Why do people get in relationships when they still like someone else/ still love some

[Devencianna]

Are relationships a game to some people

Edited May 20, 2018 by a LoveShack.org Moderator

[coolheadal]

That depends on the person who's only purpose it to make it a game. I personally not looking for game players. I am looking for serious minded women who are on the same track as me. Track is getting tight too. I've tried online dating, going to parties, at the supermarket, at work. Not doing clubs and other nightlife because those type of women are not serious at all. Everyone I met online turned out to be a dud, sorry to say that but they all lied and they don't have the time to spend for a great relationship. I've met someone from work it's been a year at it. To me every women I met are pretty much the same some care more than others. Some not really into your money, some will treat you special. Those that play the games with relationship are still married, going through a divorce, are separated, have someone living with them, still have the ex in their life, have more than 4 kids, have grand-kids, don't have you first in their mind. I can go on and on about the games. It was brought to my attention some women will put the pet (animal) first before you step in the door. I've never encounter those games either. Again I am not into games of any kind. I don't see the point to play games.

[carhill]

Power. When things go sideways they lose power. Hence the game. Power is the motivator IME. That shared, I love to watch the pros at work. Truly gifted. Winning. That is the end game of life. To win. Look at everyday life with a dispassionate view. It surrounds us. Those who play the game and play it well are the winners in life, be it power, money, social status, love, progeny, you name it. Everyone loves a winner and shuns a loser. Watch how quick a guy gets replaced or upgraded if he slips. Masterful.

[Chilli]

l'd say under those circumstances they're just weak people that can't be alone. Sneaky self serving morons.

 

As far as games, l dunno. Seems everyone thinks everyone is playing games these days, don't get any of it. l'd say a lot the so called games though are just 1/2 fkd in the head idiots that don't know wtf they're doing or want.

[snowboy91]

If they're just out of a relationship and still like their ex, or if they've just been rejected, then the next relationship is being used as an attempt to force themselves to move on. It often doesn't end well.

[alphamale]

because most people are idiots

[nospam99]

Everyone loves a winner and shuns a loser.

 

Interesting ....

 

Everyone? Not me. I've always 'marched to my own drummer'.

 

Winners I love:

- Bill Belichick

- Bill Gates

- Tiger Woods

 

Winners I 'shun' (hate and despise):

- Steve Jobs

- Mark Zuckerberg

- Vince McMahon

- Carly Fiorina

- Bill Clinton

- Hillary Clinton

- Barack Obama

- Mitt Romney (winner?, maybe not)

- Rush Limbaugh

- Donald Trump

- people who game other people's emotions (finally back on topic)

 

Clearly I have a 'liar/thief/abuser threshold' beyond which winners lose my respect.

Edited May 20, 2018 by nospam99

[d0nnivain]

Are relationships a game to some people

 

 

When a relationship ends it hurts. The person who got hurt wants to soothe that pain. They think the best / fastest way to do that is to get with somebody else who will love them through the pain.

 

It happens so often, there is a name for it: rebound.

 

There are also clichés: the fastest way to get over 1 person, is to get under another person.

 

You just failed to recognize the signs. What happened to you is exactly why we advise against starting to date people who are fresh off a break up.

[somanymistakes]

A lot of people are encouraged to get into new relationships to try and help them get over their exes. In many cases it works.

 

Sometimes it doesn't.

[Chilli]

Thing is . that usually ends up at the expense of the rebound , who hears all the right stuff at first and begins to have hopes and strong feelings.

Only to hear down the track oops , sorry, brain fart, l'm all better now, bye.

This is why l'm not exactly nice talking about these using people as so many have been on the receiving end.

[CautiouslyOptimistic]

Because they falsely assume it will help them get over their ex.

[carhill]

Interesting ....

 

Everyone? Not me. I've always 'marched to my own drummer'.

 

Winners I love:

- Bill Belichick

- Bill Gates

- Tiger Woods

 

Winners I 'shun' (hate and despise):

- Steve Jobs

- Mark Zuckerberg

- Vince McMahon

- Carly Fiorina

- Bill Clinton

- Hillary Clinton

- Barack Obama

- Mitt Romney (winner?, maybe not)

- Rush Limbaugh

- Donald Trump

- people who game other people's emotions (finally back on topic)

 

Clearly I have a 'liar/thief/abuser threshold' beyond which winners lose my respect.

 

Everyone you named will have a well-attended funeral if they already haven't and people will spew glowing recounts of their voluminous contributions to society. It won't matter who they've damaged or destroyed on the way. Exceptions? Sure. You and me but really who cares? We're nothing. That's how popularity and power works. We see at the micro level with relationship gamers. Watch the attractive and popular people who choose to game the system use other humans. It's really enlightening. There's always another one to game. New ones born each day.

[preraph]

I ended up in relationships while I was still in love with someone else because the someone else did something heinous and I couldn't stay with him. I was surprised when four different guy friends came out of the corners to rally around me when the bad thing happened. I have to say I'm grateful because without all those pleasant distractions and guys making me feel wanted and being nice and caring about me in different diverse ways, I'm not sure how I'd have gotten through those first few months.

[guest569]

Fill the void

[marky00]

Because, some people go around for years still feeling a pang for someone. Guys in particular can think about women that got away for quite a long time.

 

At some point you move on and decide you have to give things a crack. But until you find someone else who lives up to your lost love, there will always be that "what if" in the back of the mind.

 

Dating people when your an emotional wreck after being dumped recently etc isn't cool and is always destined to hurt someone else.

 

But if your talking about someone a few years out of a relationship, functioning close to normal but still has the odd pang for a lost love. I have more sympathy for someone in that case mainly because that's me right now Sure, I would prefer it if i'd never met my ex but that is unrealistic. As we get older, we have baggage but at some point you need to live. I'm not going to wait around for 5 years until my ex is totally out of my head. I will of course try my best to not hurt people (too much) along the way.

[alphamale]

- Mark Zuckerberg

 

I also hate this man. He reminds me of a robot dressed up to look human

[somanymistakes]

Because, some people go around for years still feeling a pang for someone. Guys in particular can think about women that got away for quite a long time.

 

At some point you move on and decide you have to give things a crack. But until you find someone else who lives up to your lost love, there will always be that "what if" in the back of the mind.

 

Dating people when your an emotional wreck after being dumped recently etc isn't cool and is always destined to hurt someone else.

 

But if your talking about someone a few years out of a relationship, functioning close to normal but still has the odd pang for a lost love. I have more sympathy for someone in that case mainly because that's me right now Sure, I would prefer it if i'd never met my ex but that is unrealistic. As we get older, we have baggage but at some point you need to live. I'm not going to wait around for 5 years until my ex is totally out of my head. I will of course try my best to not hurt people (too much) along the way.

 

 

It's a lose-lose situation. It's not fair to expect someone to remain a monk for the rest of their life mourning over a lost love, but it also sucks to realise that your partner still has feelings for a long-ago ex.

[central]

a) Because their like/love is not reciprocated, so they move on.

b) Because it is possible to love more than one person at a time.

c) Because they lack the self-awareness to avoid a poor decision.

[gone_girl]

Just procrastinating on feeling hurt

[Agonistes]

Because one relationship isn't enough for some people?

[Mysterio]

My buddy DT got his GF when she was just separted from her x in 2013. Met the kids a month after dating. Moved in together due to a baby in 2015. Had a 2017 baby as well.

 

Now and only now. After DT proposed early in 2018. Lawyers are being kicked into the Divorce. Not in 2013 so she could be free, before she looked DT up, as they were ex BF/GF in the lat 90's.

 

I wish she would have been divorced first. I hope DT does not use it against her.