No_Go Posted June 27, 2018 Share Posted June 27, 2018 Good point but IMO practicing with different partners doesn’t really help to become better in ‘pleasuring’. I mean every person has different preferences so mastering one general technique doesn’t help... My least experienced partner (he was nearly 37 when he lost his virginity, less than an Year before we met) mastered it because he and I were having lots of sex so he adjusted to my preferences. Basically his lack of experience in bed was non-issue after the first few weeks. NG, for a guy the big deal is pleasing your partner. At least in the 'industrialized west' of the 21st century, the feminism-conditioned male is expected to 'pleasure' the female as well as (secondarily) getting himself off. Given the variation on how that works from one women to the next, don't you agree that 'practice makes perfect'? So is virginity the disease or is the disease lack of sexual experience? Link to post Share on other sites
Mysterio Posted June 27, 2018 Share Posted June 27, 2018 If we think about it. Everybody is a virgin to each other if you have never had sex with them. They don't know what makes you hot or not. They don't know. Sex is exploring pleasure with someone that you did. I don't have sex on a regular basis. The reason is because I am not with a GF. Also. Most women I know are not open to sex like that with anyone. Most female aquintances that I know are not itching to jump my bones and the other guys around them I think that men would have more casual sex than women. If all my women friends were to be cut loose from their BF/Husbands. No way would they be on the hunt from it. Not towards me or any free man in their lives. Link to post Share on other sites
LilithD Posted June 27, 2018 Share Posted June 27, 2018 There is no shame in being a virgin forever if that's what one wishes. Who are we to judge and criticize others for choosing to remain chaste? The perception that an older male or female virging is somehow weird or cold is a cruel assumption. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Mysterio Posted June 28, 2018 Share Posted June 28, 2018 We don't live in a world where we get everything we want all the time. I don't think that Virginity is all that big a deal. I think more than anything. Not having friends is more worse in terms of life experiences, Way worse than Virginity/having a love relationships. My sex life is like this. Self pleasing./only have sex with a GF or a woman I am dating for several weeks. In my neck of the woods. I never feel like the women around me are fretting about a lack of sex. It would be easy for them to get it. The men around them would be more eager. I just think its too much of a major life dynamic for women to have sex on whims, get pregnant and the woman have to take care of the baby. The man can cut out at anytime. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted June 28, 2018 Share Posted June 28, 2018 There is no shame in being a virgin forever if that's what one wishes. Who are we to judge and criticize others for choosing to remain chaste? The perception that an older male or female virging is somehow weird or cold is a cruel assumption. In fairness, if not for cruelty, judgement and criticism, this forum would be seldom visited and unmoderated In real life, again having lived it into my mid-30's, I never felt judged, abused, criticized, any of that. People didn't care. The woman who took it never knew. It was a non-issue. STD's, far bigger issue. Imagine being a genital virgin going in for a STD panel. I wonder what the results would be? However, that act reinforced the normality of a man that age being sexually active. Potential partners accepted it as such. The title might be construed as a misnomer but for many a sexually inexperienced/chaste person is an anathema, different, odd, to some mentally/emotionally stunted and diseased, especially if well into the adult years. One distinction to draw is those who are/were virgins by choice (I was that) and those who were/are virgins in spite of their choice and preference to be sexually active. Dating and mating, at its core, is discriminatory, brutal and often quite cruel. It certainly is rarely or never fair. Virgins get their version of that. One more thing. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
ZA Dater Posted June 28, 2018 Share Posted June 28, 2018 There are asexual people, and we need to be accepting of that. I've always wondered if some of the people who torment themselves and make excuses why they haven't had sex are maybe just asexual. But if they are, they shouldn't be pining away about it and torturing themselves over how to get a woman but should just admit they don't really care and be at peace. Probably because the media has made relationships all about sex and nothing else. No sex= no chance of a relationship at all. The real disease here isn't virginity its the disease of media and the judgements people arrive at because of what the media writes. How many times have you walked past a newsstand "how your man should please you" "best sex positions" "what your man should to make you orgasm". All this does is raise the apparent importance of sex. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
5x5 Posted June 29, 2018 Share Posted June 29, 2018 Probably because the media has made relationships all about sex and nothing else. No sex= no chance of a relationship at all. Well for most adults, dating is about finding sexual partners for sexual relationships. If you're looking for platonic friends, then dating people is pursuing the wrong audience. The real disease here isn't virginity its the disease of media and the judgements people arrive at because of what the media writes. How many times have you walked past a newsstand "how your man should please you" "best sex positions" "what your man should to make you orgasm". All this does is raise the apparent importance of sex. Neither virginity or the media are a disease. As to the references to sex that you see on some popular magazine covers, you ought to understand that they offering articles about sex because it appeals to the mass market audience. To suggest or infer that the media drive sexual mores and attitudes, is putting the cart before the horse. Humans as a species (and mass market audience) are very sexual animals, one should expect sex or material about sex to have considerable appeal as a consequence of our nature. Since most humans desire sex and the majority of adult humans find themselves in sexual relationships, it is hardly a surprise that sex is of some interest and importance to them. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author despairingbuttrying Posted August 6, 2018 Author Share Posted August 6, 2018 Since most humans desire sex and the majority of adult humans find themselves in sexual relationships, it is hardly a surprise that sex is of some interest and importance to them. Which is why when you are not in that majority, life is very difficult and at times unbearable having to miss out on something that is natural and should just happen. Additionally, even worse if you are a virgin. People like myself should never have been born. Link to post Share on other sites
guest569 Posted August 6, 2018 Share Posted August 6, 2018 Which is why when you are not in that majority, life is very difficult and at times unbearable having to miss out on something that is natural and should just happen. Additionally, even worse if you are a virgin. People like myself should never have been born. Hey despairing butt, everyone is born a virgin. We are all born with this 'disease'. So none of us should have been born? Sex is not something that just comes naturally or easily for most people. It doesn't 'just happen' people go out of their way and out of their comfort zone to 'do the deed' for the first time. At least that's how it was for me. I didn't simply slip and fall onto one. Instinct did not take over and guide me. I didn't know what to do and neither did my partner. Did it concern me? Absolutely. Did I declare it a great 'tragedy'? Hell no. That would be a massive overreaction. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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