How do I stop getting jealous of my girlfriend wearing sexy/revealing clothing?

[Hopeful30]

If you're not into women like that then why did you start dating her to begin with?

[FilterCoffee]

She’s not going to change how she dresses OP. And guys are not going to stop checking her out. Better accept it and be happy you’re dating a hottie.

 

And who could really blame her? At 22, she's ostensibly hitting that stretch of life where she won't be hard-pressed to find another guy. Maybe even one who doesn't sulk because she isn't wearing a potato sack to social events.

 

[basil67]

I hate to say it, but when she didn't have a reaction one way or another when you told her what was bothering you, it was probably because she was beginning to see you as her father, instead of a boyfriend. Be prepared for the brush off. Next time, get a girl who dresses more conservatively...

 

This^

 

Her lack of response was because she was processing a red flag.

[TunaCat]

That's a red flag in my opinion! Do you think I'm overreacting or I really should break up?

 

Why is it a red flag? It's HER body. She and only she gets to decide how to dress it. She doesn't need an excuse to put clothes she likes on her body.

[lakerman34]

So, I was at my girlfriend's sister's wedding. At the wedding, my girlfriend looked GORGEOUS.

 

Many guys gave her eyes, but a drunk man (in his 30s) hit on her RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME and RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIS WIFE!

 

He played it off like he was my friend, and moved on. 20 minutes later, I went to the bathroom, came out, and he was all up in her ear.

 

I almost approached him, but my girlfriend said, "DUDE, I'M NOT INTERESTED, BYE!"

 

If your girl is a keeper, she's doing something like that as well.

 

Also, FWIW, my girlfriend also knows that it's better she say something than I say something, because I wouldn't have been nice about it.

[SmartDude]

Hello my friends, I'm 32 and my girlfriend is 22, We're dating for a few months I do not mind her wearing some low cut tops, short shorts/skirts, even okay but last week we were at a party of her stepmother's family and she was wearing a low cut top that shows a lot of her boobs (she has huge boobs) and I was jealous. I did not like it very much and I was in bad mood the whole party. Why she has to show off with revealing clothes? Even in a family gathering? I told her later and she did not say anything, nor did I hear an excuse or anything. That's a red flag in my opinion! Do you think I'm overreacting or I really should break up? Because I don't want to date a very promiscuous girl that enjoy getting attention of other men!

 

 

Women are just like this haha. It does not matter if they are in a relationship. When they dress up pretty they are doing it to be sexually attractive to ALL MEN. That and its a social cue to other women as well.

[kendahke]

Hello my friends, I'm 32 and my girlfriend is 22, We're dating for a few months I do not mind her wearing some low cut tops, short shorts/skirts, even okay but last week we were at a party of her stepmother's family and she was wearing a low cut top that shows a lot of her boobs (she has huge boobs) and I was jealous. I did not like it very much and I was in bad mood the whole party. Why she has to show off with revealing clothes? Even in a family gathering? I told her later and she did not say anything, nor did I hear an excuse or anything. That's a red flag in my opinion! Do you think I'm overreacting or I really should break up? Because I don't want to date a very promiscuous girl that enjoy getting attention of other men!

 

Yes. You are so overreacting it's not even funny.

 

How can you be jealous of her? That sounds like something an insecure woman would say because she wasn't endowed like your girlfriend.

 

Yes. Break up. She needs a far more secure man--and someone more her age. That 10 years is making a difference.

[GemmaUK]

You're too insecure to date a gorgeous 22 year old.

She is 22 and will do as she wishes.

Please don't stick around and become controlling..end it and move on to someone more age appropriate who dresses like a +22 year old.

[DrReplyInRhymes]

Try dating a woman who never dresses up for you, doesn't even try with makeup for you.

 

 

I bet you'll really like this woman again!

[loverboy69]

Men and women like to look attractive to each other.

 

That is why you see a lot of women wearing clothing that accentuates features men like and why guys with ripped bods like to walk around and post pictures of themselves without a shirt.

 

Your GF might grow out of the way she dresses and she might not. If it's an issue for you and she won't change then you as an adult can make the decision that is best for you.

