Mysterio Posted January 21, 2018 Share Posted January 21, 2018 In the serach for love and compananionship. I wonder if our expectations are real? All I really want is a woman in her late 30's that is childless and wants us to connect romantically. We are on the same page most of the time. I am what she wants and vice versa for the most part. I want the warm/sweet/affectionate type. Flexable and we enjoy the same social activities. Like Music/Movies/Resturants for talking about the world around us. We both dress up and are well groomed/fit for each other. So what about you. When it happens. Do you have a ideal type. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 21, 2018 Share Posted January 21, 2018 In another thread I mentioned I'm flexible but mental illness is out. I think that's something that can be reality. As example, the lady across the way who always was greeting me when I was out working was a prospect before her kid shot her car and she later ran over his foot after chatting with me at her car. Something just doesn't seem right there. Then two shiny sheriff's vehicles showed up one day and it's been quiet ever since. However, I will apply some lenience because the lady in question relocated from Southern California. TBH, when I was watching all that go down I started getting flashbacks to the UCC shooting and the family dynamics behind it. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mysterio Posted January 21, 2018 Author Share Posted January 21, 2018 One has to be careful now a days. What I don't get with me is that when I make a friend. Its of high quality. When I pursue a romantic prospect. There is always an obsticle in the way. Be the woman is married and I find out, or something else. With me. No woman is going to find an obstcle towards me. Unless they want to get with me and want kids right away. I don't want kids off the hop to borderline no kids at all, but then again. If we gel. I could make it happen. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 21, 2018 Share Posted January 21, 2018 Don't get me wrong....when younger I had all the typical mating lists that are often posted on LS. At this time of life, lists, just thinking about them, nah, too much energy expended on something I've little interest in so, rather, go with the flow. If it don't flow, let it go. Like I did in the example. When reality presents itself, accept it. Link to post Share on other sites
CptInsano Posted January 21, 2018 Share Posted January 21, 2018 Don't get me wrong....when younger I had all the typical mating lists that are often posted on LS. At this time of life, lists, just thinking about them, nah, too much energy expended on something I've little interest in so, rather, go with the flow. If it don't flow, let it go. Like I did in the example. When reality presents itself, accept it. Agreed, I had relationships with women where I wasn't all that impressed when I first met them. But if somebody makes you happy, really happy, don't over-analyze and question it. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted January 21, 2018 Share Posted January 21, 2018 I don't really have an ideal typeanymore. No ideal personality, look, or age or anything. I don't care if they are an introvert or extrovert or any of that. I have been on dates with guys that are so different but I find them too equally attractive in different ways to have an ideal type I used to have an ideal type when I was stuck on my ex. Even before him, before I had a relationship I would have a ideal in my head of a 'perfect' man but I think that was just because I never dated and was stuck in my fantasies. I 2 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 21, 2018 Share Posted January 21, 2018 In another thread I mentioned I'm flexible but mental illness is out. I think that's something that can be reality. As example, the lady across the way who always was greeting me when I was out working was a prospect before her kid shot her car and she later ran over his foot after chatting with me at her car. Something just doesn't seem right there. Then two shiny sheriff's vehicles showed up one day and it's been quiet ever since. However, I will apply some lenience because the lady in question relocated from Southern California. TBH, when I was watching all that go down I started getting flashbacks to the UCC shooting and the family dynamics behind it. You dodged that bullet. I'm laughing so hard. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted January 21, 2018 Share Posted January 21, 2018 I always had a type. But my type was more about music subculture. Pretty much someone had to be involved in that because it was my main thing. Then the question is, is your ideal person really out there? Not for everyone. If they are, you may never meet them. I have a guy I held up on a pedestal since I was very young. He is close to my ideal (not a musician but a really good artist/designer, so still in the creative spectrum). He was ideal to look at too. I loved how he did obvious romantic gestures (hand kissing mainly). (P.S. every guy I met after that said never to trust a handkisser and called him things that rhyme with banker.) But I liked it. Also liked dancing with him. Loved how he dressed (first time I saw him on the hippie street