 430 AMG. Big V8, snapped your neck when you booted it(4 seater so you could take another couple with you). Hated the way they treated their customers in service. I had more women asked me for dates in that car then any other car I ever owned. The next most fun car was my 68 Camaro SS. Get the best you can afford, reliability is important. If you can write it off consider a lease that way you can upgrade yourself every 2 years. Once your intimate with another woman, your WW spouse won't take up as much room in your head, you'll be too into her to care about the ex.

[mrs rubble]

Convertibles are chic magnets. DO IT!!!!!!!

They work on blokes too, I get lots of comments about mine from strangers, just this morning at the lights a truck pulled up next to me and wound down his window to say "nice car".

[StoicHusband]

Buy a late model with low miles.

 

I like convertibles. Everyone should have that experience once.

 

This is a serious thought.

 

Hi stoic, get a Mustang in good shape if possible. Especially if it's souped up! Just saying.

 

I have considered that, because they do have convertibles and they're domestic so possibly less cost for maintenance.

 

Convertibles are chic magnets. DO IT!!!!!!!

 

I think you sold me on it.

 

The car that was the most fun for me was a Mercedes CLK 430 AMG. Big V8, snapped your neck when you booted it(4 seater so you could take another couple with you). Hated the way they treated their customers in service. I had more women asked me for dates in that car then any other car I ever owned. The next most fun car was my 68 Camaro SS. Get the best you can afford, reliability is important. If you can write it off consider a lease that way you can upgrade yourself every 2 years. Once your intimate with another woman, your WW spouse won't take up as much room in your head, you'll be too into her to care about the ex.

 

I know that's right. I need to get some action and it'll all be downhill after that. I just haven't had any luck - yet. It's still early in the game.

 

I can't write anything off, so the lease isn't smart for me. Great thing to know tho. Really good advice.

 

Are imports really expensive to insure? I am considering it because they are so nice, but I don't wanna be stuck with a car I can't repair/insure.

 

They work on blokes too, I get lots of comments about mine from strangers, just this morning at the lights a truck pulled up next to me and wound down his window to say "nice car".

 

I don't think that was the car... It just gave him something to say besides "Yo baby, WHAT'S UP!?!" But good for u.