morrowrd Posted May 22, 2018 Share Posted May 22, 2018 I was married 23 years, and I hated it. I dated after divorce, and then discovered a co-worker had a crush on me, someone I never thought I'd have a chance with. We dated, moved in together, and after 2 years married in April. What's weird, is I thought and we always talked about being married would mean all of our romantic life would be encompassed by the legal boundaries of marriage. Nothing would change...except we'd be married. Things have changed. I look at her differently, I look at sex differently, our datenights are different, every damn thing is different. We are a couple who are actually in love with each other and I'm guessing that's the difference. I haven't been able to pin point why it feels different, we've lived together for 2 years, and don't really do anything different, but it feels different. In a good way to clarify things. Like making bright things, brighter. Does anyone else feel that? Or at least understand...or trying to figure the same thing out? Link to post Share on other sites
RecentChange Posted May 23, 2018 Share Posted May 23, 2018 We we're together 14 years before we got married. Can't say making it official made any measurable difference in our daily lives or how we interact with each other. Why do you say it's all different? Link to post Share on other sites
Author morrowrd Posted May 23, 2018 Author Share Posted May 23, 2018 She's my wife now, instead of girlfriend. Everything feels so much more solid, and I like being in the relationship even more now. The first time I was very young, 23 - I felt absolutely nothing different after we were married. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted May 23, 2018 Share Posted May 23, 2018 My EX used to say marriage was just a piece of paper. That was his primary excuse why we never married throughout our 10+ year relationship. When I got married, I woke up the next day & really felt the solemnity of the vows we took. A break up no longer entailed just saying "I want out" now we'd need lawyers, time & court orders. We'd be breaking immense promises. He was my FAMILY. I had all these other new family members. It was a big deal. At first it was scary. I found my 1st year of marriage quite difficult. Having never been married, I struggled to function as a team. Gradually we melded more into each other & now I can't image being without him. He's my rock no matter what & there have been some challenges, including my depression which left me struggling to function. It is soooooooo much more then a piece of paper but it's soooooo much better. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
somanymistakes Posted May 23, 2018 Share Posted May 23, 2018 It really depends on the couple and what you invest into it. It's like holidays. Christmas can be just another day, or it can be very meaningful. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
awesomeblondie Posted May 23, 2018 Share Posted May 23, 2018 Getting married didn't really make a difference in my relationship. But moving from one side of the country to another a few year later did. When we moved it was just the two of us against the world, and it strengthened our partnership. But every relationship is different and it is what you make of it. I'm glad to hear that you're happy with your current relationship! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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