in my hometown, he had a leather flag jacket one -- but usually he wore black on black.) I loved how adventurous he was. 25 years later, we had a couple of dates long distance. It was then I realized he was somewhat like me in that neither of us were going to be good at domesticity, as in coupled up and cooperating and doing daily chores together. We even talked about it. He was an explorer. I wasn't that so much, but I understood why he'd give everything up for it if necessary. He also had trouble with getting real close and intimate. It scared him. He kept some things inside. He ran if he thought you cared too much. So was he my ideal man? Not quite, because I'd have liked it if he could stay put at least long enough to have the ultimate romantic affair. But neither am I my ideal self, so there you go. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
gaius Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 I was a little skeptical when I started talking to Timshel that she was actually who she said she was, simply because it was like my absolute ideal woman walked out of my dreams and into reality. But there she was on our first meeting, strolling through the door exactly as she said looking so scorchingly sexy. I still get an instant woodie anytime the memory pops into my head. And the conversation was just as sizzling. Still is. I don't think you're ever going to meet every expectation though Mysterio. I never though I'd be living in the city I'm in but I actually enjoy it now. I know she wasn't expecting to be with someone who has to wake up so early for work but it happens and you compromise and deal with it. The key to any good relationship. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 You dodged that bullet. I'm laughing so hard. Literally, since I heard the bullet impact the vehicle and the report at the same time due to proximity. I'm used to gunfire since we shoot target at our places but it's usually away, like shooting into the mountain aka safe gun handling. Topically, when I see young guys on the forum going through their lists and attempting to formulate an equation for mating success I'll often suggest to them to think less and feel more. Listen to their instincts and go with the flow. Women aren't a math problem and past performance is no guarantee of future success. Humans are constantly changing and IMO that's healthy. I hope she likes rain 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Timshel Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 What? Now this is a perfect example of compromise for the better, ie..ideal,lol. I am an early riser, since I have had children my body clock remains early to bed/early to rise. No problem. If the alarm clock goes off decibel fire at 5:00 am and the person rolls over and goes back to sleep for two hours....well. To the OP, I would say relax. If you hit it off with a person and things flow along, you'll know if you should hang around or move along. No person is perfect to the point that they won't irritate you once in awhile. The key is to be with someone you love and respect and someone who loves and respects you. If you have this, all else will sift itself out. Love the rain. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 Yeah it is very real, although compromising somewhat is not wrong. For me it has to do with energy/demeanor way more than looks or anything else tangible. A certain melancholic at time, hyperactive at time vibe, as weird as it sounds turns me on like nothing else on earth. Fun fact: I have a cluster of crushes that have been born within the same week (last week of July). Now when someone tells me that he's born within July 24-31, I'm conditioned to get a crush on him 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 I can't stand Leos!!! xD. It's an Aquarius thing. Love/hate! May I ask what you are ? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 I can't stand Leos!!! xD. It's an Aquarius thing. Love/hate! May I ask what you are ? Scorpio. Does it make sense? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 A lot of sense! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 A lot of sense! Just curious are Scorpios & Leos somehow matching better than others? Esp. late July Leos and late October Scorpios? Thinking more on my 'type' ... I just need a drama-driven but yet composed guy if I can put it that way...Someone who is highly energetic and in the same time can buffer a bit my chaos, which is frankly abysmal... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 I'd be lying if I sat here and pretended I knew anything about astrology. But I do know 2 leo/scorpio couplings and their relationships were intense. Crazy intense...a little bit too much so for their own good. On the topic of types though, I think one thing I really like is a cynic with good grammar/punctuation skills. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 The only expectation I've had of a partner is that they be a good person who takes care of themselves. Everything else was negotiable. I think it's why I always had reasonable success in dating. I know so many people who've broken so many dating rules (myself included) but ended up with a great relationship. They wouldn't have what they do if the were sticklers for doing things properly. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
