CantTakeMySmile Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 I have noticed that in almost every story here there are references to social media, and who has blocked who, or blocking and unblocking, or WhatsApp "connections " I sometimes go months without being on social media, and really have no idea what WhatsApp even is. So, with that being said, it seems like there is a lot of "meaning" behind what an ex may or may not do concerning their social media accounts. Does it mean if you are not blocked you still have a chance with your ex? Does it mean if they block you they have moved on ( I would assume that it does) I am just not sure because so many posts mention this like it is something pretty relevant to their breakup. I understand not looking at an ex social media so you don't see hurtful pictures, and I can see blocking if there is harassment. Also, could someone kinda explain what WhatsApp is? Is it just a messenger like texting? If so, why not just text. Maybe I am showing my age here ( I am in my 40s), but I just haven't really had the draw of social media, but I am curious what it means in regards to relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 No it means that the "kids" don't understand why it's unhealthy for them to see every thing that their EX posts. If you are broken up there is no need to stay connected. People who care about this stuff attach importance to virtual reality which is what social media is: meaningless drivel. 5 Link to post Share on other sites
GorillaTheater Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 So I guess you guys don't want to be my FB friends? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author CantTakeMySmile Posted January 31, 2018 Author Share Posted January 31, 2018 (edited) It seems so important to the broken hearted if someone has blocked them. And you are right, it seems to “mean” something as to whether there is a chance to reconciliation. I have never blocked or even removed photos because at one point, that person was important to me. But, as far as looking at their social media, I don’t see how that could ever be helpful with recovery. If someone blocked me, I wouldn’t WANT to have anything else to do with them. It just seems almost every post puts a huge emphasis on this. Edited January 31, 2018 by CantTakeMySmile Canttakemysmile Link to post Share on other sites
Young mind Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 Apparently in this day and age social media is an integral part of relationship more so break ups, it's a way to subjectively show the world you moved on from your past relationship and you are still desired and wanted by others. Blocking, although I consider it immature after long term relationship is only a defense mechanism from the dumpee to stand his/her ground to the decision Link to post Share on other sites
Author CantTakeMySmile Posted January 31, 2018 Author Share Posted January 31, 2018 Blocking, although I consider it immature after long term relationship is only a defense mechanism from the dumpee to stand his/her ground to the decision For the dumpee, I guess it is self preservation. But, it seems like one would just not look. I am referring to all the talk from the dumpee as “on what day/time the ex blocked me or WhatsApp me or what not”. It seems a large portion of the threads really focus on this and I was wondering what the posters thought it meant in terms of their break up. Like is there hope if not blocked?! I don’t know. It is strange to me to place so much emphasis on that. How long before someone texts Back also seems to be a big deal too? Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 No it means that the "kids" don't understand why it's unhealthy for them to see every thing that their EX posts. If you are broken up there is no need to stay connected. People who care about this stuff attach importance to virtual reality which is what social media is: meaningless drivel. True, but it's also a component of life now that isn't going away, and even though we might not "get it," it's still a valid issue for many. Can you imagine the parents of teenagers at the turn of the 20th century? "Why don't you just go and knock on her door and ASK her how she is instead of stewing over why she didn't pick up that talk machine? Maybe it isn't working or she was outside hanging the laundry on the line!" Each generation probably has things they've considered nonsense . Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 Like is there hope if not blocked?! Yes, probably. Kinda like when we were in high school and caught someone looking at you at the same time you were looking at them......"is there a chance...?" Link to post Share on other sites
Author CantTakeMySmile Posted January 31, 2018 Author Share Posted January 31, 2018 I get the high school analogy. Lol. But many are grown folks! Haha! Maybe I am blocked and don’t even know it! Lol. How do you know if you don’t look? Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted January 31, 2018 Share Posted January 31, 2018 I don't understand why people think blocking is immature. If I break up with somebody that man is no longer in my life. That means I don't talk to him. We're no longer in contact IRL so why does he get to or need to see the jokes I post, my vacation pictures, where I ate dinner, what party I went to, how my family spent the holidays? I certainly don't want to know all that stuff about him anymore so . . .unfriend / unfollow & that is that. I unfollow people all the time especially if their social media is filled with ranting & raving. We're still friends & I can see them if I like but their stuff doesn't pop up in my feed because I don't care to have them in my face. Today after the SOTU I'm loathe to even turn mine on. Is blocking a step too far? If seeing his name or face is gonna make me cry, especially if we have a lot of common friends, hell yes I'm gonna block him. I really don't understand why self preservation is such a bad thing? 5 Link to post Share on other sites
Author CantTakeMySmile Posted January 31, 2018 Author Share Posted January 31, 2018 I don't understand why people think blocking is immature. If I break up with somebody that man is no longer in my life. That means I don't talk to him. We're no longer in contact IRL so why does he get to or need to see the jokes I post, my vacation pictures, where I ate dinner, what party I went to, how my family spent the holidays? I certainly don't want to know all that stuff about him anymore so . . .unfriend / unfollow & that is that. I unfollow people all the time especially if their social media is filled with ranting & raving. We're still friends & I can see them if I like but their stuff doesn't pop up in my feed because I don't care to have them in my face. Today after the SOTU I'm loathe to even turn mine on. Is blocking a step too far? If seeing his name or face is gonna make me cry, especially if we have a lot of common friends, hell yes I'm gonna block him. I really don't understand why self preservation is such a bad thing? I don’t think it is immature, right or wrong. I just was wondering why such emphasis is put on it. I get it. It seems like some people block as soon as there is a breakup. That’s great if it makes you feel better. It just seems strange when people comment “well, they haven’t blocked me on {insert social media}, so maybe they want to get back together. Seems like with most breakups, there is SO MUCH to analyze that this seems unnecessary and somewhat irrelevant. But that is just me... which is why I asked.. to gain different perception. And that maybe there was a real meaning behind it. Like I said, I don’t use much so I like to hear people’s reasoning. I understand taking a break from it. I took a year or so off after the election. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
