Is my husband jealous or upset ?

[lovelywife]

Don.t know what to do?

 

 

May be jealousy from my husband side or something else ?

We are married from last 3 years my husband is 28 years old and I am 26 years old.

 

 

I am extrovert and have friends from both gender female and male, whereas my husband is introvert and have friends from male section only.

I have a few childhood and college friends who are my best friends, we all best friends are married.

 

 

I am friendly to my best friend husbands also, so we play games, visit some places, and participate also, whereas my husband is different from my best friend husbands,

 

 

there are certain instances where I have touched, groped or cuddle with my best friend husbands, and my best friends are fine with their spouse that they also do with each other irrespective of the gender,

 

 

There was a party and unfortunately my ex bf was also there so we danced together in a sensual way, whereas my husband was not very much interested in dancing, he was looking and talking to other people who were present at that party, so my friends in excitement complemented both of us, how we look great together and really enjoy together, they forgot about my husband presence,

 

 

My husband on that day came to know before our marriage, I was in a relationship with my ex bf.

But he did not ask or said anything after wards,

 

Similar kind of instances happened, once daring task in a fun activity was given to me so I performed a kind of twerking activity on my male colleagues in an outside office party which was non-official, my husband was not there,

 

 

There are several incidents like these happened.

 

 

Recently a month ago during some fun games, my best friend husband touched my body and kissed on my navel and my husband saw that, he did not say anything after that nor reacted.

 

 

But after that day he is very distant to me, I asked him what’s wrong or did I said anything or is there any issue or problem, he did not say anything.

 

 

Just two weeks ago my husband went to Los Angeles for business and project work, since that day he is giving me the silent treatment. I texted him I missed him and sent some romantic and erotic messages, on which he has not responded.

 

Is my husband upset over these things or is he a kind of jealous?

 

I don’t know what’s the issue,

 

 

Update : Where as my husband lost his virginity to me, after our marriage ceremony, he never asked about my previous or past relation, so I did not tell him about my ex bf and my relationship.

 

 

Similarly, there were other instances also where my office colleagues were flirting with me and I responded to them in a flirtatious manner and my husband was observing these things.

 

And let me tell you about my husband, he is very kind, honest, decent and pure man, and twice he has donated blood to my father in some emergency situations, my husband does household work, prepare breakfast, do other household chores also, he treats my friends and colleagues with respect and good way but my best friends also indicated my husband is not like their husband, he is not funny and charming like their husband, but my husband in terms of intelligence, designation and earning, he earns a very high package and better than my best friend husbands

 

And off course he is very handsome in terms of looks and heights, only thing is he is shy and introvert.

[PegNosePete]

I have touched, groped or cuddle with my best friend husbands...

my ex bf was also there so we danced together in a sensual way...

I performed a kind of twerking activity on my male colleagues...

my best friend husband touched my body and kissed on my navel

Let me tell you, if you did just ONE of those things then you would be my EX WIFE.

 

Of course he is upset and angry and jealous. You are acting like a single teenager, not a married woman.

 

If you want to save your marriage then you need to start apologising and begging and change your ways in the future.

 

Whereas if you want to maintain your party girl lifestyle then you need to either be single or find a new husband, who is into those things as well, or who doesn't mind his wife acting like a single teenager.

 

I don't think you can keep both your lifestyle and your husband. Time to choose.

[DKT3]

Don.t know what to do?

 

 

May be jealousy from my husband side or something else ?

We are married from last 3 years my husband is 28 years old and I am 26 years old.

 

 

I am extrovert and have friends from both gender female and male, whereas my husband is introvert and have friends from male section only.

I have a few childhood and college friends who are my best friends, we all best friends are married.

 

 

I am friendly to my best friend husbands also, so we play games, visit some places, and participate also, whereas my husband is different from my best friend husbands,

 

 

there are certain instances where I have touched, groped or cuddle with my best friend husbands, and my best friends are fine with their spouse that they also do with each other irrespective of the gender,

 

 

There was a party and unfortunately my ex bf was also there so we danced together in a sensual way, whereas my husband was not very much interested in dancing, he was looking and talking to other people who were present at that party, so my friends in excitement complemented both of us, how we look great together and really enjoy together, they forgot about my husband presence,

 

 

My husband on that day came to know before our marriage, I was in a relationship with my ex bf.

