Relationship with a Scientist or Physicist?

[bathtub-row]

Just curious if anyone here has had any experiences dating or marrying a scientist or physicist. Just curious as to what your experience was/is. I'm somewhat intrigued with guys like this.

[Logo]

Are you thinking you're going to be turned off by the pocket protectors or whether he's going to be wild in bed, a bore or a fascinating person to talk to. What if he ends up cloning your future kids. Then what?

 

I sometimes wonder what it's like dating a dentist or an architect.

 

Have you ever dated a hotdog ballpark vendor, or an elevator installer? If so, what was that like? Did it have it's ups and downs?

[Penguin_hugs]

I can actually give a bit of an insight in to my experience I guess.

 

My ex boyfriend was a physicist. When I met him he was doing and PhD and by the end of the relationship he was a post doctorate researcher.

 

I'm a pharmacist- so the science aspect worked well for our relationship- but obviously I didn't understand his research. I think we had a lot of conversations about lasers and him coding!

 

In the end he broke up with me so he could focus more on his research without any form of distraction... I guess that sums it up. In reflection (although it took me a long time to see the flaws in what we had because I was truly devastated with the break up) I realised that he would have always put work/ research first. He cancelled my birthday plans for it once, cut short a holiday to get back to work etc. And I guess I just never had his full attention. He was an intelligent guy though- but had a few social issues. He had a crippling shyness around new people but that seemed to be a common thing with all his friends and colleagues.

 

New boyfriend is a secondary school (age 11-18) physics teacher. I've had to put up with a lot of jokes about having a type! But I would say being a teacher has made him a more well rounded person. We can still have the science debates- but he has more interests and less social awkwardness. He's still introverted- and it does sound like his fellow physicist friends are similar. I don't know whether there is a trend between being introverted and having social awkwardness and being in the physics field? I know that my ex told me that everyone on his degree course was the same and my current boyfriend would agree.

[CptInsano]

Most physicists, at least historically, have moved on to other professions after they graduated. Personally, I have done everything from finance to marketing. Chances are that you will not be able to easily tell the person with the physics background apart from somebody working in many other professions. I don't think that most people primarily think of a physicist when looking at Angela Merkel.

[bathtub-row]

I can actually give a bit of an insight in to my experience I guess.

 

My ex boyfriend was a physicist. When I met him he was doing and PhD and by the end of the relationship he was a post doctorate researcher.

 

I'm a pharmacist- so the science aspect worked well for our relationship- but obviously I didn't understand his research. I think we had a lot of conversations about lasers and him coding!

 

In the end he broke up with me so he could focus more on his research without any form of distraction... I guess that sums it up. In reflection (although it took me a long time to see the flaws in what we had because I was truly devastated with the break up) I realised that he would have always put work/ research first. He cancelled my birthday plans for it once, cut short a holiday to get back to work etc. And I guess I just never had his full attention. He was an intelligent guy though- but had a few social issues. He had a crippling shyness around new people but that seemed to be a common thing with all his friends and colleagues.

 

New boyfriend is a secondary school (age 11-18) physics teacher. I've had to put up with a lot of jokes about having a type! But I would say being a teacher has made him a more well rounded person. We can still have the science debates- but he has more interests and less social awkwardness. He's still introverted- and it does sound like his fellow physicist friends are similar. I don't know whether there is a trend between being introverted and having social awkwardness and being in the physics field? I know that my ex told me that everyone on his degree course was the same and my current boyfriend would agree.

 

Lucky you! Interesting that so many are socially shy. I think they’re in their heads a lot so I guess it’s not surprising. Thanks for sharing. Very interesting.

[bathtub-row]

Most physicists, at least historically, have moved on to other professions after they graduated. Personally, I have done everything from finance to marketing. Chances are that you will not be able to easily tell the person with the physics background apart from somebody working in many other professions. I don't think that most people primarily think of a physicist when looking at Angela Merkel.

 

You’re a physicist? Very cool! Yes, I have heard that many change fields. Honestly, there’s probably not much you couldn’t do, though.

