Jolene Posted August 24, 2005 Share Posted August 24, 2005 After preganancy and childbirth, how did you (to the guys) or how did your husband (to the gals) handle the fact that the mother's body is not the same and may never be again. Specifically, as it relates to the obvious weight gain that is usually temporary but significant for up to a one year period. I have one child and I am actually even smaller now than I was prior to having a child, but I was not married and did not have to worry about how big I got during the pregnancy. I tried to maintain as much control over it as I could, but still...it happened. When I look back at how big I got, I shudder to think it could happen like that again with my fiancé when we have another child. I think all men like to make you believe it doesn't matter, but at least half of them are revolted at the thought of the weight gain. Am I wrong? Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted August 24, 2005 Share Posted August 24, 2005 When I was pregnant both times, I gained right around 20 lbs with both my little people... BUT one of my babies were 8lbs Babies... Being small anyway, I looked more like I had a basketball under my shirt, but didn't really begin to show until I was about 5 months along... and I can honestly say my babies Dad didn't mind at all that I was getting bigger... in fact we had amazing sex when I was pregnant.... I lost all my baby wieght almost right away, and because I breast fed, lost even more rapidly... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jolene Posted August 24, 2005 Author Share Posted August 24, 2005 I lost all my baby wieght almost right away, and because I breast fed, lost even more rapidly... I guess my problem was that I didn't breastfeed long enough. I was pretty lucky with the weight, and like you, most of it dropped off within the first two weeks. It's just that I was left with a good 15 pounds to linger on, and it took about 8 months to stagger off. But everyone told me I looked like I never even had a baby. So I guess the real trick is in breastfeeding! I think I'm worried over nothing. I guess I should start worrying if I get gestational diabetes and gain 60 pounds. That would be a challenge. Link to post Share on other sites
Merin Posted August 24, 2005 Share Posted August 24, 2005 Originally posted by Jolene I guess my problem was that I didn't breastfeed long enough. I was pretty lucky with the weight, and like you, most of it dropped off within the first two weeks. It's just that I was left with a good 15 pounds to linger on, and it took about 8 months to stagger off. But everyone told me I looked like I never even had a baby. So I guess the real trick is in breastfeeding! I think I'm worried over nothing. I guess I should start worrying if I get gestational diabetes and gain 60 pounds. That would be a challenge. LOL Well for me genetics played a big role... but yeah I breastfed both my babies for a year each... this shrinks down the uterus faster and burns calories like mad... all of my baby wieght was gone within 2 weeks... but again i'm sure genetics had a lot to do with that... It's odd for me now sometimes... LOL both of my girls have long blonde hair while mine is darker although they both look like me in thier face I will have people look like this >>> when they find out these 2 little people are mine because of how small I am.... Don't worry though Jolene... I guess the thing to keep in mind always is this... you're bringing a new life into the world and with that sometimes comes change... but as long as you love YOURSELF and take good care of YOU then IMO everything else falls into line... Link to post Share on other sites
TheDiva Posted August 24, 2005 Share Posted August 24, 2005 I am fortunate enough to be married to a man that didn't really care. I gained 80 pounds with my first child, but there was medical problem there. I also dropped it inside the first 6 weeks without even trying. With #2 and #3 I gained about 20 pounds. I had problems with breastfeeding and had to cut it shorter than I wanted all 3 times. But it does help to burn those calories and drop the weight faster. I do believe a lot of men do have problems with it, but won't really say it. I mean, who wants to be a moving target for a hormonal woman? I don't think it really matters to men as much as it does to women though, because pregnancy can make you very insecure about your body at times. We women tend to accentuate the negatives when we don't feel very good about ourselves. So of course, if we feel like a beached whale, we think that is the way he sees us. Here's a BIG trick is I learned by accident. If you want to eat alot, Get a lot and only eat 1/4- to 1/2 of it and give the rest to to daddy Make him gain twice the weight and he can't complain about yours. My husband gained twice as much as I did the last two times. With our first he gained about 20 pounds, he also lost it with me each time. Ain't that SWEET! Link to post Share on other sites