 

If you both have a sense of humor then you could try wearing something revealing one of these times.... just sayin'

[TheFinalWord]

Hello my friends, I'm 32 and my girlfriend is 22, We're dating for a few months I do not mind her wearing some low cut tops, short shorts/skirts, even okay but last week we were at a party of her stepmother's family and she was wearing a low cut top that shows a lot of her boobs (she has huge boobs) and I was jealous. I did not like it very much and I was in bad mood the whole party. Why she has to show off with revealing clothes? Even in a family gathering? I told her later and she did not say anything, nor did I hear an excuse or anything. That's a red flag in my opinion! Do you think I'm overreacting or I really should break up? Because I don't want to date a very promiscuous girl that enjoy getting attention of other men!

 

Bro, you have no game lol How did you snag this girl? You sound like a buzz kill.

 

Having dated 20 year old women, you absolutely cannot try to control them. Most likely, she will grow out of a lot of these attention seeking ways in a couple of years. In the mean time, I wouldn't care at all. I'd have fun with it TBH. Whispering things like "oh you like to tease me baby with those low cut dresses?"...stuff like that. Be playful and fun, why are you trying to coral her if all you want is her body anyway. Make her feel sexy, not like some jealous step-father.

Edited June 13, 2018 by TheFinalWord

[RideTheLightening]

Hello my friends, I'm 32 and my girlfriend is 22, We're dating for a few months I do not mind her wearing some low cut tops, short shorts/skirts, even okay but last week we were at a party of her stepmother's family and she was wearing a low cut top that shows a lot of her boobs (she has huge boobs) and I was jealous. I did not like it very much and I was in bad mood the whole party. Why she has to show off with revealing clothes? Even in a family gathering? I told her later and she did not say anything, nor did I hear an excuse or anything. That's a red flag in my opinion! Do you think I'm overreacting or I really should break up? Because I don't want to date a very promiscuous girl that enjoy getting attention of other men!

 

I went through something similar as a young man. Listen, the culture at large is trying to raise boys to be weak and compliant. You wind up suppressing all of your feelings and then exploding in passive aggressive behavior later.

 

If the situation occurs again, I suggest a different course of action. Girls who like to flaunt themselves are trying to get attention from OTHER MEN. This is a form of cheating and should not be tolerated. When you pick her up, if she is dressed inappropriately do not get mad or upset. Tell her that she is dressed inappropriately for a woman with a boyfriend and instruct her to either change or stay home. Honestly, you have to be willing to walk away from her. The vast majority of times she will be happy and respect you for this. Women who flaunt their bodies are disrespecting themselves on a deep level and they know it.

[DrReplyInRhymes]

So, I was at my girlfriend's sister's wedding. At the wedding, my girlfriend looked GORGEOUS.

 

Many guys gave her eyes, but a drunk man (in his 30s) hit on her RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME and RIGHT IN FRONT OF HIS WIFE!

 

He played it off like he was my friend, and moved on. 20 minutes later, I went to the bathroom, came out, and he was all up in her ear.

 

I almost approached him, but my girlfriend said, "DUDE, I'M NOT INTERESTED, BYE!"

 

If your girl is a keeper, she's doing something like that as well.

 

Also, FWIW, my girlfriend also knows that it's better she say something than I say something, because I wouldn't have been nice about it.

 

In theory, this is nice, and this is how it should be,

she can dress up for you but still handle it nicely,

It's when she doesn't handle the attention, or she doesn't turn them down,

That you have to be careful because now she's flaunting herself around.

 

Girls who like to flaunt themselves are trying to get attention from OTHER MEN. This is a form of cheating and should not be tolerated. When you pick her up, if she is dressed inappropriately do not get mad or upset. Tell her that she is dressed inappropriately for a woman with a boyfriend and instruct her to either change or stay home.

 

Unless she's completely naked, and in some cases, I still wouldn't care,

It's when she doesn't shut down the other guys who always seemingly stare,

Once you establish that trust that your woman is ONLY and ALL about you,

She can demonstrate this by dressing sexy, shutting them down, and it'd be fun too.