But he did not ask or said anything after wards,

 

Similar kind of instances happened, once daring task in a fun activity was given to me so I performed a kind of twerking activity on my male colleagues in an outside office party which was non-official, my husband was not there,

 

 

There are several incidents like these happened.

 

 

Recently a month ago during some fun games, my best friend husband touched my body and kissed on my navel and my husband saw that, he did not say anything after that nor reacted.

 

 

But after that day he is very distant to me, I asked him what’s wrong or did I said anything or is there any issue or problem, he did not say anything.

 

 

Just two weeks ago my husband went to Los Angeles for business and project work, since that day he is giving me the silent treatment. I texted him I missed him and sent some romantic and erotic messages, on which he has not responded.

 

Is my husband upset over these things or is he a kind of jealous?

 

I don’t know what’s the issue,

 

 

Update : Where as my husband lost his virginity to me, after our marriage ceremony, he never asked about my previous or past relation, so I did not tell him about my ex bf and my relationship.

 

 

Similarly, there were other instances also where my office colleagues were flirting with me and I responded to them in a flirtatious manner and my husband was observing these things.

 

And let me tell you about my husband, he is very kind, honest, decent and pure man, and twice he has donated blood to my father in some emergency situations, my husband does household work, prepare breakfast, do other household chores also, he treats my friends and colleagues with respect and good way but my best friends also indicated my husband is not like their husband, he is not funny and charming like their husband, but my husband in terms of intelligence, designation and earning, he earns a very high package and better than my best friend husbands

 

And off course he is very handsome in terms of looks and heights, only thing is he is shy and introvert.

 

Hmm, you sure you're ready to be married? These are some pretty disrespectful unwife like behavior. Keep it up and he will be your ex husband... sounds like that would be smart on his behalf.

Edited January 22, 2018 by DKT3

[d0nnivain]

I too am an extrovert married to an introvert. I have several male friends & enjoy interacting with my GF's husband's & SOs but there is nothing overtly sexual about those interactions. A quick, not full body hug hello is fine. Cuddling & groping is crossing a line. Playing board or card games is fine. My husband does not like to dance. I have a male friend who I have known for 30 years. He's single (well has a GF but she never comes out). We often all end up at parties together. He likes to dance so I will often dance with him but it looks like something out of a Catholic junior high -- there is enough space between our bodies to fit a Bible.

 

You on the other hand are behaving shamelessly, teasing these other men & flaunting your sexuality in your husband's face. Some other man should not be kissing your navel! He shouldn't even see your navel. That is not the behavior of an extrovert. That is the behavior of a disrespectful woman who is emasculating her husband. Your behavior is a reflection of him & right now it's simple disgraceful. If you care about him or your marriage, tone it down. Apologize & from now on limit your flirting to him alone. If you can't do this, your husband will leave you.

[sdraw108]

I don’t know what’s the issue

 

Really?

 

Imagine the situation were reversed and your husband was groping, cuddling, being sensual, and twerking with an assortment of other females including his ex girlfriend. What would your reaction be?

 

I don't know what's worse - your behaviour, or the fact that you seriously need us to explain to you what the problem is.

[skywriter]

Is my husband jealous or upset?

 

 

He's upset and rightfully so. If the shoe was on your foot and your husband was groping his female friend, you'd be upset too.

[harrybrown]

you need to read "not just friends".

 

you have lousy boundaries.

 

hope you get some quick. If you can't stop, give him a nice D.

[ExpatInItaly]

You got married before you were ready to settle down, OP.

[road]

Another example that people in relationships do not need

thus should not have opposite sex friends.

 

You know your behavior with these other men is wrong.

 

You know that you should be having NC with past lovers

yet you dance with them in front of your husband.

 

You posted these acts and your husbands response after

each act you saw his displeasure.

 

So I have to ask why did you still keep behaving in a disrespectful

manner to your husband?

 

Were you looking for us to say the problem your husband's

reaction, and not your behavior?

[RecentChange]

Wow.... try to put yourself in his shoes. Would you really be okay with him philandering with females?

 

I a very outgoing, very social, extrovert with a number of male friends. I would also consider most of my husband's friends my friends. We all get together socially very often, and I hang out with his married and single guy friends.

 

But I have BOUNDARIES - you are displaying none.

 

there are certain instances where I have touched, groped or cuddle with my best friend husbands, and my best friends are fine with their spouse that they also do with each other irrespective of the gender,

 

In most social circles this would not be cool. Groped?! Cuddled?

