Deciding where to go on a date

[gbe2015]

As a guy it's usually expected I will decide what to do one the first date, maybe even the 2nd. But at what point should the girl start putting in effort? If you ask them what they'd like to do and you get no suggestions are they just letting you take the lead or are they just being lazy/not interested? She seems happy whereever we go and sincerely thanks me. But she never pays (doesn't offer) and never asks me out so I'm starting to think she's using me. She doesn't seem they type to do that though (she seems shy) but it's starting to look like a red flag to me.

 

How many dates would you allow this to go on before saying something, and what would you say? I've been thinking of just saying let's get together again and leaving it at that, see if she pursues me and asks me out.

 

I compare this to a girl I went to dinner with yesterday for the first time, I paid but she said next dinner she will pay. That seems normal to me.

[d0nnivain]

When I was dating in the beginning, I always let the guy chose because I have expensive taste & didn't want to make it seem like I was expecting a free meal. Based on where he took me, by date 3-4 I could better gage his comfort level Around that point, she should be paying & making some suggestions.

[Steve51]

I dated a lot and as the man, picked the places, gave the girl a choice of a few or asked her to recommend a place. That covers all the bases. My wife drives me nuts because she refuses to make decisions like that. Her reply is always, "Pick one you like." If I tell her to decide we go back and forth all night so I just make the decisions and save us both a lot of time.

 

Try my pre-marital approach. As I said it gives you the opportunity to recommend a place, supply a short list for her to choose from or to pick a place that she would enjoy. You will never get in to trouble like this.