Gypsy7 Posted August 24, 2005 Share Posted August 24, 2005 Having a rough time with this. I have been dating a girl who I firmly believe is the love of my life. HArd to put into words how great things have been, but I met her while at grad school, and we were together a year before I had to go off to work. She is currently in her last term of school. Up until a month ago, things were great. Even helped her spend a month in Italy, to study the language. We never fight, talk all the time, and have all the "small things" that make a relationship great. However, last month she expressed to me that she is confused and does not understand what is going on in her head. Rather distressed, she told me that she still loves me, but the future is scaring her a bit, because of almost being out of school, not knowing about marriage, career, etc. She came out to visit me in California for a week and everything was good as usual, but we were both stressed out a bit from the tension, and eventually she decided to take a break from the relationship. I am heartbroken about this. Don't want us to see other people, etc. I have FULLY explained how I feel about her, etc, and there is no doubt she knows where my heart stands, and that I will love her forever, no matter what she chooses. We both have discussed marriage, kids, etc, but it was even explained during all this that I just want to live together, and not rush her. I would go anywhere she wanted for her career. Being a Chemical Engineer, I can work almost anywhere. The biggest kicker is....she tells me she still loves me and she sees our future and that she does not want to let me go completely out of her life. Yet, she wants me to be happy, so tells me I can do what I wish, date, etc. I do not wish for anything but to try and salvage our relationship. There is no closer to the relationship, as she will freely admit it is her fault and has to sort some stuff out. I remind her that SHE is what I want, and I am happy with her, so I'm not giving up. I just don't understand....is it just jitters? She is younger than me (only 22, while I am 29), but what should I do? The feelings are there....I have tried everything. How can I get through to her? Have dated a lot of women....but they all lead to me finding the one that truely could make me happy forever, and hopefully, vice versa. Link to post Share on other sites
sundrop Posted August 24, 2005 Share Posted August 24, 2005 If you have told her how you feel about her than she knows and you have gotten through to her. I don't really think there is much more you can tell her, to make her want to change her mind right now. I would only imagine that going from school to work force, will be stress full. (I went stright from high school to the work force and going to school at night) It's scarry, because now everybody expects her to get a great job etc.. Maye she is scarred.... Maybe she just needs this time to find herself..... But really, the only thing you can do is give her her space she ask for, if you push her to stay in the relationship when she ask for space then you will just push her away. As hard as it will be, give her the space she needs. If you can, be a freind and be there when she needs you, but don't let walk all over you and use you either. If you can't be friend with her right now, let her know that too. Sometimes it is just to hard to be friends with an ex..... Hope this helps a little. I wish you the best. Right now, you need to take care of yourself and don't put your life on hold. Link to post Share on other sites
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