longjohn Posted June 21, 2018 Share Posted June 21, 2018 I've worked with this lady for the last 3 years and recently we've talked quite a bit more about things beyond work. She seems like a nice lady, she's divorced around the same age as I. We've gone to lunch a few times even had a work dinner one time. We now work different shifts so the only contact we have at work is via email. She seems quite stressed at work so I thought I'd be nice and asked her to join a few of us (non work people) after work one night for a drink. She came along we all had a few drinks and a laugh and that was that. A week later she asks if I'd like to go to dinner with her so I said yes, I asked when she was free she says Wednesday then says she wants another coworker to join us to which I agree. A few hours later she cancels dinner and I don't year a word from her until Friday after I'd texted just to say hello. Then Saturday rolls around and she doesn't respond again. Almost a week later I sent another nice.. "how are you, hows things in the office etc" no response. At work a legitimate email is answered with a single short sentence vs the usual Q and A back and forth. Apparently I've done something wrong and I've tried to figure it out but honestly I hate to sound like an arsehole but I couldn't care less. I just don't get/like suddenly being ignored. Anyway I'm leaving the company in two months. I hate to leave with someone thinking I'm a dick but I really have no idea how we went from friends to ignored in the space of a day? Link to post Share on other sites
fredflint Posted June 21, 2018 Share Posted June 21, 2018 I've worked with this lady for the last 3 years and recently we've talked quite a bit more about things beyond work. She seems like a nice lady, she's divorced around the same age as I. We've gone to lunch a few times even had a work dinner one time. We now work different shifts so the only contact we have at work is via email. She seems quite stressed at work so I thought I'd be nice and asked her to join a few of us (non work people) after work one night for a drink. She came along we all had a few drinks and a laugh and that was that. A week later she asks if I'd like to go to dinner with her so I said yes, I asked when she was free she says Wednesday then says she wants another coworker to join us to which I agree. A few hours later she cancels dinner and I don't year a word from her until Friday after I'd texted just to say hello. Then Saturday rolls around and she doesn't respond again. Almost a week later I sent another nice.. "how are you, hows things in the office etc" no response. At work a legitimate email is answered with a single short sentence vs the usual Q and A back and forth. Apparently I've done something wrong and I've tried to figure it out but honestly I hate to sound like an arsehole but I couldn't care less. I just don't get/like suddenly being ignored. Anyway I'm leaving the company in two months. I hate to leave with someone thinking I'm a dick but I really have no idea how we went from friends to ignored in the space of a day? Why don't you just ask her? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
d0nnivain Posted June 21, 2018 Share Posted June 21, 2018 Back off a while because she is a co-worker. If you press this she may cry to HR & complain that you are harassing her. You don't need that headache especially when you haven't done anything. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Adiron Posted June 21, 2018 Share Posted June 21, 2018 She's just one person one a planet with billions. You don't think you did anything seriously wrong, correct? So either she's over reacting to something really mild or she's simply not interested in talking to you because she has other issues of greater importance. Either way you're out of there in 2 months. Focus on something else. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
O'Malley Posted June 21, 2018 Share Posted June 21, 2018 I'd keep all contacts professional from now on. It doesn't sound like you did anything wrong, and your interactions with her seem more like friendly acquaintances than close friends. She also seems to have a more casual attitude towards plans with you; sometimes you have to adjust your expectations of people. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
coolheadal Posted June 21, 2018 Share Posted June 21, 2018 I've worked with this lady for the last 3 years and recently we've talked quite a bit more about things beyond work. She seems like a nice lady, she's divorced around the same age as I. We've gone to lunch a few times even had a work dinner one time. We now work different shifts so the only contact we have at work is via email. She seems quite stressed at work so I thought I'd be nice and asked her to join a few of us (non work people) after work one night for a drink. She came along we all had a few drinks and a laugh and that was that. A week later she asks if I'd like to go to dinner with her so I said yes, I asked when she was free she says Wednesday then says she wants another coworker to join us to which I agree. A few hours later she cancels dinner and I don't year a word from her until Friday after I'd texted just to say hello. Then Saturday rolls around and she doesn't respond again. Almost a week later I sent another nice.. "how are you, hows things in the office etc" no response. At work a legitimate email is answered with a single short sentence vs the usual Q and A back and forth. Apparently I've done something wrong and I've tried to figure it out but honestly I hate to sound like an arsehole but I couldn't care less. I just don't get/like suddenly being ignored. Anyway I'm leaving the company in two months. I hate to leave with someone thinking I'm a dick but I really have no idea how we went from friends to ignored in the space of a day? Let this one go, your leaving the company anyway.. To much hassle with them at work and you are trying to figure out what you did wrong will drive you nuts a work. Just put her out of your mind and finish-up the two months left at work. That's all you can do for now. Don't put more effort into this pile of doubt on your side. If she comes to you ever again you say "sorry I not interested or sorry I would need to take a rain check! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Malin889 Posted July 10, 2018 Share Posted July 10, 2018 You never know what people are going through in life. She could be having some personal problems you aren’t even aware of. Let her be and maybe she’ll come back. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
basil67 Posted July 10, 2018 Share Posted July 10, 2018 If you don't think you've done anything wrong, just give her space. Link to post Share on other sites
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