Teag Posted August 24, 2005 Share Posted August 24, 2005 I gained 70lbs w/ my pregnancy and only lost about 15lbs of it. It took me 2 years to lose 50lbs but that was only b/c of a very stricked diet but since I got off my diet Ive gained 35 of it back. Like Merin mentions, genetics play a factor in it, my mom & grandmother are both about 40-50lbs over weight. We have thyroid problems which helps us to keep weight on & gain it back fast. I have been lucky enough that my H doesn't care or so he says, he just doesn't want it to get to a point where my health is at risk. I think it bothers me more than it bothers my H. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted August 24, 2005 Share Posted August 24, 2005 After preganancy and childbirth, how did you (to the guys) or how did your husband (to the gals) handle the fact that the mother's body is not the same and may never be again.I married Mrs. Moose because of who she is and not what she is. She could gain 300 lbs, I would still love every inch of her. I went in to this with that mind set, and I'll never change it. I don't ever see that happening though, She's 5'7" @ 105lbs now at 39 years old and after 5 children......she's still my little hottie....... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Jolene Posted August 24, 2005 Author Share Posted August 24, 2005 I married Mrs. Moose because of who she is and not what she is. She could gain 300 lbs, I would still love every inch of her. I went in to this with that mind set, and I'll never change it. That's the kind of marriage we don't hear about often enough! I've heard more than one story of ...well, she got fat!!! Meanwhile, the guy is nothing to get excited about. Marriage should not be based on superficial motives and it sounds like you live happily together. Kudos to you! Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted August 24, 2005 Share Posted August 24, 2005 I had twins. When I got out of the hospital I was exactly the same weight as when i got pregnant. Why? Because my sugar level was higher than normal and I had to be on a strict diet. So I wasn't allowed to eat as much as I wanted to. There is only one way to maintain your weight and keep the baby healthy - to eat only healthy food and only in the necessary quantities. The baby doesn't need a lot of food, it actually benefits from a low-fat-low-carb nutrition program. Link to post Share on other sites
Blackfrost Posted August 25, 2005 Share Posted August 25, 2005 My wife got big too, during the carrying of our daughter - did I care after our daughter was born? No. I was waaayy too tired and frazzled in the first year of getting used to our new family addition, that by the time I looked over and saw my wife again - and wasn't so tired, that my libido had recovered - she had already lost the weight - and we were all over each other again Link to post Share on other sites
Cecelius Posted August 25, 2005 Share Posted August 25, 2005 I honestly did not care for 5-6 years of the 75-100 lbs. extra that my then wife had put on during the first pregnancy and reaquired during a second. It did irritate me when she was not working any longer and still 3-4 years passed with no progress. Honestly, I dunno how shallow I am but I know my preferences and from now on (1) I actively discourage having children and (2) if I did, I'd carefully check out the mother in law to see where nature's course will be. Link to post Share on other sites
Outcast Posted August 25, 2005 Share Posted August 25, 2005 So, Cecelius, do your prospective ladies check out your dad to see if your hair will last and your gut grow? Link to post Share on other sites
she_9325 Posted August 25, 2005 Share Posted August 25, 2005 HAHAHA outcast, that's awesome. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted August 25, 2005 Share Posted August 25, 2005 (2) if I did, I'd carefully check out the mother in law to see where nature's course will be.This doesn't always ring true. My MIL is like 5' tall and 200+ pounds...... Link to post Share on other sites
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted August 25, 2005 Share Posted August 25, 2005 Originally posted by Outcast So, Cecelius, do your prospective ladies check out your dad to see if your hair will last and your gut grow? Actually you check out their grandfather or their mother's brother! Link to post Share on other sites
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted August 25, 2005 Share Posted August 25, 2005 Originally posted by Moose I married Mrs. Moose because of who she is and not what she is. She could gain 300 lbs, I would still love every inch of her. I went in to this with that mind set, and I'll never change it. I don't ever see that happening though, She's 5'7" @ 105lbs now at 39 years old and after 5 children......she's still my little hottie....... That's nice. Thinking wayyyy back, and I know that's not the topic of this thread however, if she were the same person, would you have given her a second look if she was 150 lbs? 5'7 and 105 sounds borderline anorexic to me by the way. Link to post Share on other sites