 

In my world guy friends get a friendly hug as a greeting for farewell.. shoulder touches or a pat on the back. No cuddling or groping! If its not something you would do in front of your grandparents, its inappropriate to do as a married person.

 

 

There was a party and unfortunately my ex bf was also there so we danced together in a sensual way,

 

Noooooo no no no... you are MARRIED!

 

 

, so my friends in excitement complemented both of us, how we look great together and really enjoy together, they forgot about my husband presence,

 

Nice, rubbed some salt in the wound. OUCH.

 

 

 

Recently a month ago during some fun games, my best friend husband touched my body and kissed on my navel

 

Are these some married couples hanging out, or an episode of Girls Gone Wild Cancun? Just not okay. So insulting and disrespectful to your husband.

 

 

Update : Where as my husband lost his virginity to me, after our marriage ceremony, he never asked about my previous or past relation, so I did not tell him about my ex bf and my relationship.

 

Thats a pretty big detail to omit when marrying someone - so he had to wait till after the marriage to have sex with you - but you didn't tell him you weren't a virgin?

 

 

Similarly, there were other instances also where my office colleagues were flirting with me and I responded to them in a flirtatious manner and my husband was observing these things.

 

Ugh... honey, this ALL comes down to respect. Respecting your husband, respecting your marriage, respecting YOURSELF.

 

As a woman, as a business professional - stuff like this last paragraph make me queasy.

 

DON'T FLIRT AT WORK! Do you wanted to be respected for your mind, and your capabilities, or to be valued for your sexuality? Please don't play into that.

 

Besides you are married.... no flirting at work. Or with your girlfriend's husbands, or your husband's friends. Just NO.

 

And you may think I am some sort of prude - but really I am not. My husband and I actually play around with flirting etc. But we do it after we have COMMUNICATED our desires, the complexity behind these sorts of things, where the hard boundaries are, how either can veto at any time. How it only happens when we are together and with explicit permission - because again, its about respect, and placing each other first.

 

Now why has he shut down? Most husbands would be FURIOUS at your behavior, and it sounds like he does not have communication skills. So, he has gone quiet.

[Darren Steez]

What does being an extrovert have to do with knowingly disrespecting your spouse?

[GoldenR]

Here's what I got from your post...

 

You spend your social time trying to find every way possible to disrespect, emasculate and embarrass your H. And then when he finally has had enough, you wonder what's up.

 

I mean, you danced sensually with an ex RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIM!!! Seriously, what's wrong with you? You don't act like a wife. If you so desperately want to get physical with other men, divorce your H first and give him the chance to find real love.

[Interstellar]

 

And let me tell you about my husband, he is very kind, honest, decent and pure man, and twice he has donated blood to my father in some emergency situations, my husband does household work, prepare breakfast, do other household chores also, he treats my friends and colleagues with respect and good way but my best friends also indicated my husband is not like their husband, he is not funny and charming like their husband, but my husband in terms of intelligence, designation and earning, he earns a very high package and better than my best friend husbands

 

And off course he is very handsome in terms of looks and heights, only thing is he is shy and introvert.

 

You don’t deserve him.

 

You really need to take your husband’s feelings in consideration. There are a lot of great advice in this thread. Don’t just come here to bellyache and complain then go back to doing what you’re doing.

 

First, cut ALL contact with the ex, social media, texting, etc..everything.

Edited January 25, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
unnecessary imagery ~T

[todreaminblue]

its not appropriate for you to grope cuddle or hang off friends husbands....not only for your own relationship but for the respect and appreciation of the relationship status of your friends....honor and cherish your husband he sounds wonderful.....the characteristics and traits you have stated your husband has make him a rare breed of man....if people you know state otherwise....they are the ones who are jealous.......

 

it would be a shame to drive a wedge when you could have real happiness on tap from an attentive kind thoughtful intelligent man ...nurture that....all the wonderful .....thank god for it........yep your guy....thank god he is who he is......you should return all he does ...in attention love and support for him

 

dont listen to others when they say he is wanting in other areas..interrupt them to stand up for the guy who really cares for you......say yeah you think but you dont see this......and list all the wonderful to them....