[todreaminblue]

I have been friends with professors... weirdly posthumous careers one i met in a psych ward he was a mathematical science professor... another couple of married professors off the grid in a hippy commune...all weren't happy in their chosen professions...and wanted out of society in general....we didnt speak much on their chosen professions....the married professors who were by the way, very happily married must have been to allow their wives to name their kids what they did.....they started and built the commune and then opened a volunteer country radio station which was where i met them....went to quite a few jazz dos in my early teens.....lots of red wine.....which i loathe i stuck to lemonade.....the jazz however was very cool .....

 

i found all the professors i have met to be open in every way unafraid of any topic.....and discussions easy.....they profs turned hippies were loving and publicly expressive to their wives.....and to their kids.....their kids were like sparks .....intelligent and they encourage and maintain thoughtful discussions didn't matter who you were....as far as sex goes .......i would assume by the way the wives looked at their husbands....they were blissful...maybe this isnt the norm i dont know.....all i know is that they were all brilliant.....intellectually superior ..... they built a whole community from scratch.....completely self sufficient..log by log.....

 

they took time to listen to my ideas..even when they were busy or reading.......they liked my poetry and they were great friends to me...they were trusting souls .........

 

sadly the maths professor i met in a psych ward lost everything......his family his home his job.......and became homeless.....i dont know where he is now....

 

i think being a professor can tax a brain ........that's why many genius professors i guess are often ...absent minded...

 

being a professor would need serious down time.....it takes over everything...especially the capacity to be close to another...their job becomes their lover ....maybe it isnt so weird the professors i have met ....all left their professions....and went off the grid...or became wanderers...maybe its just me who is weird for meeting professors who chose not to professor anymore.......deb.....

Edited March 6, 2018 by todreaminblue

[BluEyeL]

My ex husband was a Ph.D Chemist. Still is. Always put career before family and in the end left the family for career. It was fun at times because I’m a chemist too , bachelors and masters, with a Ph.D in Materials Science and it was fun discussing work. Work was the center of our interactions.

 

My current husband is a physicist with a masters. Totally different than the first husband. And he does practice his profession and makes money doing that. It’s possible with some of the fields. It’s good also because we understand each other’s work and can talk about it and it helps that we are both established and don’t put career before family. He is shy and not super social but so am I. Not interested in non stop social activities , prefer a smaller circle of friends and spending time mostly with family.

[Chilli]

That was one of my dads many careers too. He had an iq of around 180ish , so they say.

So he was a smart cookie but also a really fun and down to earth guy.

Women loved him , men loved him.

He was a barrel of laughs , loud , he'd stir anyone but he could sit down and speed read a book 2inches thick in one night while watching he's fav show.

These were books a average person couldn't even get through the first page.

 

When l was 12 -13 , he started buying farms , they're a great tax dodge here for wealthier people.

He'd drag us all up to them on the weekend and then he'd be a farmer for awhile. He'd work like a dog , drive tractors, put in fences, inseminate cows, you name it.

He also built 4 houses himself .

 

So yep , they do seem to branch of into other things, that one l can certainly vouch for haha.

[bathtub-row]

My ex husband was a Ph.D Chemist. Still is. Always put career before family and in the end left the family for career. It was fun at times because I’m a chemist too , bachelors and masters, with a Ph.D in Materials Science and it was fun discussing work. Work was the center of our interactions.

 

My current husband is a physicist with a masters. Totally different than the first husband. And he does practice his profession and makes money doing that. It’s possible with some of the fields. It’s good also because we understand each other’s work and can talk about it and it helps that we are both established and don’t put career before family. He is shy and not super social but so am I. Not interested in non stop social activities , prefer a smaller circle of friends and spending time mostly with family.

 

I’m not a physicist or in any related field but I was once married to a guy with a very high IQ. He enjoyed conversations with me, although his emotional intelligence was that of a 6-mo old. Still, I loved being with an intellect. As a writer, I tend to be less social and in my head a lot so I might be compatible with guys like this. I know I admire them a great deal. Brains are a total turn-on for me, even if I don’t understand half of what they’re talking about. Lol.

[CptInsano]

You’re a physicist? Very cool! Yes, I have heard that many change fields. Honestly, there’s probably not much you couldn’t do, though.