 

Maybe I'm different, but I have no problem seeing my woman dress up, taking her for a whirl,

One of my exes was fun like that, her previous boyfriend wouldn't let her be a girl,

I liked that she dressed up, she showed off her amazing body, she was sexy as ****,

But if any guy went too far, she let them know, she's mine, and I ain't a ****ing cuck.

[lostmyway82]

When she dresses like a $lut, you should take sometime to appreciate it, because if you don't others will.

 

Here is a tip for you, next time she dresses revealing clothes, pay more attention to her. Kiss her in front of everyone, flirt with her, fondle her a little if you have too especially in front of those guys eyeballing her. Let everyone know she is yours.

 

Then when nobody is looking drag her to the other room and punish her, because if you don't others will.

[js_77]

I'm learning something, she always use short shorts/skirts when we're together and I know other guys check at her legs because she has amazing legs but you know what, I don't care anymore.

Btw, I'm on therapy so I think this might help a little bit.

[lostmyway82]

Short skirt, low cut dress, high heels ... whats new ?

 

Your girl dresses for the occasion when she is with you, and yet you are acting like a complete tard.

 

Imagine if she dresses like that when she is not with you. That's when you should worry.

 

I get it, you are looking for a wife material, a girl who would act like a goody two shoes in public and a complete $lut in bed. Those days are gone dude, welcome to the 21st Century.

 

Wtf are you on therapy for? You think therapy is gonna help ? And what, you don't care anymore ? You just gonna give up just like that ? What a wuss..

 

The next time she wears a short skirt I dare you to put your hands up her skirt, especially when other guys are checking her out.

 

I wish I could swap my ex with your girl. You can have dressing revealingly when she is not with you, and I can have dressing revealingly when she is with me.

Edited July 31, 2018 by lostmyway82

[bachdude]

It doesn't matter the age, people ought to dress appropriately for the occasion. I think it's in bad taste to dress like you're going to the club when going to a family gathering. There, I said it.

 

Having said that, OP, it's not your place to control her. It's not good for her, for you, or the relationship. And it's not her fault you got jeleous. Own your own emotional reactions.

 

You should just tell her 'I feel uncomfortable with how sexy you are dressed for the family gathering. Are you trying to give me a woody in front of your family?'

[PRW]

Hello my friends, I'm 32 and my girlfriend is 22, We're dating for a few months I do not mind her wearing some low cut tops, short shorts/skirts, even okay but last week we were at a party of her stepmother's family and she was wearing a low cut top that shows a lot of her boobs (she has huge boobs) and I was jealous. I did not like it very much and I was in bad mood the whole party. Why she has to show off with revealing clothes? Even in a family gathering? I told her later and she did not say anything, nor did I hear an excuse or anything. That's a red flag in my opinion! Do you think I'm overreacting or I really should break up? Because I don't want to date a very promiscuous girl that enjoy getting attention of other men!

 

 

The only red flag I see here is you. Horribly insecure reaction on your part. Don't worry, she'll dump you soon enough. Girls with a great body (and 10 years younger than you) aren't going to tolerate jealous insecure attitudes from the guy they are with. What about you?...dating a chick 10 years younger that likes to show a some cleavage? What does that say about you. Maybe you should date someone your own age if you are so worried about "how things look" and "what others will think".

[js_77]

Ok it sounds like everybody here wants me to become a cuckold? No, thanks!

[Poutrew]

A man has to have honor if he is to live his life with integrity. Your woman needs to support you and strengthen you and compliment you, which isn't happening if she dresses in such a way as to arouse other men. When you confront her, she will give you every reason as to why she does it except for the real one - it is a power play. She is telling you that if she doesn't get her way, she can literally be in someone else's bed within 24 hours. Many desperate or inexperienced guys are not willing to give up on the sex so they let them get away with this behavior - they willingly take the first step towards being a cuckold by ceding their authority one step at a time, until the woman has no respect left and leaves for a more dominant man. An older, more worldly guy, will call her on it and make her stop disrespecting the relationship, or be willing to walk away from her for good. So, my advice is to call her on her behavior and don't take any B.S. answers or justifications. IF she doesn't ameliorate her behavior, dump her. Really, its crap like this as a main reason why mature individuals shouldn't date (mentally) children...