 

 

so what he isnt funny...i bet he has his own style ....get to know him better...he sounds like he is pretty deep so swim.....a comic alone doesnt make a husband...you be the comic...make his heart light and treasure that heart...stop with the other men who arent yours...groping cuddling....cuddle your own guy and be happy you have him to cuddle......i wish you well...deb

[usa1ah]

Don.t know what to do?

 

 

May be jealousy from my husband side or something else ?

We are married from last 3 years my husband is 28 years old and I am 26 years old.

 

 

I am extrovert and have friends from both gender female and male, whereas my husband is introvert and have friends from male section only.

I have a few childhood and college friends who are my best friends, we all best friends are married.

 

 

I am friendly to my best friend husbands also, so we play games, visit some places, and participate also, whereas my husband is different from my best friend husbands,

 

 

there are certain instances where I have touched, groped or cuddle with my best friend husbands, and my best friends are fine with their spouse that they also do with each other irrespective of the gender,

 

 

There was a party and unfortunately my ex bf was also there so we danced together in a sensual way, whereas my husband was not very much interested in dancing, he was looking and talking to other people who were present at that party, so my friends in excitement complemented both of us, how we look great together and really enjoy together, they forgot about my husband presence,

 

 

My husband on that day came to know before our marriage, I was in a relationship with my ex bf.

But he did not ask or said anything after wards,

 

Similar kind of instances happened, once daring task in a fun activity was given to me so I performed a kind of twerking activity on my male colleagues in an outside office party which was non-official, my husband was not there,

 

 

There are several incidents like these happened.

 

 

Recently a month ago during some fun games, my best friend husband touched my body and kissed on my navel and my husband saw that, he did not say anything after that nor reacted.

 

 

But after that day he is very distant to me, I asked him what’s wrong or did I said anything or is there any issue or problem, he did not say anything.

 

 

Just two weeks ago my husband went to Los Angeles for business and project work, since that day he is giving me the silent treatment. I texted him I missed him and sent some romantic and erotic messages, on which he has not responded.

 

Is my husband upset over these things or is he a kind of jealous?

 

I don’t know what’s the issue,

 

 

Update : Where as my husband lost his virginity to me, after our marriage ceremony, he never asked about my previous or past relation, so I did not tell him about my ex bf and my relationship.

 

 

Similarly, there were other instances also where my office colleagues were flirting with me and I responded to them in a flirtatious manner and my husband was observing these things.

 

And let me tell you about my husband, he is very kind, honest, decent and pure man, and twice he has donated blood to my father in some emergency situations, my husband does household work, prepare breakfast, do other household chores also, he treats my friends and colleagues with respect and good way but my best friends also indicated my husband is not like their husband, he is not funny and charming like their husband, but my husband in terms of intelligence, designation and earning, he earns a very high package and better than my best friend husbands

 

And off course he is very handsome in terms of looks and heights, only thing is he is shy and introvert.

 

You did all these things as a wife?

 

If my wife had done half of what you have, I would have divorce her. What you have done is break your marriage vows, you know the honor and respect ones.

[usa1ah]

The reason you can’t get ahold of him, he might be filling for divorce.

[S2B]

Do you see what's wrong at this point?

 

Are you open to getting counseling to learn what a healthy boundary looks like? To learn what respect in a relationship looks like - with your husband and your friends and their husbands?

 

Your behavior is toxic to your marriage and detrimental to your friends marriages.

 

If you want to act this way and not change you shouldn't be married.

 

You know what you've been doing - it's not right that you're trying to blame any of this on your husband being a decent man. Stop taking advantage of him being kind. He will get sick of you embarrassing him.

[lovelywife]

Thanks for the reply and advice,

 

 

Appreciated by everyone,

 

 

Please don’t be harsh on me, I do love my husband.

 

 

Update: last night after office, I had a skype call with my husband, we talked,

we had a conversation, I asked him why he is distant, giving silent treatment and not

responding to my love messages, I told him, I love him and miss him, he some how was hesitant to respond on those questions,

 

 

there is an excerpt of the conversation

 

 

my husband reply: I want you to be happy,

my response, I want mine, your and our happiness with you, not without you.

My response: do you love me, are you happy with me or us?

My husband did not reply

My response: I love you and I might have done or said something which is why you are silent.

My husband did not reply,

My response: I love you, you make me happy, you are the most wonderful man in my eyes and I consider myself as lucky.

My husband reply: are you sure, are you telling the truth?