HiCrunchy Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 Yeah. I dated him so I know he exists, looks wise at least. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
RecentChange Posted January 22, 2018 Share Posted January 22, 2018 I have never fantasized about an "ideal type". I am really not one for day dreaming, or spending a lot of time contemplating "what ifs". I don't really spend much time "stuck in my head" if that makes any sense. Instead I try to be HERE and now, and present. I could say I have an "ideal build" but then remember fantastic partners that were nothing like that. Think of an "ideal personality" but in reality I get a long with a large variety and may be surprised by who I really click with. I could have an "ideal style" - but that has really changed as I have met different people throughout my life. While I don't have an "ideal" I know pretty quickly who I am, and am not attracted to. And just as important, who I would be compatible with. Its the individual that matters, not what categories they may fit in. Link to post Share on other sites
nospam99 Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 Now when someone tells me that he's born within July 24-31, I'm conditioned to get a crush on him No_Go, I must introduce you to my brother and my twin sons to set off your conditioning . 3 Link to post Share on other sites
shoplocal Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 Just curious are Scorpios & Leos somehow matching better than others? Esp. late July Leos and late October Scorpios? Thinking more on my 'type' ... I just need a drama-driven but yet composed guy if I can put it that way...Someone who is highly energetic and in the same time can buffer a bit my chaos, which is frankly abysmal... Maybe Scorpio women and Leo men? I'm a Leo woman and cannot stand Scorpio men. They're so obsessed with secrets and hiding/protecting themselves they don't communicate clearly. Blech. I used to actively hate Scorpio ladies when I was a kid, but now I know some are okay, after careful vetting and strong boundaries. Anyway. My type definitely doesn't exist. Calm, practical, open minded men with stellar conversation skills can have any woman they want. Unfortunately, they don't want fat, eccentric, black women. On the flip side, I appear to be the ideal type for low income immigrants looking for easy casual sex with a woman they'd never in a million years call their girlfriend because black women are not partner material. I always wonder if this approach works on anyone, but have never been brave enough to ask. I'm afraid they'll say that it does indeed. (And for those asking why I'm bringing race into it: these men tell me they approach me because I'm black, and also consider me not relationship material because I'm black.) 2 Link to post Share on other sites
todreaminblue Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 I have an ideal type ....a guy with old school values preferrably with the same faith as me.........someone who can inspire and motivate me to be the best person i can be.....and i him...the only thing is ....me looking for an ideal type they may not look at me.... ..i am an ex hooker with five kids born out of wedlock.....which i would be honest about from the very beginning....making me ...not their ideal......classed as not marriage material.....i want a guy who wants forever with me.....and it would be a cool change for a guy to understand that people can change their hearts.....that circumstances are not living people.....but situations peoples have lived... as far as my ideal goes...ill live in hope.....and i will keep growing with faith...because what i want in a guy is a heartfelt desire true and right to want and need in a man...that one day...my ideal will stumble over me or me over him and give me a chance...i believe...that if your desires are true and right to have......they will happen..my ideal man...is true....and exists...and yep cant wait..actually i have been and can wait...lol.....i have waited too long to stop.....waiting.......deb..... 1 Link to post Share on other sites
healing light Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 I like men who are highly intelligent, kind, and have a sense of humor. One that can laugh at jokes even if he's not funny. For some reason, nearly all of the men I've liked have been born in late January to February. The last decade the men I've been most attracted to had blondish/brownish hair and blue eyes. I think because if you like one person really intensely that happened to have a certain look, then you notice it more in other people around you after that. I don't actually care about whether a guy has those physical traits and the opposite (dark hair, dark eyes, etc.) was my type growing up. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Cookiesandough Posted January 23, 2018 Share Posted January 23, 2018 shoplocal, yea I suppose that may make a difference. These were all Leo man/scorpio woman.Yeah. I dated him so I know he exists, looks wise at least. Im curious if your ideal type looks like that Youtuber guy you post a lot 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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