 

The career has been varied, indeed. I'm in my late 40s and just started with certain aspects of financial forecasting and capacity planning. I would say that I have been happiest in nuclear medicine.

 

But yes, many physicists are more or less generalists, quite in contrast to common perception.

[bathtub-row]

That was one of my dads many careers too. He had an iq of around 180ish , so they say.

So he was a smart cookie but also a really fun and down to earth guy.

Women loved him , men loved him.

He was a barrel of laughs , loud , he'd stir anyone but he could sit down and speed read a book 2inches thick in one night while watching he's fav show.

These were books a average person couldn't even get through the first page.

 

When l was 12 -13 , he started buying farms , they're a great tax dodge here for wealthier people.

He'd drag us all up to them on the weekend and then he'd be a farmer for awhile. He'd work like a dog , drive tractors, put in fences, inseminate cows, you name it.

He also built 4 houses himself .

 

So yep , they do seem to branch of into other things, that one l can certainly vouch for haha.

 

Oppenheimer was somewhat like that in the sense that he was amazingly diverse. Did you inherit your father’s high intelligence?

 

My username comes from a street in Los Alamos where Oppie lived while heading up the Manhattan Project. It was unofficially called Bathtub Row because the ones on that street were the few who had full bathtubs instead of showers. It was later officially given that name.

[bathtub-row]

The career has been varied, indeed. I'm in my late 40s and just started with certain aspects of financial forecasting and capacity planning. I would say that I have been happiest in nuclear medicine.

 

But yes, many physicists are more or less generalists, quite in contrast to common perception.

 

It takes quite a bit of brain power to acquire a physics degree, not to mention an innate curiosity about many things, and a mind for higher math. I’ve heard that Physics is the most complex subject on the planet and, having read a few books on it and not understanding a quarter of what I read, if have to agree.

[CptInsano]

It takes quite a bit of brain power to acquire a physics degree, not to mention an innate curiosity about many things, and a mind for higher math. I’ve heard that Physics is the most complex subject on the planet and, having read a few books on it and not understanding a quarter of what I read, if have to agree.

 

One benefit of working in multiple fields is that you learn to respect them. I used to work in a team of mostly Stanford MBAs. I will never be able to put a pitch together, or be able to control a room during presentations as they do. Other fields are a lot about experience and skill, something that is not easily earned, no matter how smart you are.

 

Yes, physicists generally aren't dumb. But many equally intelligent people focus on professions with a more refined career path and higher earning potential. You truly have to be somewhat of an idealist to study physics.

 

The core problem with understanding physics is that is expresses itself through math. Once I solved my first Hamiltonian I had tears in my eyes because I suddenly understood what my high school teachers tried to tell me, very inadequately through words. Unless you have a basic grasp of vector calculus physics won't make that much sense to you. That's not your limitation, but a fault of the way the information is conveyed.

 

Any high school teacher who is able to impress even a slight understanding of physics onto his students has my deepest respect.

[Popsicle]

I dated a physicist briefly. He was intriguing, the way his mind works, you know? He had all sorts of ideas which were super cool but ultimately he analyzed to much for me and that scared me.

[bathtub-row]

One benefit of working in multiple fields is that you learn to respect them. I used to work in a team of mostly Stanford MBAs. I will never be able to put a pitch together, or be able to control a room during presentations as they do. Other fields are a lot about experience and skill, something that is not easily earned, no matter how smart you are.

 

Yes, physicists generally aren't dumb. But many equally intelligent people focus on professions with a more refined career path and higher earning potential. You truly have to be somewhat of an idealist to study physics.

 

The core problem with understanding physics is that is expresses itself through math. Once I solved my first Hamiltonian I had tears in my eyes because I suddenly understood what my high school teachers tried to tell me, very inadequately through words. Unless you have a basic grasp of vector calculus physics won't make that much sense to you. That's not your limitation, but a fault of the way the information is conveyed.

 

Any high school teacher who is able to impress even a slight understanding of physics onto his students has my deepest respect.

 

Makes sense. I’m curious as to what kind of women you’re attracted to. Do they need to be able to relate to the things you know? Not hitting on you in any way — besides you’re probably about ten yrs younger than me. Just curious about what interests guys like you.