My response: why do you think like that? why would I lie to you?

My husband did not reply

My response: look I did not said about my past relationship and my exbf, and my virginity. Because you never asked me, and I thought it might hurt you or upset you, as you were virgin and you never had a girlfriend, and I thought might be you had some different thinking and I know you are pure and honest, you told me everything about you, then I thought its better to tell you after marriage, but I know I was wrong. And I can’t undo what I did before our marriage,

My husband reply: do you trust me or have faith in me, do you trust in our relationship, are you happy with us, if its yes, then there should be transparency and no secrets whether it’s about their past or present.

My response: I had some friends with benefits relationship before my ex bf and few one-night stands, then ex bf was there and after that I met you and married you, let me tell you are the most amazing man I have met and most exciting and pleasurable sexual intercourse with you, although you were virgin, and till the time I am with you, there won’t be any other man or person in my life.

My husband reply: don’t know what to say on that, by the way sexual intercourse is concerned credit goes to you that you taught me lot of things and you enjoy that.

Do I fulfil your emotional, physical, financial needs and other form of requirements?

 

My response: you meet my emotional, physical need and financial needs and other requirement and there won’t be better man than you in my life.

 

My husband reply: i believe action is more effective than words, look if you are unhappy you don’t have to lie and your happiness matters, may be not with me, may be with someone else.

My response: I don’t know why are you not trusting me, why are you telling me such things, look I want to have a talk face to face not over the phone or skype, I am booking my tickets for this Friday night I am visiting your place.

My husband reply: I will come to the airport to pick you.

 

 

My reply: good night, love you,

Then sent some kisses over the skype call and showed my body.

 

 

My husband response: good night, you don’t have to do such things over the skype,

 

 

That was the discussion.

 

 

By the way I have booked tickets ,eagerly waiting to hold my husband in my arms.

 

 

How would I approach for further talks with my husband?

Any suggestions or advice ?

Edited January 25, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[BluesPower]

Girl, you are simply clueless. If I was your husband I would have already filed for divorce.

 

You hide the fact that you have had several sexual partners before him, enough that you could actually train him, he is not stupid he knows how you learned so much.

 

And still you wonder why he is upset.

 

You are going to lose him, and if it matters to you, you need to change every thing that you are doing in public.

 

What do you do when you get home??? Don't act like a fool in public, lose all of the guy friends, and do everything that you can do to show him he is the most important thing in the world.

 

But, I don't think you can do that, so you may want to just let him off the hook...

Edited January 25, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[kgcolonel]

Either he is afraid or too inexperienced to tell you how insecure your behavior has made him. Frankly it would make any husband either insecure or simply say "I'm out" unless they were into swinging...okay maybe too extreme but your behavior is not one of a wife who is sensitive to her husband's needs. Or, the second is that you're on your own train and just happy as long as your able to tease and tempt others...no matter how it makes your husband feel.

 

JMO.....as to what you should do....ask him what HE needs from you to make him feel safe in the relationship....be quiet and listen carefully....encourage him to have a voice in the relationship....

[BaileyB]

You have very poor boundaries...

 

If you plan to keep your marriage, you need to develop better boundaries and show more respect to your husband.

[todreaminblue]

i suggest a mediator...a professional marriage counsellor....i can see why you are confused and i understand your husbands lack of response.....theres a communication breakdown and you are so right to not continue it over skype or phone.....that's a positive thing....

 

you doubt your husband because he cant give you the words and your husbands doubts your words because of your actions with other men....if you really want to fix this....get a counsellor involved quickly....who can bridge that communication gap and eb there to support both of you in a positive resolution....in the form of strategies and homework....deb

[usa1ah]

Thanks for the reply and advice,

 

 

Appreciated by everyone,

 

 

Please don’t be harsh on me, I do love my husband.

 

 

Update: last night after office, I had a skype call with my husband, we talked,

we had a conversation, I asked him why he is distant, giving silent treatment and not

responding to my love messages, I told him, I love him and miss him, he some how was hesitant to respond on those questions,

 

 

there is an excerpt of the conversation

 

 

my husband reply: I want you to be happy,

my response, I want mine, your and our happiness with you, not without you.

My response: do you love me, are you happy with me or us?

My husband did not reply

My response: I love you and I might have done or said something which is why you are silent.

My husband did not reply,

My response: I love you, you make me happy, you are the most wonderful man in my eyes and I consider myself as lucky.

