Online dating profile review [updated: profile review v2]

[max3732]

My man, this is a very generic profile. Everybody is funny in their own ways. Do not directly say you're funny and witty. Say something that's funny and witty. Actions speak louder than words. I'm a funny guy, but you'll never know it unless you meet me in person. That's why it's best to leave it off your profile.

 

Also, no need to bring money in the equation. I'm a sports writer, I don't make a whole lot of money, and I land lots of dates. Instead, put that you're college educated, like I do. That's attractive and will win you good women.

 

Lastly, a simple sentence stating I'm athletic or I work out is sufficient enough. Tell her about your tennis hobbies later down the road.

 

This would be perfect: I'm a lover of food, an exotic traveling photographer, college educated, and an athlete. Throw in a funny or witty statement at the end if you'd like.

 

Great suggestions! What about being a gentleman? It's not just something I made up for the profile. People really do comment on that about me.

[olivetree]

Great suggestions! What about being a gentleman? It's not just something I made up for the profile. People really do comment on that about me.

 

A true gentleman never claims to be.

Let a woman discover that.

[losangelena]

A true gentleman never claims to be.

Let a woman discover that.

 

I agree with this! I once had a roommate who would always talk about how "awesome" she was, and we were like, "you need to let other people say that about you; you sound conceited," and she'd always counter with, "well it's true!," which it might have been, but she just sounded like the biggest cow because of it.

 

I think, OP, that you need to let the women you meet determine for themselves whether or not you're a gentleman, and you can only do that by showing them that side of you. If I came across your profile and read that, I would think, "yeah, sure, alright."

[max3732]

I agree with this! I once had a roommate who would always talk about how "awesome" she was, and we were like, "you need to let other people say that about you; you sound conceited," and she'd always counter with, "well it's true!," which it might have been, but she just sounded like the biggest cow because of it.

 

I think, OP, that you need to let the women you meet determine for themselves whether or not you're a gentleman, and you can only do that by showing them that side of you. If I came across your profile and read that, I would think, "yeah, sure, alright."

 

I guess I feel the need to write a lot of things down that I'd hope people would discover later because with online dating so far I almost never get a response at all, so there's no chance for someone to get to know you beyond what she sees in the profile.

 

When I have gone out I've met some strange women, or ones that pepper me with questions like a job interview and very rarely get a chance to just be myself. With my last girlfriend we got to know each other by seeing each other just about everyday in school and she told me she was impressed how she saw me treating other people.

 

With limited characters and a few pictures I just don't know how to get someone to actually meet me and get something truthful about my personality out there. Should I also use the space to say what kind of woman I'm interested in?

[losangelena]

I guess I feel the need to write a lot of things down that I'd hope people would discover later because with online dating so far I almost never get a response at all, so there's no chance for someone to get to know you beyond what she sees in the profile.

 

When I have gone out I've met some strange women, or ones that pepper me with questions like a job interview and very rarely get a chance to just be myself. With my last girlfriend we got to know each other by seeing each other just about everyday in school and she told me she was impressed how she saw me treating other people.

 

With limited characters and a few pictures I just don't know how to get someone to actually meet me and get something truthful about my personality out there. Should I also use the space to say what kind of woman I'm interested in?

This is a common challenge but one unique to online dating. You have very little space to make an impression, and I'd argue that very few ODP really accurately convey who a person is.

 

A couple of thoughts:

 

If you find yourself on a date where the woman is treating it like a job interview, then end that date and get the heck out of there. You want ultimately find someone with whom you can be yourself, and sure, it takes a while to get that comfortable, but chances are, you probably won't ever be compatible with someone who approaches dating in that way.

 

I do think Jj66's example (post #72 of this thread on page five) is a great example. It's playful, it hits several pertinent details (height, booze preference, body type, activities) without sounding too much like a list, and is written in a way that addresses who he is and the type of woman he's interested in. It also includes a "call to action," in this case, "swipe right."

 

I think your raw material is fine. It's how you present it that causes problems. Leave out broad strokes that apply to everyone. It's nearly a universal reality that people are active and also want to relax. Don't mention that. Ditto for watching comedies and action flicks. Unless you are VERY enthusiastic about kung-fu movies or nature documentaries, then it doesn't need to be mentioned, as almost everyone enjoys a diverse array of entertainment.

 

How about:

 

"Old-school gentlemen with penchant for travel photography, reading, chocolate-making, and all things Disney. My favorite way to spend a Saturday morning is to dominate the tennis court, then demolish a plate of waffles afterward. Looking for a well-read doubles partner with a taste for breakfast food. Swipe right if you have your own racquet."

 

That's not perfect either, and obviously you don't need to find a woman who is into exactly what you're into, but that is a less-wordy way of saying it. But you want to be brief and specific. That way, women will read the entire thing, and will have something to talk about if they want to message you.

[max3732]

This is a common challenge but one unique to online dating. You have very little space to make an impression, and I'd argue that very few ODP really accurately convey who a person is.

 

A couple of thoughts:

 

If you find yourself on a date where the woman is treating it like a job interview, then end that date and get the heck out of there. You want ultimately find someone with whom you can be yourself, and sure, it takes a while to get that comfortable, but chances are, you probably won't ever be compatible with someone who approaches dating in that way.

 

I do think Jj66's example (post #72 of this thread on page five) is a great example. It's playful, it hits several pertinent details (height, booze preference, body type, activities) without sounding too much like a list, and is written in a way that addresses who he is and the type of woman he's interested in. It also includes a "call to action," in this case, "swipe right."

 

I think your raw material is fine. It's how you present it that causes problems. Leave out broad strokes that apply to everyone. It's nearly a universal reality that people are active and also want to relax. Don't mention that. Ditto for watching comedies and action flicks. Unless you are VERY enthusiastic about kung-fu movies or nature documentaries, then it doesn't need to be mentioned, as almost everyone enjoys a diverse array of entertainment.

 

How about:

 

"Old-school gentlemen with penchant for travel photography, reading, chocolate-making, and all things Disney. My favorite way to spend a Saturday morning is to dominate the tennis court, then demolish a plate of waffles afterward. Looking for a well-read doubles partner with a taste for breakfast food. Swipe right if you have your own racquet."

 

That's not perfect either, and obviously you don't need to find a woman who is into exactly what you're into, but that is a less-wordy way of saying it. But you want to be brief and specific. That way, women will read the entire thing, and will have something to talk about if they want to message you.

 

I looked at the example from Jj66 and see what you mean. The one you shortened my example seemed pretty good, but I think it's too much about breakfast foods and I'm also not only interested in women who play tennis and are well read (but that would certainly be a plus).

[losangelena]

I looked at the example from Jj66 and see what you mean. The one you shortened my example seemed pretty good, but I think it's too much about breakfast foods and I'm also not only interested in women who play tennis and are well read (but that would certainly be a plus).

 

Sure. Like I said, it's only an example (based on info you've written about yourself already). I was trying to give you an example of tone/length/style, etc. Fill in the words as you want.

[max3732]

Sure. Like I said, it's only an example (based on info you've written about yourself already). I was trying to give you an example of tone/length/style, etc. Fill in the words as you want.

 

I signed up for it today. There are some strange women on here, but also some that I'm interested in. Hopefully I'll meet someone with this.