CrazyKatLady Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 So, I was thinking... If there are a billion + people on the planet and everybody is unique, why in the heck are we all following the same set of dating rules? I'm just going to stick to liking people the way I like them, because that is how I show MY OWN interest. I don't think that that is very hard to understand or interpret, and it is honest to who I am and how I love. It may set me up for failure at the end or in the beginning, but I am me...why should I change the way I do things...shouldn't we all be loved for who we are...yeah, I'm not adopting into a segment of beliefs that aren't me at all. But, it is good to know how many hundreds of thousands of people conform to a sub standard in life. Granted, you have a few people out there who probably need to follow a guideline...that's cool. A real possibility. But, I am going to stick to dating and liking and loving the way I do it. In that way, it is real to who I am and the other person can appreciate or hate me for who I am and not because I followed a guideline that isn't me at all. That would be bad. Isn't that the same thing as dishonesty? IDK. I am going to give human beings the benefit of the doubt and say that most people that like someone wouldn't step on the other persons toes anyways, as long as they too, were being themselves and living in honesty...I have faith in others. Is there things I can change, if I like another person and it is within reason and makes them happy? Sure. That's compromise and it makes the world go round. But, it takes two to tango, so it would have to be copasetic. Can't we all just get along and still be an individual in the dating world? I don't want to place a lot of value on rules...I just want to like someone the way I like to. It's been great learning about what is the "norm" in dating...but I don't think I will get to caught up in it and beat myself up for not knowing these things in the past, or trying to compensate for them in the future...it's just not what I feel like doing at all when I like or love someone. Why do we all conform to some scientific, mass-agenda when it comes to dating? Because it makes sense and it has a formula that can be replicated and is successful? I am a scientist in training at college, but I don't think I want to apply the scientific method to my love life...that is not the all-truth to my life...that is just a way that man can explain something in his own understanding that packs the world around him into something that makes sense to him...this world is amazing, people are amazing...I don't need it to always make sense. I like a little mystery and wonder in my world and in my men. Does anyone else get tired of following dating rules about when to call, when not to call, when to message instead of calling, when to cease all contact, when to move on, when to say that another person has gone overboard in a relationship or is just completely off their rocker, when to ask for marriage, when not to, when to move in together, when to stop cheating, when to start leaving, when to start a new relationship, etc.? How is their a sub standard to all of this? How is the population really coping with these ideals? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author CrazyKatLady Posted February 10, 2018 Author Share Posted February 10, 2018 I meant there instead of their in that last sentence...grammar, uuhhh! LOL. Link to post Share on other sites
gone_girl Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 I don't think that's true. There are different dating customs in different places of the world. But I do sense what you mean. Customs are annoying! People usually decide they like you on their own and there's not much you can do to influence that. It doesn't matter if you are shy or daring, serious or funny, girly or a tomboy. The ones who wanna like you will like you. Did anything happen in specific? Link to post Share on other sites
Chilli Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 (edited) Ha. l've been sayin that since l came to this place. All these people following all these internet lists , it's crazy surreal. Can't believe it. That would mean everyone had to be exactly the same and just make a whole lotta sheeple. That aren't even being themselves. Don't get any of it. Edited February 10, 2018 by Chilli 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Versacehottie Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 So, I was thinking... If there are a billion + people on the planet and everybody is unique, why in the heck are we all following the same set of dating rules? CrazyKatLady, maybe you are not so Crazy?!?! A general gist but of course there is no one set formula! People are so multi-layered and different from each other it's just too complicated to ALL follow a set pattern. You DO just need to be yourself and take each situation and person individually. Some general patterns will apply and then there will be nuances specific to you, your situation and your guy. Goodluck Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 Some people follow a list because they lack basic instincts due to the lack of life experience. Remember we are dealing with a world that relies on texting, and with that leaves many who don't have proper social skills that would enable them to handle dating/meeting people/socializing. That's why there is so much failure reported on these boards. In the old days you dressed up and went out to meet people, you interacted, socialized face to face. You went out to find the party, hung out, or went trolling/cruising lookin for where the action was. It was a lot of fun. Now everyone sits a home swiping through profiles of mostly hook ups/predators/catfishing/fudged photos/bs and all that. Pretty sad. BTW world pop is over 7.6 billion. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 I think the rules exist to save people from themselves. It's OK to break the rules too, but it certainly comes with higher risk of getting hurt. If a person is not risk averse and knows that they can bounce back if things go wrong, then there's nothing wrong with ignoring the rules 1 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted February 10, 2018 Share Posted February 10, 2018 You need to take risks if you want change, or things to change. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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