Edited August 1, 2018 by Poutrew

[PRW]

A man has to have honor if he is to live his life with integrity. Your woman needs to support you and strengthen you and compliment you, which isn't happening if she dresses in such a way as to arouse other men. When you confront her, she will give you every reason as to why she does it except for the real one - it is a power play. She is telling you that if she doesn't get her way, she can literally be in someone else's bed within 24 hours. Many desperate or inexperienced guys are not willing to give up on the sex so they let them get away with this behavior - they willingly take the first step towards being a cuckold by ceding their authority one step at a time, until the woman has no respect left and leaves for a more dominant man. An older, more worldly guy, will call her on it and make her stop disrespecting the relationship, or be willing to walk away from her for good. So, my advice is to call her on her behavior and don't take any B.S. answers or justifications. IF she doesn't ameliorate her behavior, dump her. Really, its crap like this as a main reason why mature individuals shouldn't date (mentally) children...

Believe it or not I don't disagree with this. It is a power play and she is in fact testing your resolve. But the question is how do you respond? Keep in mind that BOTH the secure guy that stands up for himself,...AND,...the whiny insecure guy that pouts about it are rejecting what she is doing. The key is to be the correct one of the two. To reject it in a way the shows you as the leader of the relationship rather than a whiny butt-hurt follower complaining that he isn't getting his way,...that is the real trick to pull off. I don't think I have a template for that one to follow, but that is what you have to keep in mind. One problem you may have is if you never had boundaries from the beginning, but then you suddenly want to have boundaries now, will make you look like a hypocrite with a holier-than-thou attitude.

 

And, yes, dating someone 10 years younger than you means there is 10 years difference in maturity that I imagine you never thought about back when all you saw were the nice boobs.

Edited August 1, 2018 by PRW

[Doost]

I’ve had lots of gfs who are young hotties who dress the part it’s what attracted me and I enjoy it. At the same time if I felt jealous and like a girl would cheat I would dump her. Later in this thread the OP said he no longer cares so enjoy

[js_77]

I don't care anymore because all girls her age these days dress like that, so why caring? She doesn't dress slutty but dress sexy.

[sandylee1]

I don't care anymore because all girls her age these days dress like that, so why caring? She doesn't dress slutty but dress sexy.

 

You come across as somewhat immature for 32 years of age.

 

You also come across as controlling. I've told my daughters the minute a boyfriend tries to tell them what to wear or criticises their clothing, they should walk away...because that's just the beginning.

 

You sulked like a preschool kid because you didn't like her low cut top and your 32.

 

If I was her I would have dumped you for that childishness.

[wilson1]

Hello my friends, I'm 32 and my girlfriend is 22, We're dating for a few months I do not mind her wearing some low cut tops, short shorts/skirts, even okay but last week we were at a party of her stepmother's family and she was wearing a low cut top that shows a lot of her boobs (she has huge boobs) and I was jealous. I did not like it very much and I was in bad mood the whole party. Why she has to show off with revealing clothes? Even in a family gathering? I told her later and she did not say anything, nor did I hear an excuse or anything. That's a red flag in my opinion! Do you think I'm overreacting or I really should break up? Because I don't want to date a very promiscuous girl that enjoy getting attention of other men!

 

This is funny, i am a guy about your same age. But i have a totally opposite approach on this. I personally like to show off my girlfriend. If i have a cute, hot girlfriend, she she dresses up elegant/cute/sexy for me and we go out together it turns me on. It's like i am showing off what a hot woman i have by my side and i actually enjoy it.

Maybe you should change your perspective?

 

As long as her behavior shows that she is yours and only yours, you should have nothing to worry about in the way she dresses.

 

If you have a Ferrari, would you try to cover it up and make it look ugly just that other men don't look at your Ferrari? Or would you show it off?