Outcast Posted August 25, 2005 Share Posted August 25, 2005 5'7 and 105 sounds borderline anorexic to me by the way. It sure does. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted August 25, 2005 Share Posted August 25, 2005 That's nice. Thinking wayyyy back, and I know that's not the topic of this thread however, if she were the same person, would you have given her a second look if she was 150 lbs?You bet I would. I fell in love with her heart and personality. I could tell she had a gentle spirit when I first laid eyes on her. Like I said, it's just a major bonus that she happens to be a hottie.... Link to post Share on other sites
MWC_LifeBeginsAt40 Posted August 25, 2005 Share Posted August 25, 2005 super skinny = hottie? hmmmm sorry. Maybe I'm a little jealous because I haven't been 105 lbs since I was 13 and I'm barely 5'2. but I'm not fat. Yes there is some fat on my body, but I'm still considered by some/many to be a hottie. I have curves, something to hold onto. I could take her! Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted August 25, 2005 Share Posted August 25, 2005 Well, I was just corrected, Mrs. Moose is actually 5'4" at 105 lbs. That would make better sense. She doesn't appear to be starved. She looks just fine to me. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted August 26, 2005 Share Posted August 26, 2005 Originally posted by Star Gazer That's still really thin. She must not have any T or A?? I'm 5'4'' and 128 pounds...but a size 4 in pants or 2 in a skirt (all muscle, with some cushion in the T and A )She's proportioned just fine. She's just very petite. There's plenty upstairs, and downstairs is just fine as well.And I think the reason why you SAY you'd love her at 300 pounds is because you know she'll never get there... You can think all you want. Doesn't mean you know anything. I know it's getting harder for the present world to accept that someone like me would love my wife unconditionally. I really can't blame anybody, it's what society has been able to program into people. People more and more put conditions an anything and everything. I'm sticking to the old school ways and keeping it simple. I married Mrs. Moose for life, no matter what may come. That's an attitude that's losing it's popularity.......someone has to keep it alive. Link to post Share on other sites
she_9325 Posted August 26, 2005 Share Posted August 26, 2005 "...it's what society has been able to program into people. " thank you, someone else that feels this way about society. it's very true. "People more and more put conditions an anything and everything. I'm sticking to the old school ways and keeping it simple. I married Mrs. Moose for life, no matter what may come. " um, like... you rock. i wish more people could take a lesson from your attitude. Link to post Share on other sites
Cecelius Posted August 30, 2005 Share Posted August 30, 2005 So, Cecelius, do your prospective ladies check out your dad to see if your hair will last and your gut grow? Heck no -- my dad's way better looking than me and has mad skills with the ladies... Link to post Share on other sites
TheFaithfulWife Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 I was one of those unfortunate few who gained a ton of weight during all my pregnancies and never was able to take it back off. I have a metabolic disorder and am lacking growth hormone and the enzymes needed to lose weight. I stay at the same weight and it doesn't budge no matter how much I exercise or diet. Of course everyone assumes that I am hiding stacks of Oreos in my purse and gobbling them down every chance I get lol. I have been placed on diets that have only 500-600 calories a day(doctor supervised) only to finally have them discover this disorder I have. Problem is that the cure may be worse then the disorder.. If I take the medications necessary to remedy my growth hormone disorder, I have been told the side affects can be excessive hair growth ( on my chin not my head) and a deepening of the voice( Oh goody I can sound like Maude!) I am currently exploring a herbal remedy that my doctor has suggested. Hope it works! And if my husband and I ever do separate I want Moose to know that I'm available!!!! Just kidding, but I want Moose to know that he is my idol. Whatta man ! As for my being fat... My personality seems to outweigh my stomach as I am never at a loss for a date or flirtation. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted August 31, 2005 Share Posted August 31, 2005 And if my husband and I ever do separate I want Moose to know that I'm available!!!! Just kidding, but I want Moose to know that he is my idol. Whatta man ! Wow! Thanks Faithful....... Link to post Share on other sites
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