clam Posted February 1, 2018 Share Posted February 1, 2018 (edited) I think that blocking and unblocking is used as a “weapon” of sorts. Often used as a way to hurt or get back at someone. “She blocked me. Then an hour later she unblocked me for 10 minutes. Then blocked me AGAIN! What does this MEAN??!!” Who the heck knows what it means? And why waste time and energy clock-watching the ever changing statuses? I have no issue with blocking someone if you’re moving on, but there seems to be a lot of petty game playing by some when it comes to social media. Edited February 1, 2018 by clam 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Arieswoman Posted February 1, 2018 Share Posted February 1, 2018 donn0vain #2 People who care about this stuff attach importance to virtual reality which is what social media is: meaningless drivel. I could not agree more ^^^ According to the news in UK this morning social media is losing its popularity - maybe people are starting to get a reality check? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Gaeta Posted February 1, 2018 Share Posted February 1, 2018 Do not be on social media and you'll have a better life. It's not only good for us oldies, it's good for the young as well. My niece of 22 got tired of the circus and has been off all social media for 2 years now, her relationship, her life, are doing much better since. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author CantTakeMySmile Posted February 1, 2018 Author Share Posted February 1, 2018 donn0vain #2 I could not agree more ^^^ According to the news in UK this morning social media is losing its popularity - maybe people are starting to get a reality check? I heard this as well. I never paid a lot of attention to it, even though my friends seem to be on it a lot. I mean, like multiple times a day... then I have seen so many comments here about the "MEANING" of certain things. I always thought "in a relationship" meant just that... lol.. seems it has way more meaning than that!! What is snapchat and WhatsApp? My friends don't have that I don't think. Is it more geared towards younger folks? Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted February 1, 2018 Share Posted February 1, 2018 What is snapchat and WhatsApp? My friends don't have that I don't think. Is it more geared towards younger folks? Yes. I don't have either, but I believe it's mostly the younger people that are using it. I don't really get why my daughter uses a texting app rather than just texting, but I assume maybe her friends don't have phones maybe and can only use an app when they have WiFi. I use regular old texting for everyone and don't have time for Snapchat nonsense! Link to post Share on other sites
Buriall Posted February 1, 2018 Share Posted February 1, 2018 I'm so freaking glad I'm not on any social media anymore.. I don't give two shiets about who blocked me or unfolllowed me blah blah...why worry about these things which is not the reality..I ll always choose the less stress free way...I'm now more self centered and happy without these things in my life..I'd suggest anyone to give it a try 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Rockdad Posted February 1, 2018 Share Posted February 1, 2018 After reading someone's post in LS about some social media blow up they had I thought to myself, I wonder if we have a happy marriage because neither of us pay to much attention to social media? My younger sister lives and breaths by texting and FB. She told me to contact her on it or text if I need to talk to her. I told her I don't use it very often and I hate texting for I know how to actually talk. Of course that put her off (sisters, nuff said ) I haven't heard from her in months. Link to post Share on other sites
Chilli Posted February 1, 2018 Share Posted February 1, 2018 No it means that the "kids" don't understand why it's unhealthy for them to see every thing that their EX posts. If you are broken up there is no need to stay connected. People who care about this stuff attach importance to virtual reality which is what social media is: meaningless drivel. Yeppaaa , about sums it up Isn't it just amazing and mind boggling , and sad to really , the way they do things now. Link to post Share on other sites
IndigoNight Posted February 2, 2018 Share Posted February 2, 2018 I used to use social media often for work, and friendships. I have since streamlined work, and the only people on my FB are family, and I don't use Twitter, Instagram, etc. I got tired of the drama, and people using the block function instead of dealing with their problems. It reminded of high school, and pettiness. I will pass. I still talk to my friends in person, or on the phone. I rarely use FB except to stay in touch with more distant family members. The older I get, the more simplified I want my life to be. Link to post Share on other sites
Author CantTakeMySmile Posted February 2, 2018 Author Share Posted February 2, 2018 While I get it, to some extent, to see photos of family and friends. I don't care the people that have 1000s of "friends" , unless it is for business. But that is their thing, not mine. It just seems, from reading here, that it adds a whole new dynamic for the broken hearted. I know I have enough to analyze, that adding three or four social media platforms and what they may/may not mean, would be a bit overwhelming. SO many people day, "well, I can only reach them through their phone number because they have blocked me everywhere else". Hmmm.. well, then use the phone if that is what it takes. LOL. I have never communicated with a partner via social media. I guess I feel like what I say to my partner is to them only, not everyone else. Old school I guess. Link to post Share on other sites
Logo Posted February 2, 2018 Share Posted February 2, 2018 I really don't see the need for a couple in a relationship to follow each other on social media. I mean, they have each other's phone numbers, they -- most likely -- see each other on a regular basis to maintain the relationship. They can text each other whatever they want, so I don't understand the need to attach one's self through a proverbial umbilical cord to another person. I'm not judging or criticizing. But it's not for me. Link to post Share on other sites
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