My husband reply: are you sure, are you telling the truth?

My response: why do you think like that? why would I lie to you?

My husband did not reply

My response: look I did not said about my past relationship and my exbf, and my virginity. Because you never asked me, and I thought it might hurt you or upset you, as you were virgin and you never had a girlfriend, and I thought might be you had some different thinking and I know you are pure and honest, you told me everything about you, then I thought its better to tell you after marriage, but I know I was wrong. And I can’t undo what I did before our marriage,

My husband reply: do you trust me or have faith in me, do you trust in our relationship, are you happy with us, if its yes, then there should be transparency and no secrets whether it’s about their past or present.

My response: I had some friends with benefits relationship before my ex bf and few one-night stands, then ex bf was there and after that I met you and married you, let me tell you are the most amazing man I have met and most exciting and pleasurable sexual intercourse with you, although you were virgin, and till the time I am with you, there won’t be any other man or person in my life.

My husband reply: don’t know what to say on that, by the way sexual intercourse is concerned credit goes to you that you taught me lot of things and you enjoy that.

Do I fulfil your emotional, physical, financial needs and other form of requirements?

 

My response: you meet my emotional, physical need and financial needs and other requirement and there won’t be better man than you in my life.

 

My husband reply: i believe action is more effective than words, look if you are unhappy you don’t have to lie and your happiness matters, may be not with me, may be with someone else.

My response: I don’t know why are you not trusting me, why are you telling me such things, look I want to have a talk face to face not over the phone or skype, I am booking my tickets for this Friday night I am visiting your place.

My husband reply: I will come to the airport to pick you.

 

 

My reply: good night, love you,

Then sent some kisses over the skype call and showed my body.

 

 

My husband response: good night, you don’t have to do such things over the skype,

 

 

That was the discussion.

 

 

By the way I have booked tickets for Los Angeles ,eagerly waiting to hold my husband in my arms.

 

 

How would I approach for further talks with my husband?

Any suggestions or advice ?

 

You are not hearing what you husband said. Talk is cheap, anyone that is cheating on there SO can say exactly what you just said to your husband.

 

All of your actions show the opposite of what you sad above to your husband.

 

You actions say he is not and will never be enough.

 

Your words are cheap while your actions speak volumes.

 

I know how you can start to fix this but you need to figure it out on your own. If you can’t then you really are not ready to be married. If you do best of luck repairing the damage you have caused.

[usa1ah]

You have basically been cheating on your husband.

 

Would you be ok if he was doing everything you did with another woman you don’t know? Touching her groping her

 

Are you from india?

[RecentChange]

Here's the thing.....

 

Your husband responds in silence because he can't believe you do not know what is wrong. His silence should have brought forth apologies from you, because you have done many things that need apologize for. On your knees begging, apologizing every day unprompted kind of thing.

 

And he asks you if you are happy, if you want to be with him.

 

Do you know why that is?

 

Because your behavior makes it appear that he is not enough for you, and that you are seeking more. Your behavior makes it appear that you do not value your marriage, therefore must be unhappy with it.

 

It's your actions. All this flirting, all this inappropriate behavior is telling him that he is not man enough, and you don't give a $h!t about this marriage.

 

As they say, actions speak louder than words.

 

And then we have the betrayal about your sexual history.

 

This is bigger than you may think. First of course there is the fact be that you know.... Perhaps he valued a fellow virgin, rather than a girl who had one night stands and casual sex.

 

Because not only can this make him feel insecure etc, but also shows that you two have fundamentally different views with your approach to sex. He is cut from the wait until marriage cloth, and you....you are cut from the casual sex cloth. Very different approaches.

 

And in your daily life, it sounds like he conducts himself in a more conservative way, in line with his views about sex. And you? Well.... Sounds like you like to party like a Girls Gone Wild special.

 

And you didn't let him know that, before he vowed to be with you forever.

 

Now here he is, dumbfounded to discover you are not prude wife, but a very sexualized woman.

 

Showing your body on Skype was icing on the cake. He wants you to turn down the sexual stuff. Stop trying to use sex for attention, or problem solving. He is trying to talk to you about some very deep and important things (which sounds difficult for him), and you just don't get it - and show him your body instead.

 

When you go to visit. Don't try to manipulate him with sex. Talk to him. LISTEN TO HIM.