Married woman, are you getting the level of sex with your husband that you desire?

[wmacbride]

This is a spinoff from another thread...

 

If you are a married woman, are you getting the level of sex with your husband that you desire? If the answer is "no", then why is that? What do you feel would improve things for you and your spouse in that department?

 

If you are married woman who is satisfied with the level of sex in your relationship, what do you feel has made that possible? Do you have any advice/tips/ suggestions for others that you would like to share?

Edited January 10, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
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[RecentChange]

There was a time when the flame was just flickering and I wasn't getting enough. Honestly we just weren't investing in each other like we should be, and the lack of sex (not dried up, but at the time going 10 days between wasn't unusual).

 

What fixed things? Talking about it. Openly, needs and wants, understanding the role making your partner feel desires plays.

 

Now? Lately.... Man we have been on fire. Tons of sex and I love it - it's fun! I am literally going into the office a hour late right now because we ended up having sex this morning - more than my schedule allowed.

 

Now... All of that said, both of us have cheated at points in the past. Call it hysterical bonding I suppose, but it has lasted for years.

[Els]

Can LTRs share?

[wmacbride]

Can LTRs share?

 

Sounds good to me

[Els]

Sounds good to me

 

Yay!

 

I'm very happy with the quality of sex we have, and mostly okay with the frequency. I could admittedly do with a slightly higher frequency; however, given the SO's work schedule, it is simply impossible to have the quality of sex that I need with a higher frequency, unless we do literally nothing else together on his work days besides eat dinner, have sex, and sleep. He has been very clear that he doesn't want to do that, nor do I really want to either... so we do as much as we reasonably can and I masturbate once or twice during the week.

 

I believe things will improve once he gets past this phase in his career - however, we'd be in our mid 30s then and if we do decide to have children, that will be the time. So not sure what the overall outcome will be in this regard, lol.

 

I'm not sure if I'm qualified to give advice in this regard, but if I can, I'd strongly echo RC's advice re: making your partner feel desired. I personally think this is really important for both genders.

 

Also, I just read the thread that (I think?) this is a spinoff from - I would add that I didn't find milestones (or "sealed deals") to negatively impact the frequency or quality of sex in and of themselves. We actually are legally accorded the same rights (and liabilities) as married couples where we live(d), and we crossed that bridge several years back.

[wheresthelove]

No. The answer to the first question is no. We have been together over ten years. I am 43 and he is 48. We are hitting our middle ages and I think that has a lot to do with it. Actually its more like a sexless marriage. I am ready to leave because it's been an issue for too long. No idea what else to do. I've bought the outfits, gone to counseling, and stopped pressuring him. Can't say that once every two months was enough for me. Eventually I got emotionally attached to someone else for a while, which didn't help us. Now, it's back to the same old thing after six years since the emotional affair. I'm also trying to figure this out.