[thefooloftheyear]

Kinda funny...Most of my advanced math/physics/chem instructors in both HS and college couldn't figure out how to groom themselves, dress themselves, etc..

 

They showed up with old worn out shoes, coffee stained shirts, polyester pants, stunk of BO and had greasy comb-overs ..

 

Then I'd see them drive out of the facility in some clapped out old hooptie, all the while looking at us as a bunch of idiots that didn't know shyt about anything... A classmate of mine used to call them "esoteric a-holes"...

 

When I graduated and went to work in a lab, I found it wasn't much different there, either.. No way that life would ever be for me..

 

Went to lunch one day, and never went back...That was almost 30 years ago, my paycheck may still be there for all I know.....Never looked back...

 

I'm sure it's different in other venues, but just my experience...That was in the late 80's...A lot has changed, Ii'm sure.....

 

TFY

[Popsicle]

^^^ so true, lol :laugh:

 

The one I knew was a very successful businessman, had a really genius mind, and had so many interesting stories, but it's true, he wasn't the best at grooming and drove a hooptie. I didn't really understand that but I'm sure there are women who do.

 

At the time we went out, he wanted a child and I was still open to having them then. Last I heard he has a son now that he's happily raising on his own. He found a surrogate.

Edited March 6, 2018 by Popsicle

[BluEyeL]

The career has been varied, indeed. I'm in my late 40s and just started with certain aspects of financial forecasting and capacity planning. I would say that I have been happiest in nuclear medicine.

 

But yes, many physicists are more or less generalists, quite in contrast to common perception.

That’s what my husband does , he’s a medical physicist. It is a pretty lucrative job too not sure why someone will leave the field. I think it’s a great one.

[Popsicle]

That’s what my husband does , he’s a medical physicist. It is a pretty lucrative job too not sure why someone will leave the field. I think it’s a great one.

 

What do medical physicists do?

[BluEyeL]

What do medical physicists do?

Radiation treatments for cancer.

[Popsicle]

Radiation treatments for cancer.

 

I'm guessing you mean they research and study the treatments, rather than administer the treatments?

[CptInsano]

Makes sense. I’m curious as to what kind of women you’re attracted to. Do they need to be able to relate to the things you know? Not hitting on you in any way — besides you’re probably about ten yrs younger than me. Just curious about what interests guys like you.

 

No, I don't need somebody who relates to the things I do, as long as they consider my work meaningful. The chances of finding somebody with a similar background would be too slim anyhow. I used to date a microbiologist for a while, and it would have taken me years to truly understand what she did and how she did it, even though I had a rough idea.

 

No, most of the women I've been with had no science background whatsoever.

 

Radiation treatments for cancer.

 

Treatments are actually the smaller subcategory, at least as far as the overall field is concerned. Diagnostics are far more common, from cardiovascular scans to bone density measurements for race horses.

 

That’s what my husband does , he’s a medical physicist. It is a pretty lucrative job too not sure why someone will leave the field. I think it’s a great one.

 

The health care reforms over the last decades have shrunk the field quite considerably.

[CptInsano]

I'm guessing you mean they research and study the treatments, rather than administer the treatments?

 

Yes, and no. Think of it that nuclear medicine is half physics and half medicine. (Which makes it really interesting from a regular standpoint, as NRC and FDA regulations may contradict each other.)

 

The physicist supervises and handles a lot of the bureaucratic overhead that the production of radiopharmaceuticals entails. It's essentially a compounding pharmacy, and he/she will have to collaborate with a pharmacist.

 

Sure, there are also research facilities, but you'll also find physicist in the production and distribution of radiopharmaceuticals.

[nospam99]

Just wondering how much peeps think the same stereotypes apply to other 'geeks'. Computer scientist/software engineer (and dozens of other labels) here. In my one year at Cornell (years before most colleges even had degree programs in computer studies), the physics professor withheld my AP credits while he tried to talk me into changing majors. Wasn't going to happen because I couldn't afford the tuition in an endowed school. Cornell, being a land-grant college, has statutory as well as private colleges at the university. I was studying agricultural economics at the state College of Agriculture and Life Sciences at the time on the way to a Business degree.