Signs a woman/man is interested in you?

[I'veseenbetterlol]

I decided to make a positive post and yes this applies to both men and women. This comes from quite a bit of online and real life dating experience.

 

1. The person makes a date w/you ASAP w/out waiting, there have been instances where a guy texts me for months and we never met up/

 

2. They don't lead the conversation on about sex or try to get to come to their room/house (this applies to people wo want a relationship, not a hookup).

 

3. If they cancel a date, they let you know in advance, its real emergency (family emergency) and they are apologetic about the incident. Usually they will offer to reschedule.

 

4. The person does not love bomb from the very start. This will most likely lead to them becoming very hot/cold as you take interest.

 

5. Pretty consistent texting. I find it interesting how many excuses everyone has for people taking a day or more to text back, there is no excuse period. If a person like you, they will text. Took me awhile to find out that "bad" texters don't exist.

 

6. They do not make excuses for why things won't work, especially if they are the ones who wanted a relationship in the 1st place. Its me not you, I'm not ready for a relationship etc, all complete BS!

 

7. They don't talk about other men/women in front of you.

 

8. Behavior is consistent, the hold/cold thing means they aren't interested.

 

9. Someone who wants to be w/you, is not going to play games, they let you know right away.

 

Feel free to add!

 

 

 

7.

[Maggie4]

With online dating, people don't know whether or not they're interested until they meet in person. Finally face to face, you need clues to figure out what's the verdict.

 

In real life, he is interested if he asks you out on a date.

[JimmyNYC]

hey great list. Can you explain number four in more detail? I think you're onto something there as I may have been victim to that progression. what do you mean by love bomb? Can you give examples? And if they do that how do you know that they run hot and cold after that? And why did they run hot and cold after that? What's the correlation between love bombing and then running hot and cold? Is it to that person is just mental?

[basil67]

I'd argue against #2. I know a number of people (myself and my hubby included) who have started out in their long term relationships/marriages by getting physical really early. We're talking first date sex here. Getting physical early doesn't indicate either way if a person does or doesn't want a relationship.

 

#3. It doesn't have to be a family emergency. It could also happen to a person who's on call for work. But yes, they will reschedule.

[I'veseenbetterlol]

hey great list. Can you explain number four in more detail? I think you're onto something there as I may have been victim to that progression. what do you mean by love bomb? Can you give examples? And if they do that how do you know that they run hot and cold after that? And why did they run hot and cold after that? What's the correlation between love bombing and then running hot and cold? Is it to that person is just mental?

 

Here is my story about it. A guy was into me from the 1st message (you are perfect, gorgeous etc), pretty much all over me the 1st date, then the 2nd date he started to back off a bit and ended up doing shady things. I think the person likes the challenge, something new, then they grow bored.

[Cookiesandough]

great list.

[Shanex]

He has a tent in his pants when he is talking to the woman?

 

Sorry guys, couldnt resist!

[MeadowFlower]

Avoid the love bombers like you would a tornado.

[greymatter]

Here is my story about it. A guy was into me from the 1st message (you are perfect' date=' gorgeous etc), pretty much all over me the 1st date, then the 2nd date he started to back off a bit and ended up doing shady things. I think the person likes the challenge, something new, then they grow bored.[/quote']

 

I mean this kindly, but I don't think his first message to you was an indication of strong interest. It sounds like very generic first message content from someone who is sending dozens of messages a night to women and trying to get any response. I may be the odd one out but anyone who approaches me that way gets ignored. I'm looking for more substance and friendly but not overly familiar. And he was all over you in the first date which is aggressive, then he showed even worse behavior? Sounds like the type I avoid completely. Yuck.

[Cookiesandough]

#5. Preach!!!

[carhill]

Me:"I'm new in town, just moved here"

 

Her: "Maybe I'll see you around"

 

Said the lady collecting cans and bottles at my door

 

That's about as close as it ever gets for me. I mean, what attractive young lady (young to me anyway) is out in the forest collecting cans and bottles? If not so mesmerized by her eyes I would've been looking over her shoulder for a shooter more than I did

 

This thread is far less attended than the 'not interested' thread so I figured I'd add some content.

 

In the past, essentially it was always myself asking women on dates and them saying anything other than no and showing up. 'Interest' varied markedly. Most guys I know define interest in sexual terms but I'm not an early/casual sex guy so it's a bit trickier.

 

The last woman who showed clear interest in her body language, gaze, and focus on me over time I did do the vetting, she did turn out to be married so I left it alone. Funny thing was, when she did get divorced about a year later, we still had interaction but that 'stuff' was gone, then I was reminded of that being typical of MW's. It wasn't necessarily that she was 'interested' in me personally, rather she was putting out that 'I'm available' vibe while still married and I picked up on it. Plenty of other guys did too.

[SevenCity]

One aspect that is completely absent from this list is interest has varied levels. Especially with OLD.

 

Women notoriously have low investment initially, but that can change after a first meet. I’ve had it happen to me more than once where a woman acted luke warm then ended up having sex with her after a few dates.

 

I actually had one who didn’t want to see me again and has now boarded on obsession.

 

The opposite is also true; they could have high interest initially and take a sharp decline 3 minutes after you meet.

 

I’ll add the following in relation to OLD:

 

1) Asks questions about you

 

2) Gives full lengthy responses

 

3) Enthusiastically agrees to meet

 

4) Is flexible with the meeting place so it is convenient for both

 

5) is willing to come to your place rather than always going to hers

 

It’s pretty easy to see when someone has high interest, the trick is picking up on the “maybes” and turning it into high interest.

Edited January 13, 2018 by SevenCity

[I'veseenbetterlol]

I mean this kindly, but I don't think his first message to you was an indication of strong interest. It sounds like very generic first message content from someone who is sending dozens of messages a night to women and trying to get any response. I may be the odd one out but anyone who approaches me that way gets ignored. I'm looking for more substance and friendly but not overly familiar. And he was all over you in the first date which is aggressive, then he showed even worse behavior? Sounds like the type I avoid completely. Yuck.

 

I pretty much figured that out, learned the hard way. This was a hard lesson to learn, but from then on I was able to filter out those who wanted nothing more then sex.