mortensorchid Posted June 7, 2018 Share Posted June 7, 2018 A few months ago I started chatting with this guy on Facebook. I think we had friended each other a while back, I don't remember. One day many months ago he reached out to me after seeing some posts I was making. He said he thought he would reach out to me. I asked why. He said from the looks of your posts you are unhappy because your job is frustrating, you don't have anyone and you think you are too old to attract someone to you. I said yes on all accounts. He and I had a few talks over time. He said he wanted to see me, I said according to his relationship status he was married. He said he and his wife are in an open relationship and she's okay with that. I said I'm sorry I don't do that unless I hear it's okay from his wife (which I would not). He unfriended me. I was hurt by that. In a small way I was that is. He reached out to me and I felt like I had a low level of trust in him, and then he showed his true colors of what he wanted and when I said no, he is no longer interested. Another blow to my self esteem, I cried a few tears, but it's what it is. Link to post Share on other sites
CautiouslyOptimistic Posted June 7, 2018 Share Posted June 7, 2018 He said from the looks of your posts you are unhappy because your job is frustrating, you don't have anyone and you think you are too old to attract someone to you. I said yes on all accounts. It's probably best to keep information like this off Facebook. As you've experienced, it can attract people who just want to take advantage of you. It could also alienate friends you already have. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
BaileyB Posted June 7, 2018 Share Posted June 7, 2018 Reality check - your self esteem is injured because some random MARRIED guy that you DO NOT KNOW but have been talking to on the Internet unfriended you when you refused to meet him... or rather, refused to have sex with him (ie. help him to cheat on his wife). Seriously! My friend, whether this guy wants you to be Facebook friends or not should not matter one bit to your self esteem or your self worth. Dust yourself off and say, good riddance... He revealed himself for what he really is - you should be glad about that, not sad. YOU are a beautiful and worthy person... Don't let anyone ever make you feel otherwise. Truly, is there nobody that you can talk too? A free counselling centre for women, an employee counselling program, a physician. Your pain and lonliness is so evident in your writing... I hope you can find some support. Hugs to you. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
DrReplyInRhymes Posted June 7, 2018 Share Posted June 7, 2018 A few months ago I started chatting with this guy on Facebook. I think we had friended each other a while back, I don't remember. One day many months ago he reached out to me after seeing some posts I was making. He said he thought he would reach out to me. I asked why. He said from the looks of your posts you are unhappy because your job is frustrating, you don't have anyone and you think you are too old to attract someone to you. I said yes on all accounts. He and I had a few talks over time. He said he wanted to see me, I said according to his relationship status he was married. He said he and his wife are in an open relationship and she's okay with that. I said I'm sorry I don't do that unless I hear it's okay from his wife (which I would not). He unfriended me. I was hurt by that. In a small way I was that is. He reached out to me and I felt like I had a low level of trust in him, and then he showed his true colors of what he wanted and when I said no, he is no longer interested. Another blow to my self esteem, I cried a few tears, but it's what it is. If you want someone to talk to who has no agenda against you whatsoever, you can always send me a pm or start more threads or whatever. You post wayyy too intelligently to go without a good conversation. Another perspective - You should feel like you were totally just hit on. Just pretend he isn't married. You got hit on! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted June 9, 2018 Share Posted June 9, 2018 A few months ago I started chatting with this guy on Facebook. I think we had friended each other a while back, I don't remember. One day many months ago he reached out to me after seeing some posts I was making. He said he thought he would reach out to me. I asked why. He said from the looks of your posts you are unhappy because your job is frustrating, you don't have anyone and you think you are too old to attract someone to you. I said yes on all accounts. He and I had a few talks over time. He said he wanted to see me, I said according to his relationship status he was married. He said he and his wife are in an open relationship and she's okay with that. I said I'm sorry I don't do that unless I hear it's okay from his wife (which I would not). He unfriended me. I was hurt by that. In a small way I was that is. He reached out to me and I felt like I had a low level of trust in him, and then he showed his true colors of what he wanted and when I said no, he is no longer interested. Another blow to my self esteem, I cried a few tears, but it's what it is. Do you know this guy? I mean is he a friend from the past? or just some random guy from facebook? Bolded. You stood your ground and he deleted you. He wasn't interested in 'friendship' the way you want it, he wanted more and realized you weren't going to give 'it' to him so he unfriended you. He did you a favour! Don't feel sad or upset about this. You did nothing wrong! You stood up for yourself, showed love and respect for yourself and he isn't worthy of you. Don't let this man ruin your self confidence or self esteem! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted June 9, 2018 Share Posted June 9, 2018 I was hurt by that. Try to place the hurt where it belongs, the guy was a user, a cheater and someone who was going to rip your heart out and hand you back a bunch of scar tissue. You have yourself to thank for keeping your heart safe and showing proper boundaries... A big set of hugz for you for being you... be kind to yourself 1 Link to post Share on other sites
act00 Posted June 10, 2018 Share Posted June 10, 2018 Yep, I know. It hurts to be unfriended. You weren't his friend and you didn't want to be a friend or more than friends, so it really shouldn't matter, but it does...it's still a rejection and it still hurts. Even if rationally, who gives a sh**?? I get it. Back to reality and the people who are important. (hug) 1 Link to post Share on other sites
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