How to make new friends?

[Belle23]

So, it’s been awhile since I’ve gone out and tried to meet people and makes new friends. I have no problem meeting new people, but all my interactions usually end in, “well, it was great meeting you!” How do I go about meeting these people again? Do I ask their number? Is it weird to ask another female for their number? To give you background, I’m 30. I met most of my friends in high school, college, or at work. I moved to a new area and am starting from scratch. My coworkers suck and I’m not going back to school, so I’m meeting people through going out, meet ups, etc.

[d0nnivain]

Instead of just saying It was nice to meet you, add maybe we could grab a coffee or something sometime.

 

Just keep putting yourself out there. It's not easy but be brave.

[preraph]

In advance, try to think of something you can send the person later. Like have a funny meme or article and chat about it and then go, "Put your number in my phone and I'll find and send it to you. It's so funny." Or some event info, whatever. Just an excuse to get their number and make contact.

 

Ask about what they like to do for hobbies, and if you connect with any of it, say, Well, let's go ____ this weekend if you're not busy. If she says she isn't sure, say, well, here's my number if you change your mind.

 

Find out what movies she likes. If there's one you haven't seen that she likes, say, Oh, you should come over and we'll watch it together this weekend (or whenever).

 

It isn't easy, I know. You know, my best friend who I've now known for 30-some years, was a new employee where I worked at the time and she saw me in a club at a gig and just cornered me and said "I want to be friends with you." She doesn't remember it....hah. drinking.

 

Also, of course, I go way back to the crazy 70s when everyone partied a lot, but one good way to make friends is to go out to someplace you like the crowd and already have an afterparty planned at your place. If you have a place that's noise-sensitive, this can be an issue, of course. But you can always just invite 4 or 5 of the ones who look like they wouldn't be yelling and screaming once there. Have booze on hand and music or videos or whatever, something to munch on, and just ask them over. Most people will go have free drinks at anyone's place! And that's a quick way to ingratiate yourself.

 

Or if you have an apartment, you can also get permission to have a pool party, and when you're out at the club, invite people to the pool party the next night or whatever. Or you have a back yard, invite people to come to your barbecue the next day.

 

If you have a dog, go to the dog park. Tell people you're new in town that you might want to know. Or just walk the dog. But dogpark is better because you see some people over and over.

Good luck.

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

I don't think it's weird to ask for a number or email address . Making friends late in life can be hard, so that gesture is usually appreciated!

 

One of my best girlfriends I have these days is someone I met through a professional/service relationship. She's my dog sitter. We became Facebook friends through our dog sitting relationship and then she messaged me one day, telling me I seemed like a very nice person, that she was just starting a divorce process and had nobody to talk to about it, and asked me to meet her for dinner. The rest is history. We're not exactly alike, but we have a ton in common and I'm soooo glad she reached out to me since it can be really hard to make new friends as adults!

[snowboy91]

I don't think it's weird to ask for a number or email address . Making friends late in life can be hard, so that gesture is usually appreciated!

 

This. It's really surprising how many people are worried about asking for contact details... so if someone else makes that effort, they are appreciated for being bold. So just be that bold person and ask - 9 times out of 10 it will be appreciated. And if it's not... well, they're not the kind of person you want to be friends with anyway.

 

I just ask people what the best way to get in contact is. They get the decision whether to provide an email address, phone number, social media, etc.