dazedandconfused2017 Posted May 20, 2018 Share Posted May 20, 2018 I have a female friend at the gym I use. We talk frequently and when we're at the gym together, we talk almost exclusively to each other while we work oout. We worked out earlier this week, but a few days passed since we saw each other. When I saw her yesterday, I approached to say hi as she was leaving (as I was arriving) and she was very brief. She basically said "have a nice day" and walked away without as much as a smile. As far as I can tell, we both enjoyed our last workout together, and yesterday was the first contact since. I feel like I was brushed off yesterday. I'm trying not to let it bother me, but it does. Women...or men...any advice. Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted May 20, 2018 Share Posted May 20, 2018 If you happen to have Facebook, here's a good link: To sum up, you have no clue what was on her mind. It likely had nothing to do with you at all. Maybe she just got a phone call about a relative dying or just lost her job. Link to post Share on other sites
snowboy91 Posted May 21, 2018 Share Posted May 21, 2018 Could be literally anything. Examples that are less concerning - might be in a rush to go see friends or family for dinner, or catch her favourite TV show. Or a bad day at work. You can't really draw any accurate conclusions based on one seemingly negative interaction where all the others have been positive. See what happens next time you see her. Link to post Share on other sites
Chilli Posted May 21, 2018 Share Posted May 21, 2018 Or to sum up , haha l like that. Yet another one that's posting on the internet when it probably hasn't even been 24 hours. See how she is next time and if she's still as you think giving you the cold shoulder, ask her what's up. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
salparadise Posted May 21, 2018 Share Posted May 21, 2018 I agree with CO above... you have no idea what it was about. You don't know that it was about you. Your intuition/ego is saying it might be. IF it was about you, my guess is that she's been expecting you to ask her out, and that little window of opportunity just slammed shut. Link to post Share on other sites
act00 Posted May 21, 2018 Share Posted May 21, 2018 If she was leaving, she probably didn't have the time to stay and chat; she had someplace to be. It could also be that you're gym friends only. Maybe since you haven't been around in a few days and she's mildly annoyed with that, as she's been waiting for you to ask her out and you pulled a disappearing act. I wouldn't put a lot on this one interaction. She probably had someplace to be and couldn't chat with you. See how things go with her the next time you're at the gym together. Link to post Share on other sites
ChatroomHero Posted May 21, 2018 Share Posted May 21, 2018 I have had interactions like that and I have always taken it to be kind of telling. Like she might be bothered by you or not interested in your previous interactions, or annoyed by you...even if it seemed like she enjoyed talking to you. I have also seen other people in situations like that where they talk to someone and are friendly like that at the gym or somewhere, then when the person leaves say they can't stand talking to that person, or how the person keeps bothering them. Personally I could be having the worst day in the world and I would at least tell someone I was friendly with, hello, I am in a hurry, sorry we can talk later, at least smile...whatever. If you are posting here about it, I am guessing it was a pretty clear snub or dismissal. My impression would be that she is not as interested in talking to you as it appeared. I bet if you backed off at the gym, she probably wouldn't go out of her way to interact with you. Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted May 21, 2018 Share Posted May 21, 2018 People have lives, and have stresses, etc. I wouldn't take it personally. She was just having an off day probably. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dazedandconfused2017 Posted May 21, 2018 Author Share Posted May 21, 2018 We've been talking for 2 years. We're both in committed relationships. The only reason I posed in dating is because it's a male/female relationship, albeit, platonic. I'm the only one at the gym that she'll take her earbuds out for, and if I don't initiate conversation, she does. We last worked out on Tuesday. She was out of the gym Wednesday and Thursday because of work, and then I see her Saturday and get what feels like a brush-off. Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted May 21, 2018 Share Posted May 21, 2018 She probably doesn't want people at the gym to think you're her boyfriend. She may have other interests there. She may like you just fine for a friend but want to keep a boundary so she doesn't look taken. Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted May 21, 2018 Share Posted May 21, 2018 She probably doesn't want people at the gym to think you're her boyfriend. She may have other interests there. She may like you just fine for a friend but want to keep a boundary so she doesn't look taken. Yes, now that we know she's in a committed relationship, maybe this is the case. Maybe there was someone there in the gym who knows both her and her boyfriend and she didn't want that person to see her talking to you. Maybe this should be a reminder to not emotionally invest in this girl...... 3 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted May 21, 2018 Share Posted May 21, 2018 Maybe there's trouble in paradise. And the BF saw you two talking....you know he started to have suspicions. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
preraph Posted May 21, 2018 Share Posted May 21, 2018 A lot of people just don't want any talk. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 23, 2018 Share Posted May 23, 2018 We've been talking for 2 years. We're both in committed relationships. The only reason I posed in dating is because it's a male/female relationship, albeit, platonic. I'm the only one at the gym that she'll take her earbuds out for, and if I don't initiate conversation, she does. We last worked out on Tuesday. She was out of the gym Wednesday and Thursday because of work, and then I see her Saturday and get what feels like a brush-off. You're investing way too much into someone you only see and speak to at the gym. You don't know what is going on in her life. Maybe she just didn't want to hang out and talk. Maybe she was not feeling well or had to rush home. Is this the same woman you gave a bday gift to and she didn't say hbd to you or give you a gift? Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted May 23, 2018 Share Posted May 23, 2018 I have a female friend at the gym I use. We talk frequently and when we're at the gym together, we talk almost exclusively to each other while we work oout. We worked out earlier this week, but a few days passed since we saw each other. When I saw her yesterday, I approached to say hi as she was leaving (as I was arriving) and she was very brief. She basically said "have a nice day" and walked away without as much as a smile. As far as I can tell, we both enjoyed our last workout together, and yesterday was the first contact since. I feel like I was brushed off yesterday. I'm trying not to let it bother me, but it does. Women...or men...any advice. Stop this.. Be more assertive with yourself. Boy don't let this girl mess with your head. Next time you see her you can do the same thing, but doing so just make you as bad as her. If I was you just brush this off as one of those days. Everyone gets this way. Just have to pull yourself together okay.. Link to post Share on other sites
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